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fretless, I'm sorry to hear about your husband's illness.
living_well, I'm very sorry for your loss.
BH (me) 50, WxW 47
Married 1994
D-day, plan A, & exposure Jan 2017
Divorced Nov 2017
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Thank you abrrba, it turned into a bit of a thread jack. Sorry fretless.
3 adult children
Divorced - he was a serial adulterer
Now remarried, thank you MB
(formerly lied_to_again)
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living_well, I am so sorry your brother did not receive treatment! In the US, there are states that have refused to take part in President Obama's Affordable Healthcare Act. Unfortunately, we live in one of those states. The most basic insurance costs 1 1/2 times our income, so we are uninsured. We have been blessed that a hospital 100 miles away has a brain tumor center and also has a mission statement that says they will treat all, without regard to their ability to pay. It is only through many Christians who truly walk the talk that my husband is receiving treatment. I am sure we'll have medical bills the rest of our lives, but I'm so thankful they are treating my husband. There is no 'thing' I want more than him.
Are there any Christian hospitals outside your healthcare system where you can seek help?
One new development in the treatment of glioblastoma is the Optune. An electro-magnetic device that inhibits the brain cancer cells' ability to multiply. Our doctors are very enthusiastic about this new device, as it has increased the survival rate for glioblastoma patients. Thank you fretless. My brother died about four weeks ago. It was a gentle and very easy death. His condition was terminal as the tumour was large. Everyone got a chance to visit him and say goodbye. US doctors are trained to keep treating no matter what the prognosis. Very different medical philosophy from the UK. You might want to get some statistics of possible outcomes from the doctors before bankrupting yourselves. Yes, I've googled it and read the stats on it. And I've checked on some of the basics about medical and financial. It seems pretty solid everywhere that no one can take our home, which is my biggest concern, financially. He will finish his radiation tomorrow, and has done very well. Now for a month rest and the Optune fitting. In a month there will be an MRI. We're going one day at a time with this. Those are two very different philosophies. I'm glad we have the option of treatment. And we have the option to not treat as well, but that never crossed his mind. The choices will be his, and I'll support whatever he decides. For now, we're doing what we can and hoping for the best. I'm so sorry you lost your brother. This is a sudden and swift illness. I'm glad everyone had a chance to visit and say goodbye, and I'm glad it was gentle and easy for him to cross over.
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Thank you abrrba, it turned into a bit of a thread jack. Sorry fretless. Oh gosh! No worries! I really appreciate your comments and experience. *hugs* I'll probably comment less frequently now, so as not to turn the MB forum into a medical forum. But I'll post important updates. I've learned a great deal through all the folks here, from Dr. Harley's books and the Harley's radio show. :-)
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To follow up and conclude this thread, I regret to say that my husband passed away from his illness. While this was not the outcome I was praying for, we became very close in the last year and I treasure the time we had.
He fought so hard to live, and I'm glad treatments were available to him. He came to a peace, met his 'Greeters', and was ok with where they would take him. He passed quietly while we napped, snuggled up together and holding hands.
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fretless, I am so sorry for your loss. I am glad you were able to be so close until the end. 
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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I'm so sorry to hear this, fretless.
BW
Married 1989
His PA 2003-2006
2 kids.
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I"m so sorry for your loss.
I followed your thread and rejoice that you were able to draw close during your last years together. Not only will that give you memories to treasure but it will also give you a more settled sense of closure.
Hugs,
S.
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I'm so sorry.  
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Dear Fretless,
very sorry to hear of the passing of your husband. At the same time, it is a blessing that you were together in this and experienced good moments together.
It is absolutely true that we are very dependent on our brains in terms of how we react.
How are you holding up? Will you continue to live were you are living right now?
Last edited by happyheart; 10/01/19 10:36 PM.
me, DH
all the children
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Thank you everyone for your condolences and best wishes. This is the most awful thing I have ever been through. I'm still not 'through' it, and I don't know if I ever will be. Since I live so far from family and friends, I have thought about moving, but cannot do it yet. I've spent my last year unpacking from our move and selling things I won't need to make ends meet. I've utilized IRS rule 72T to take a small amount from my retirement every year until I'm eligible for survivor's social security at 60. It's been very hard to unpack boxes that have my husband's handwriting on them. He was such a great packer - I have yet to find one item broken in the move. It's sad to dismantle what was to be our life.
For now, I keep busy with this project. I feel strongly that I need to clean up our 'mess' so no one else will be saddled with the job, should I pass. I'm not suicidal, but I have no purpose anymore and very little joy. I just get up every day and do what I need to do. I exist. I hope when I'm done my job with material things that I will have found a purpose, or will be in a better position to make a move.
I never knew being a widow was so hard. God threw me an outrageous hardball. I can only hope the next ball will be something really wonderful.
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