How are you doing, PW?

I am OK. His lawyer is finally talking with my lawyer and his lawyer wants us to do some unnecessary rigamarole, but its harmless and I can do it without paying my lawyer, so we are proceeding. he is also making a big deal about me selling some furniture on craigslist (I make like $250 on it or something). It's just dumb. However,I think he will sign because he wants to get us (my daughter and I) out of the way. He could cause all kinds of problems for me, but then I would file for child and spousal support right away and he doesn't want that.

He knows we are leaving on Sunday and hasn't done anything to stop us. He just asked to go to my daughter's Christmas party at school tomorrow, which is fine, because I am busy packing.

So, I am getting to go, relatively hassle free I think and protected from him filing a court order to bring my daughter back (every lawyer I talked to had really bad things to say about just leaving, which is why I went to all of this trouble).

So, overall, OK. I am really looking forward to Christmas with my daughter, Dad, stepmom, and friends in OC. We have lots of things planned already with my best friend and her daughter and my dad has already gotten a tree for my daughter.

Really glad to hear this. Soon to be a lot less stressful for you, I hope.

WH found cheaterville post of OW. I forgot I had put it up. Now is threatening not to sign. Should I take it down?

Could you put it back up later?

Of course.

I hate negotiating with a terrorist though.

Have whoever told you about WH finding out about the post tell him
"She forgot about the Cheaterville post. She will attempt to delete it."

That way, you don't get drawn into the drama and can move forward.

The exposure has occurred and you can be the benevolent woman who isn't competing for him.

BTW.........he must still be hot for her to make this threat to protect her.

Yeah, I agree.

My IM told me. She also told me that the OWs social media sites were still open so she must not have been the one who found it. When I did exposure to friends and family before, she closed off Facebook and made Instagram private. After I went into plan B my IM checked her stuff and told me it was open (at the time, I told her I didn't want to know).

I actually think I will just leave it for a day or two. I'd like for him to tell his lawyer directly this is the reason he won't sign. I'd like to see if he goes to bat on this. I can just pretend I never got the message from my IM.

I left yesterday. He didn't try to stop us even though I didn't take cheaterville post down. If he is serious about the cheaterville post, let his attorney ask me to do it. That would be embarrassing to him and the attorney would just have to ask nicely because there is no law against telling the truth on the internet.

You are such a strong, focused and effective person. Your ex is going to wake up one day and slap himself for being so stupid.

Thanks Living Well. We will see how things go. I haven't heard from his lawyer.

My IM told me that he messaged her saying that his lawyer advised him to "stay out of it" on the cheaterville post and that the OW would take legal action herself if she wanted to.

That made me laugh. It's neither a crime nor libelous to post the truth on the internet. I'd love to see a lawyer that would even take this as a case.

It's amazing to me how Cheaterville just eats away at waywards. Like it's cheating in every case but their own, somehow. It's only calling a spade a spade!

I agree Axe.

It's because they blame the betrayed spouse. They want to protect the AP at all costs. That's cool. Protect her sorry butt.

Does he realize that I left him? I'm literally 500 miles away. If he tries to call me back, I will file immediate and take all do his money. I will also be "generous" and give him overnight visits with our daughter, which will ruin his affair and cost him more money as he tries to figure our to take care of her with is weird woke schedule.

I know, really!

There are some other sites I found as well-- playerblock and cheater registry. Any thoughts on these?

I would leave the other sites be and move toward your future now.
Refocus on protecting your finances and creating a great life for you and your child.

If your WH ever gets out of the fog he can re-engage you in the affair issues and addressing them then.

Meanwhile, just do not do anything else to get into the pain and drama.

You have done well so far and need to heal. You are MORE than a woman dealing with an affair. You are a person in your own right and deserve to leave the affair baggage at the curb for now.

Well put, Reading.

I agree. Exposure creates support for the BS, after that its main purpose is to help the wayward. You've done enough of that and your priority now is you.

When in Plan B always think, what's in this for me?

True. Any further post would just be out of spite and revenge. I am extremely annoyed by the lack of accountability on her part. However, I do know that living her life the way she does cannot lead to anything good, so I don't really need don't need to really contribute to that. It will happen on its own.

Yes, refocus on my daughter and me! Things are already way better just being away from Oakland, and him and my old life....