lostva -- Thank You very much. As I read your response, I found myself starting to cry.<P>We Love You too.<P>God Bless

ES:<P>I just now got to see this post. Don't know how I missed it, but I'm glad it's back!<P>I'd just like to tell you that I really can empathize with you on this one. We're fast approaching the one-year anniversary of D-Day with Petunia's affair. It'll be March 21.<P>To add insult to injury, my B-Day is a week from tomorrow . . . . my 30th B-day. I know, I know, it's not THAT bad. But, y'all remember how you felt when you turned 30?<P>There's a little excitement, but there's also a little trepidation . . . a little feeling of loss, like I can't act like a kid anymore, cuz I'm 30 now! <P>Anyhoo, I'm a little bummed, and will be over the next few weeks, because Petunia's affair is now forever linked to the same general time as my birthday. Every time I get a year older, I'll be reminded of what happened last year.<P>Not the most uplifting news, but I did just want to tell you, ES, that I empathize with your feelings. You're not wrong to have those feelings and triggers. Just remember the important thing: Hopeful is with YOU now. She's back, just like Petunia is back with me.<P>There will always be a little pang of betrayal. There will always be the reminder that your innocence is "lost." But, happiness, my friend, is a state of mind, and you have to CHOOSE to rise above the triggers and reminders.<P>When I start feeling this way, I remember that I should be THANKFUL. I could be divorced right now. I could have an unremorseful spouse. In the grand scheme of things, I got off lightly, and I still have a marriage, and for THAT, I am eternally grateful.<P>Keep THAT in mind, my friend. Focus on the good, not the bad. You can do it!<P>------------------<BR>/// Lone Star * ///<P>

I just wanted everyone to know that I LOVE ES and will always be here. I am truely sorry for what I didn't and will do everything I can to help him get through his triggers.<P>Lone Star - I actually don't know how it feels to turn 30. I'm only 29 and won't have a birthday until next January. How does it feel to turn 30 anyway?

I can't believe it. A thread which I started has caught fire. <P><BR>Lone Star -- My dear friend. I want to thank you my friend. You insight into my own mind through all of this truly amazes me sometimes.<P>You are of course completely correct in your observations concerning me and my emotions through all of this.<P>Now as for your pending graduation to "true" adulthood . . . You're going to be 30 It must be terrible for you to finally reach this wonderous milestone.<P>It may be a little early . . . But let me be the first to wish you a Very Happy Birthday.

Hopeful:<P>Turning 30 doesn't feel much different than any other birthday. It just has this MILESTONE quality attached to it. I guess it's this expectation that I oughta act more adult now, since I will no longer be a "kid."<P>Kind of a weird feeling.<P>------<P>ES:<P>Thanks for the B-Day wishes. It's officially March 16, but I'll take early wishes too!<P>Glad I could be helpful to you in your recovery. (Yes, I would say you and Hopeful are a success story!) Ya just have to keep working at it. It IS worth it.<P>Believe it or not, YOU have been just as helpful to me. Knowing the similarities of our stories, it's been great having somebody here who knows precisely what I'm feeling.<P>I gotta tell you, even if my marriage hadn't survived, it would have been worth it to be here to meet you and Hopeful and all the other wonderful people whom I now consider my friends.<P>------------------<BR>/// Lone Star * ///<P>

Back to the top once more for Sheba to read.<P>God Bless