Hi Mental,<P>I did not read all the replies, because I just have a few short minutes online.<P>I think that just happened to someone else this week, similar anyway. It was either Woozy or Mitzi. Our stories are so similar, I mix us all up sometimes! But, I do have some advice.<P>Well, not advice, its something my crazy H told me. He told me that men pray on women who are vulnerable. If they are looking for an affair, and want sex, they target a woman who is unbalanced or vulnerable. This is the easiest because they believe what you tell them. He told me this because he is worried someone will target me. I feel this is how he targeted OW. Either way its a snake giving me his insight, so take it as you will.<P>I think that is horrible, these people are your friends. I can't say I know what to do. I might try to let it go first and save the evidence. You really don't want to tell the wife do you, she will be crushed. You already know how she'll feel. Plus, if the kids are friends. same neighborhood, etc. <P>I can't believe the world right now. Nothing but affairs, betrayers, and pain. I am so disappointed , I had big plans for this year.<P>Talk to you soon! Dana<BR>

If the picture included his face as well as his privates, I'd print it out, make copies and post it around the neighborhood.<P>But I suspect that he just found something that looked impressive by his standards and sent it on to you.<P>I don't think you should tell his wife, when you avoid them for a while she will probably figure it out. My MIL went through this after she was widowed. Yes there are men out there who see possible vulnerablity and try to take advantage. There are also men out there who see vulverablity and try to protect. Unfortunately the former are more obvious.<P>Take care.

Nancy,<BR> Perhaps you could start a chain letter,including this wonderful picture.You know;Send this to 10 friends,and your luck will double,if they sent it on to 10 more friends,your luck will triple.Just a thought.You better stay away from this weirdo.Who knows what he'll do next.Guys like this give men a bad name. --Murph

Mental, sorry that you had to meet such a person. Sad thing is he is looking for an escape from his marriage. We can all joke and think about what to do with the picture but deep down. I think that it's sad... another marriage is about to go on the rocks.<P>Thats what I see. Maybe it's not to late for them. If you know them well maybe you should talk to his W and see if she is noticing anything. Help if you can... Through all my troubles and nightmares... I see a couple people learning from my failed (so far) marriage. My brother and his wife, and another couple. They saw what has happened.. remembered my W saying that she couldn't be happier.. and everything was perfect. And now, shes not here.. shes with another.<P>Try to help another couple if possible. If noone learns its a horrible thing. If someone can... at least you can say that you helped save another marriage. I think that is what counts. I miss the commitment, I miss the love and I miss her. If I could prevent even 2 people from experiencing my bad and horrible dream it is worth it in my eyes.<P>See what you can do. Please<P>James

Well I talked to his wife. She called this morning. Said that H went out last Saturday to a bar to watch sports and have a couple beers. Well for the first time in their marriage she went to look for him. Found him right where he said he would be......but he was sitting with another woman....at a booth.....backs to the door.....eating. She said she was shaking. It really hurt her. She has been suspecting for a long time that he is cheating on her. Well I told her about his e-mails and then I started to cry. I told her about the picture. She wants to see it. Told her it could have been anyone and that I have agonized over telling her and that maybe he just thought he was being funny but that now I really don't think that we can meet for our weekly dinner...I'm just too embarassed. I asked her if her H wears boxers....YES....asked her if he had some that are such and such color and design....YES. It was him. She kept apologizing...told her she has nothing to apologize for. That I hoped she wasn't mad at me....no. Now I feel bad. Knew I would...but also knew I would feel bad if I didn't tell her. I'm not sure the position it puts her in, or their marriage. I just know that I would have wanted to know. She said that she will never tell him she knows. She is taking everything slowly. Has been for months. I assured her that there is nothing going on between him and me and that I would never do that. She believed me and understood.<P>Thanks<BR>Nancy