The link to anger management is not working for me - it just does not play.

Archives are mentioned - where do i find those?

With thanks

Reading through other threads on your forum, trying to gain insight to these issues.....

I came across this....

"If you were lovebusting her or subjecting her to angry outbursts then Dr H would probably agree that you should go"

That being the case, and the fact i have 101% subjected her to angry outbursts, then its game over, right? There is no point in being on this forum. This forum as far as i can tell, is for saving marriages. But if there have been angry outbursts then the recommendation is for the one doing AO's to leave and go.

So what is really happening now is i have woken up too late and its way way to late to do anything about this other then clean up my act and go forward in life in a better state of mind? I need to find a self help forum, not a save the relationship forum.

I still cling to wanting to make it right with her, but on the other hand i am so devastated by what she has done to me behind my back for years. I need to make up my mind what it is i want.

But apart from all that the bottom line is still, if there have been angry outbursts then Dr Harley recommends i should leave.

Game over.

My apologies for taking up your time.

People on this forum will not help you to patch up a relationship with someone who is still married to someone else.

This is really not 'so complicated.' You were in a relationship and you love busted terribly, your *still married to someone else* girlfriend decided she had enough and left. Honestly, statistically speaking you had a very very low chance of success in this relationship to begin with.

You are correct in that this website is a Marriage Building website. However, I think most people here would agree that it is also a self help website. Dr Harley's principles, if applied, will help you be a better person and better in ALL your relationships, both romantic and otherwise.

Spend some time reading Dr Harley's principles. They will teach you how to be a better man and better relationship partner for the future.

PS This does not require long drawn out soliloquies.

You are not that fragile.

Ken, I'm trying to follow and I may be confused, so correct me if I'm wrong.

You are trying to fix your relationship with a woman who is still legally married to someone else.

You feel that if anyone is offended by your posts the solution is for them to not read and for only people who respect your situation to read your posts. Am I right?

The problem with that is that our forum does not support this situation. It's not just that we are offended - this is a misuse of the forum. The solution is not for people to just not read your posts; the solution is for you not to misuse the forum.

The solution to your personal situation is for you to never see or talk to this woman again. She has been a huge mistake in your life, and the sooner you move on, the better, and the sooner your head will clear. You wrote that you "thought better of getting married after you got to know her better." This is your cue, Ken - it's the evidence you need that you already know she is NOT the one for you. Cut your losses, spend some time growing personally, and move on!

I'll be notifying the moderators that you're using the forum to try to repair your relationship with a woman who is legally married to someone else. Dr. Harley doesn't support that and we on the board are not going to support it. If I'm misunderstanding, please correct me.