Anything else I should be doing? I should say that the more active dates were before his illness. Right now even playing a board game gives him a headache and he doesn't really enjoy them anymore. Hiking ( our favorite activity) is out. So right now we are talking a lot, but it mostly circles around how he is doing. That said, I don't know what else there is to talk about since he isn't really doing anything else. I've read the Boring Conversation article but I just don't see how to fix it. The conversations are about the future ad nauseum: what will he do, how is he doing, etc. Balancing it is hard... I can talk about church or the kids but then I have nothing else to talk about. We went and saw a movie and that gave us some stuff to talk about. I've been married to him for 25 years. I know most things about him. I'm not sure what there is left to investigate nor exactly how to do that... I love him with all my heart, but I'm ready to have fun!
I have been struggling with finding things to talk about with my DH, though for a different reason (he doesn't like to talk so I quit trying to talk with him years ago, so now it's like relearning how to have a conversation for the pleasure of having a conversation - ANYHOW here are some things that have been working for me:
1. I ask him about things he did when he was a kid. I know you've been together 25 years but some of these stories people love retelling. I delve in - what were you thinking, why did they do that, etc...
2. I ask him about topics he's an expert on (certain sports things) and try to be genuinely interested.
3. I wonder if you can learn something together and discuss that. MB Obviously. But additionally there are lots of fascinating things out there. Like Kwik Learning Programs. It was amazing what we learned and not physical like you enjoy but still pretty stimulating. Or learn a new language. Or painting. Lots of possibilities. Then you can talk about that - RC and IC. (I don't know what his health issues preclude - if he gets headaches...) Of course rehashing his health issues is probably actually bad for his health at some point.
4. Current events. If you can discuss the news without getting too agitated. (My DH and I have similar views but still have trouble discussing the news.)
