Okay RedHat,
I thought you'd be back, for it is late and I have been reading other stuff you have on other threads, I thought you were a woman.
I take it you are no longer with W?
I will try, one last time, I did have copies of En and Lbs to fill out I did this and asked him if he'd fill out one too. He refused.
I asked him if he'd at least read the one I filled out of how I felt.
He threw the papers in the pile of newspapers he had read to be thrown out. I felt good about filling out the forms. Like I have validation, as if I counted.
His bil did say this to me along time ago. He asked me if I counted, and said what about my feelings don't I count. I didn't know what to say to him. For I was going through this then too.
His bil said to me another time "your damned if you do and your damned if you don't." Which now I take that he meant, his wife (bf's sister) is the same way.
Are you happy now yourself? Are you with someone else better suited to you? I ask for I realized that you seem content with yourself, and I did not realize you are a man though, maybe I wonder now what brings you here? I do appreciate you doing all you have done in such a short time for me with all the info. I am impressed more so because you are a man!
He is a one way or the highway man, he has said this to me often enough. Disrespectful and I sure tell him I do stand up for me, yet it gets me no where. He wants what he wants. He can be cruel at times also.
Yet he was not always like that to me. I realize he is capable of it. I just want to be happy with someone to share my life with a one to one man.
I really don't want to live alone and live life as a woman who is always alone, how boring ....we have been through alot in the past four,five years. The past 3 have been no day at the beach and I feel it has been very hard to deal with as it is today with what has happened.
I have copied these forms and saved them. It was a hope to hang on to. One night a while back I wanted to talk to him about our love life. I waited til we returned home from his club. I was thinking positive and wanted to share this with him, he wouldn't let me finish, he cut me off quickly with, "Oh, no, you want to talk about it,(sex) his mind he just thinks just do it. I was hopeful that we would have a better experience for he was always a happy camper with me before.
Just let's not talk it out.....as if it was a dirty thing to do. I am descreet and a private person, I expected to be treated with respect. I have been with only him since we first met. I do not agree with cheating at all. I would not do that to anyone......so I feel I deserve the respect ......okay......I need to ask you are you a counselor here?
