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Where is this story of John and Sue by the way? Not something I can seem to find
BH(me) - 41
WW - 38
Separated kids live with me
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Where is this story of John and Sue by the way? Not something I can seem to find It’s in the book “Surviving an Affair” by Dr Harley. Let me see if I can find other Plan B stories for BHs to link for you.
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Have you seen Steps to Take to Survive Infidelity ? At the very least, watch the video at the beginning.
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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I just purchased the ebook for Surviving an Affair
BH(me) - 41
WW - 38
Separated kids live with me
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I just purchased the ebook for Surviving an Affair Good it’s a very easy and fast read and has a wealth of information. Let us know what you think.
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Posts: 29
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There are similarities in the Jon and Sue story, but not the same at all. However there are so many signs of behavior that fits on her end.
She came and took the kids out for dinner Sunday night, and the kids told me she was crying on them in the parking lot of the restaurant.
She also told them that things were so much harder for her than she thought, that she's moving from her apartment to be a roommate with another woman(not AP, have confirmed this).
Parents of OM still haven't read my messages, they don't seem active often on FB. I contacted friends of theirs to hopefully get them to read sooner rather than later.
BH(me) - 41
WW - 38
Separated kids live with me
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So are you still planning on starting Plan B? Have you had any contact with her? It sounds like maybe the affair is crumbling, but is she’s still in contact with OM then you can bet it is still on.
Can you find a phone number for OM’s parents and call them?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Again no, no contact with her, I would be breaching the no contact order from the charges she had falsely laid against me. Even still I wouldn't be contacting her at this point, it's been far easier on me emotionally and mentally to not do so. I don't get where the idea that Plan A is possible for Men for upwards of a year either, I would lose my mind.
I have never met this guy, she met him online...so don't even know any of his family, and I was only able to find out who his parents were with someone elses help. Still waiting for them or their friends to read my messages on Facebook, they're not very active users.
I lawyered up today for the purpose of getting custody of the kids and having her pay child support, ball is rolling.
BH(me) - 41
WW - 38
Separated kids live with me
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Biggest problem with trying to contact people on Facebook, is messages get filtered as spam...I'm not sure I'll ever reach them
BH(me) - 41
WW - 38
Separated kids live with me
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Biggest problem with trying to contact people on Facebook, is messages get filtered as spam...I'm not sure I'll ever reach them Can you look up their name to get their phone number to call them?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,439 Likes: 4
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And yes Dr. Harley tells most BHs to Plan A up to a year and BWs up to 3 weeks. But he says everyone is different and if a BH feels they can’t do it for as long a year that he will give advice to shorten the Plan A time.
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Posts: 29
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I tried looking them up to get phone numbers and no listings for them, so either unlisted or they only have cell phones.
Also found them on Instagram and sent messages there, which at least should give them a notification of it unlike Facebook...if they ever get on it again.
At this point I think I just have to just keep moving forward with the legal end for custody and support, stay dark with her and hope they see my message.
BH(me) - 41
WW - 38
Separated kids live with me
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Posts: 29
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I sent off a Plan B letter today mainly along the lines of the sample but edited to fit the situation.
She has maintained that separation means she wasn't cheating or had started an affair, so it's likely to fall on deaf ears.
If she wasn't though, why would she feel the need to hide him from the world? Even when I first found out she demanded to know how I found out his name, because the only person that knew was this new toxic best friend according to her.
BH(me) - 41
WW - 38
Separated kids live with me
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,439 Likes: 4
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She is having an affair. She can spin it all she likes, but she is a married woman with children and she is having an affair.
Do you have an IM and a plan for children for pick up and drop offs to where you don’t see her at all?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,439 Likes: 4
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,439 Likes: 4 |
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Joined: Sep 2022
Posts: 29
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Joined: Sep 2022
Posts: 29 |
Kids are old enough to arrange things themselves, 11 and two 17 year olds. There is no reason for her to contact me, even though she's kind of been back to relaying random messagea about things that don't matter at all via the kids, I'm strong enough to completely ignore them and I've informed the kids to tell her they will not relay messages anymore.
No IM, if things come round to needing one I will do that , but I don't need one as of yet.
Last edited by kenmw; 09/17/22 06:42 PM.
BH(me) - 41
WW - 38
Separated kids live with me
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,439 Likes: 4
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Have you seen a lawyer yet?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Joined: Sep 2022
Posts: 29
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OP
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Just getting the ball rolling with that, I have one but it isn't a quick process.
BH(me) - 41
WW - 38
Separated kids live with me
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Joined: Sep 2022
Posts: 29
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I have friends and family telling me the Plan B letter is a mistake and just gives her the idea that because I still love her she can keep doing what she's doing and just come back when it pleases her... because she knows I still care.
BH(me) - 41
WW - 38
Separated kids live with me
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,439 Likes: 4
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Can you post your Plan B letter so we can see?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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