OK ,this all is JMVHO .
I have children and I know alot here do to , While everything was going on (A) there are so many things to think about so many things that will change in your life if it should end up in DIVORCE .
ME PERSONALY , I belive that D does not have to be messy and it is the one thing I would and did truely BEG FWS for . To always remain friendly and if there was going to be OP then that should be social .
MY thoughts are my children are small and if someone is going to be around them , then they should be able to feel comfortable and basicly not scared .
I want them to know forgivness , I want them to know respect .
Yes I would have wanted to know the OP to an exstent I mean if your going to be with my chilren I want to know you .
If I hired a baby sitter wouldn't I want to be comfortable to know WHO they are .
Listen I am not saying I wanted to go shopping and do my nails with the B!tch but if she had to come with him to pick my kids up , or if they had a major function in there life and there dad was bringing her ,, yes I would want to be able to put my children at easy that there is no tention .
Divorce would be hard enough on kids I don't see why anyone would want to make it any harder .
NO bad mouthing , or disagreing over them . I wanted to know they would be raised the way we agreed . punishments , school work ect.
I would want the op to know that I could be social to her for my children and would expect the same in return ..
Making any sense yet ??
When I first went through this I did not have MB , I felt that once H admitted he had feeling for some one else thats it . I didn't know about FOG talk or anything like that .
TO me you say you love someone else thats it . I said, do you want to work on M , answer was I don't know then NO ..
SO I focused alot more on how can we stay freinds and how can I get past HATEING OW .
WELL thats hard , but knew I could do what ever it took for my kids ..
ONLY IF I had to be around her or talk to her I would .
Family functions ECT.
Thank the lord it never came to that , I never was around her , H never brought her any where .
HE allianed himself from everyone once I exposed the A .. EMBARESSED !!!