Haven't talked to him yet. Just got it minutes ago.

"Plaintiff submits that Defendant's actions are not only harassing and annoying but malicious and were for the purpose of embarrassing Plaintiff and damaging her career."

"Defendant has repeatedly and extensively violated the provision of the Temporary Restraining Orders which restrains the Defendant from annoying and harassing the Plaintiff. Defendant has placed multiple phone calls and sent numerous correspondences to friends, family, the corporate office of the Plaintiff's employer, several other individuals within the company with which Plaintiff is employed, and on social media sites regarding an alleged relationship between Plaintiff and a third party."

Wasn't most of your exposure done before the TRO? Also, she still has to prove harrassment.

Could you countersue, as she keeps getting police officers to call you with threats?

ALL of my exposure to her side was prior to the TRO. However, she is citing some of the exposure I did on his side which happened about Nov. 25th (TRO was issued on Nov.17).

I am talking to my attorney tomorrow - SMB and HPB seem to think it could get thrown out.

She also is claiming that it is alleged - so I could start that fire under my WW's butt when my attorney starts digging for evidence that it is not alleged.

Additionally, she probably just got my response and "served" recently. I only completed my paperwork a little while ago.

We will see after my talk with my lawyer tomorrow.

What kind of evidence do you have of the affair/identity of OM? I searched your thread and read about phone records plus what your wife told you. Do you have more evidence?

All I have is the phone records and the OMs behavior when confronted. She never told me who with. She described him and he certainly meets all the criteria.

I set of interrogatories sent to the right people could easily clear it up though I would think.

When I said "I have plenty to expose her with" I meant just the affair - I did not fully understand Exposure 101 at that time. She told me she was having an affair, I had enough to tell her family.

Typical dirty tactic by a wayward. It is serious, but an unfortunate manipulation of the legal system that is exploited by people with low character.

Your lawyer needs to fight fire with fire. If it goes to a hearing, your attorney needs to know how the judge leans. It is ridiculous to charge harrassment because you called someone with the truth and a desire to save your marriage. I forget how the first TRO was allowed, that should never been granted with an attorney with any know how.

Ugs. You must feel like you can't catch a break. Sometimes waywards are particularly nasty (mine was pretty awful) and unfortunately, that's what you go stuck with...

I agree with SMB and HPB that it doesn't sound like something that will stand up in court. Hang in there, WC.

I am prepared to offer you an apology SusieQ
One thing I am going to discuss with my attorney is validating the "alleged" relationship via interrogatories - which means.... more dollars!

But I have not talked to my attorney yet, he is calling me this evening to discuss this matter - we may just defer it all together. But this could be an opportunity to draw things out a little bit. My paperwork was filed and our pretrial date is in February.

Wrestler,

That sucks that a charge has been filed against you. I hope your attorney has the experience and a plan to get the charge dismissed. My thought, however, is to have a consult with an attorney who specializes in criminal law. It is a criminal charge. I think under the circumstances, at this point I would not contact your W for any reason. I would place any Plan A on hold. Good luck to you and some prayers.

Tom

Yah, might have to hold off on a Christmas present

Of course I was right Thank you for the apology.

I haven't paid him more (and he has not asked for more) money yet. So you just wait a minute...

My attorney just said "I strongly advise you not send her a Christmas present."

I was really excited about that.

I'm not worried about it! lol

This has been done before and its always a really oddball lawyer who scams his own clients and seems wayward themselves. It doesn't stand up but he still gets his payday.

Is there scope for you to claim harrasment of your family life and finances via the continued affair? Or to subpoena proof of on going affair, not an alleged one?

You can do this with defamation. If they say it's untrue slander, you can request phone records and all sorts of evidence be produced which means the A goes on very public record. Strangely even the craziest wayward (who always without fail shout slander!) never pursue a defamation claim, even though it would help their goal of fillibustering the BS into the ground. I think the subpoena threat is why. They like harrasment laws better for harrasment of BS.

Waywards loathe exposure and think legal fights can stop them. Actually legal processes should uncover truth which puts a snake into the court room fruit basket which should make them conveniently leap away.


Do the art of war; when weak appear strong, when strong appear weak.

If you can drag evidence of the A onto public record, you are strong. So say nothing and let them walk into that trap.

If you can't, and you are weak, imply that you can. Let word reach them either in the rumour mill, through WW, (if your lawyers game maybe even in a suitably threatening legal letter) that graphic, hitherto unseen affair evidence will have to be produced to refute very spurious and defamatory allegations about your motives.

Get it, just dont send it. A WW will love getting in touch with you to throw it in your face that you didn't send one. When she does that, get it out, ready gift wrapped and proffer it.

I have it, I am still going to wrap it. I was thinking about giving it to her at our Pretrial, unless the opportunity presents itself earlier...


indie, these are strong points. I have started to prepare for an all out assault if necessary. I have thought of exactly who I would send interrogatories to, subpoena on phone record, etc. I have gathered all messages I have sent, and what days I sent them.

HOWEVER I asked my lawyer to negotiate that my WW drop the charges, and in return I will cease exposure (I am done anyways). HerPapaBear and I spoke for a very long time talking about how I should proceed. The fact is, if OM was coming at me with these charges - I would not hesitate one bit to completely unload on him (however, it is likely he has much more financial backing than I do). But the fact of the matter is, its my wife. One thing HPB and I talked about was "Being able to identify when I am killing the affair, and when I am killing the affair at the cost of recovery." We both agreed that the best route to take was negotiate that the charges be dropped. If my WW (& her lawyer) refuse to drop the charges, consult my lawyer about counter suing or at least making this extremely unpleasant. I like this route, because sure - everything from this gets relayed to other man through my wife, but that is just it... it literally goes through my wife to get to him. She absorbs all the damage from this if I become extra persistent.

In other words, I am prepared for a war - but I think this is a fight that I do not need to fight for the marriage.

Now, if OM wants to send me some paperwork... we can dance. Might need donations though

I think that's a sound tactic. Handing him a hollow victory with an already-complete exposure is a time honoured method.

Also, if things do progress after your offer, its generally going to be more conflict in the A. At least you proffered peace.