You have the right to reclaim in a monetary way what is being lost. Exposure to her command and filing the appropriate paperwork is an option you can consider but do so under counsel, not this board. WE are not legal advisors.

However, filing these things to save your M is not a good reason. Why? Because your M must be saved because you and your H want to recover it.

Right now if your H is not in the pix but you are dealing with a WS, then to do the above s/b options for securing your future from further financial loss not martial recovery.

Basically you can't do much to the OW that will end the A. That needs to be on your H's part with the WS out of the pix.

Plan B allows you to distance yourself from the WS, while leaving the door open or shut to your H as YOU choose.

Reconsider the reasons for exposure and get your legal counsel's advice.

You may feel you are being pulled back and forth and you are. Just want to keep you focused and balanced.

Sorry for the roller coaster.....don't make it worse than it is but don't be complacement either.

L.

Edited because of potential lurkers

<small>[ December 27, 2004, 02:00 AM: Message edited by: fightingalone-again ]</small>

THought I would update this thread as I haven't kept thing together enough. I (of course <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> ) got the name and address of OW. Called her, made a formal complaint to the military and sent exposure letters to her sis.

And this is just the begiining. Between Dork's failure to consider DD12's feelings, I am just counting down the time til I go back to VIctoria. I have set up a first counselling session for me in Victoira. And then it will be OUR turn together.

Since he has agreed to counselling and also to stop contact with OW if the counsellor suggests it is necessary, we will see. ANd BTW, DOrk signed the agreement to abide with what the counsellor said. FID.

WHen I spoke to WH, he wanted to know where I was staying. I said I had a few places. He asked if I was staying where he is. I said maybe. He said he was uncomfortable with that. I asked him why? We're married. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> All innocent sounding. He said well you know why. YOu took letters of mine. I asked what letters? He said you know. I said I write a lot of letters. He said the one to OW's sis. I said Oh that. THere are more. And changed the subject. The got off the phone. Now he'll worry. Tough! He should.

<small>[ December 31, 2004, 09:02 PM: Message edited by: fightingalone-again ]</small>