PAUL,<BR> I would take her back. Under conditions. Please remember that this is a "Tug of War" between Good and Evil. GOOD IS tugging, help pull her back. Take the others advice on how to "Hold your ground" GOOD LUCK AND MANY MANY PRAYERS!!! FRANK<P>------------------<BR>desperate<BR>"If yesterday didn't stop today, Why should TODAY stop tomorrow??" <BR>"Wisdom is why!!"<P>

She finally called and I pick her up in 1 1/2 hours.<P>I'm thinking of trying to get her to post here over the next few weeks so that you guys can help me help her through some of this. I realize that she may say things about me that I may not want you guys to know but as I've said before, my life is now an open book and I think your help would be more helpful than me not getting bashed.<P>Prayers to all.<P>------------------<BR>1Co:2:4: And my speech and my preaching was not with enticing words of man's wisdom, but in demonstration of the Spirit and of power:<BR>1Co:2:5: That your faith should not stand in the wisdom of men, but in the power of God.

Paul.... I am really praying for your success. I have just regained some hope for my own situation. I was feeling really low this morning, but this has helped boost my spirits. I am just hoping that I will be able to write the same kind of post in the future. <P>Keep up the good work, whatever you are doing seems to have helped.<P>God Bless you and yours,<BR>Sheryl W.

Paul,<BR>Maybe you should practice a little withdrawal also, if your wife starts to post.<P>Maybe only open your threads, and tell her not to give you her user name for a while. Then maybe we can be the best at helping her - at least initially, and you won't be tempted to defend yourself. <P>I do hope your wife does post here. We do care about her, you and the marriage.<P>TNT<P>You may want to do a search on the front page of marriage builders about "withdrawal". You'll get lots of information.<P>I have to say that I think this is the best site for dealing with infidelity, and suspect you were led here by God, as well as me. <P>God Bless<BR>Connie

Amen Connie and God Bless

Hi Paul<P>I'm sitting here with tears streaming down my face, just dying for the same thing to happen to me.<BR>I have questioned myself what I would do if he asks to come home.<BR>I hope I can trust my heart, my feelings and my intuition if/when that happens.<BR>If she will give OM up COMPLETELY, I think I would be prepared to let her home. If not, I couldn't set myself up for more heartache. The break has been made - you are obviously living apart, and for W to move back is a major step forward in my eyes. But you have to follow and trust your heart. You will know whether she is serious this time by her actions, her words and her demeanour. If you have one doubt, sort it out before W moves back. So easy to say from my little perch down here in Brisbane Australia and not being at that stage yet !! Who knows what I would do, but that is what I THINK I would do.<P>Hope it all works out, and I hope she's serious.<P>Jo

Paul,<P>It's all a leap of faith, because at this point she isn't 100% sure herself.<P>I guess I will offer one more thought (OK, in advance I will warn everybody NOT to beat me up with 50 lashes from raw bacon!):<P>Give her expectations of no contact with the OM, but also, let her know that it isn't the end of the world if she has slip ups - AS LONG AS SHE IS COMMITTED AND WORKING ON YOUR MARRIAGE. I wonder if some of our S's waffling is because they see themesleves a FAILURES when they try to break itoff and have slipups. Maybe that is why she has been in and out of the house/marriage 4 times??<P>If it was me, I'd take her back and take another chance on her, but I am the really optimistic and forgiving type.<P>Best of luck - who knows, maybe fourth time is a charm ?????????<P>Roll Me Away