I'm listening now. I loved Dr. Harley's answer to "how much time would you give her."
Yes, as he mentioned when a bipolar person goes manic they can become paranoid. Thus when my wife says she needs time, I imagine waiting for her for ten years, wondering if she will ever love me again. In reality it will probably only take a few years.
One of the things he doesn't realize due to only having about 6 minutes talking to me before the show is how much good the therapy will do me. I have low self esteem issues that play into my medical issues and therapy will help tremendously with that.
I realize now that I do need to research further into medication to use for spot mania; I have only tried one so far, and there are a number of others. If it is simply a matter of medication as he says then I can prevent this from ever happening again.
I am going to talk to my wife at some point about getting control of my pay check. I could still quit my job but I would have to be way past sane to do that. Giving her control of my check would prevent me from simply withholding support from her if I get angry. This would make her feel more secure I would think.
I will probably need to demonstrate stability for several years in order for her to love me again. If we do end up planning on getting back together again we would spend a good amount of time laying ground rules and putting a plan in place to make her feel safe.
Oddly enough, the guy I plan on moving in with after my mother passes had some sort of episode today of which I do not know the details. I know he is on meds, not sure of his diagnosis. I thought it was ironic how I was now in the same situation as my wife is, living with someone who I am not sure is safe to be around, and I fully understood how she feels.
