Just another update...<P>My W did call the priest last night...<BR>...and after a few words being exchanged... she threatened the priest with her contacting the Diocesan Bishop regarding the matter... <BR>(soap-opera like... ughhhhh)<BR>...threats (mostly directed at me about court matters) have become a way of life for my W...<P>The priest still is hopeful that my W will not bring the OM...<BR>...but it is clear <B>to me</B>... she will bring him... <P>The priest said he would try and be <I>civil</I> (at DRE's repeated requests)...<BR>...but if the OM comes... that some words of admonishment must be said.<P>Since I was helping with the final practice yesterday... I couldn't help noticing the times through the service where<BR>...the holiness of "family unity"...<BR>...the "gift of life from mommy and daddy"...<BR>...the reflection of baptismal promises to be brought up faithfully <I>by mom and dad</I>... and<BR>...the "gift of family togetherness"...<BR>were brought out in word and song...<P>Hearing these words again on Saturday will tug at my spirits... <BR>...maybe more so than any "civil admonishment" the priest may give. <P>At the practice yesterday...<BR>...one of the mother's of another communicant (a mother who co-taught at CCD with my W for a few years)... was so distraught when she heard about the OM attending... <P>Seating arrangements will make the OM presence very close to everyone... my family... W's family... <P>I will... to the best of my ability... make this a 'good' memory for my daughter! <BR>She deserves nothing less. <P>---------------------------------------------<P>This morning I got a very simple e-mail...<BR>"get the kid's stuff ready tonight"...<P>This night is a "dining out"(formal dinner) for my son... it's his last year in the AF Jr. ROTC program...<BR>...and again the OM will be there too...<BR>(we'll be seated at different... and distant tables though)<P>And when it is over for the guests... 9:30-10:30PM... she will take the 2 younger ones back with her (a bit over a 1.5 hour drive)...<BR>...since it is her weekend with them...<BR>...and then bring them back (a bit under a 2 hour drive) in the morning for or D's First Holy Communion in the morning...<P>Afterwards...<BR>...my W won't stay for any reception...<BR>...she has to leave on a "business trip"...<BR>...so at least I get the kids for the rest of 'her' weekend.<P>---------------------------------------------<P><B>Bill</B>...<BR>I can't finish without responding back to you...<BR>My W has seen virutally no consequences to her actions yet... (courts system siding her way)<BR>...this... may be the first <B>real</B> consequence she sees... <P>Thank you... gentleman Bill <P>---------------------------------------------<P>I know all your thoughts and prayers will be with me and my D tomorrow... [img]http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/images/icons/smile.gif[/img]<P>God Bless you all... abundantly.<P>Jim

Not sure what going to the bishop would do...<P>She could go all the way up to the pope, and my bet would be that he would admonish her. The catholic church is pretty strict on this. I'm kind of surprised she hasn't been excommunicated. The priest who married us limited the amount of pictures taken at the alter because he wasn't Catholic. He also wasn't too happy we were marrying at all.<P>This present darkness is about a priest who tries to save his church from the forces of evil. There are all kinds of demons that attach themselves to the backs of weak, but generally good people. The little demon image struck me because of the obscenities she throws out. In the book one of the demons likes to do this. He actually whispers in the persons ear and kind of controls what they say. Not that this will have much of a therapeutic effect, but I thought you might find the book interesting. It's a good piece of fiction.

Jim, <P>OOPS. I missed the boat. I wrote a post looking forward to the first communion, then noticed it was last weekend!<P>What happened?????<P>I was all for your priest calling her and OM to repentance, btw.<P>Love, <P>Karenna<P>------------------<BR>A true friend is one who not only is willing to love us the way we are, but is able to leave us better than he found us.

Thank you for your words...<P><B>beth28</B>...<BR>Actually... according to the head of the diocesan Directors of Religious Education... if the priest had carried out his admonishment in full.. he could have been reprimanded... and (I don't know how, but) there could have even been been "legal" ramifications to his actions. I'll will be finding out what some of those ramifacitions would have been... in 2 weeks.<P><B>Karenna</B>...<BR>Thank you... it did work out alright!<P>follow-up/closure see ===><A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum28/HTML/002758.html" TARGET=_blank>Joy and a big sigh of relief...</A>.<P> <P>Jim

hi jim. ive been gone awhile, but im glad to hear you are still handling yourself well and being a great father <BR>julie<BR>ps, my folks have been divorced 20 years, and now my dad lives with my mom 3 days a week for commuting purposes (and my mom is great friends with his first wife!!!) you just never lose people from your life, so you might as well make the best of it, and long distance plan A sounds like a great plan.

Maybe slander of some sort. The catholic church has changed quite a bit in the last couple of years to keep its members and stay current, but their are still some churches and priests that hold to the old fire and brimstone philosophy. The church we started marital planning with even had a lutheran consultant who worked with them, and had no problems with interfaith marriages. (A lutheran and a catholic practically wasn't an interfaith marriage in their book) My priest back home begrudgingly carried through with the marriage, but not before all kinds of oaths got taken, and he still viewed my husband as a bit of a wayward sheep. <P>My guess though is that adultery is still a big whamee (I started attending Lutheran services after marriage so I can't say for sure.) While the catholic church may not condone dangling its members over the precipice of he double hockey sticks they don't view adultery from its members very favorably either. The Pope still doesn't condone birth control. Like I said, I'm surprised a quiet excommunication hasn't taken place. That may be coming yet.

<B>loveWASblind=lWb</B>...<BR>I'm not sure what kind of relationship my W and I can have...<BR>...after we divorce<BR>...and her almost definite remarriage to the OM<BR>...even before I can get to do a Plan B... <P>I don't think it will be in the realm of "good friends"...<BR>...but there will be something there... for the benefit of the kids!<P>There will NEVER be any "friend" relationship between me and the OM...<BR>...just my acceptance of him as a child of God... who I will continue to love in a christian way.<P><B>beth28</B>...<BR>I am a cradle Catholic... but with the cable channel's EWTN programming I am learning alot of other (mostly) Christian faiths... The two closest to the Catholic faith would be the Lutheran and some Evangelical Anglican faiths. My MIL is Lutheran... but my FIL(God rest his soul) was strictly Catholic. In fact I know of a Lutheran community in PA that is in it's entirey converting over to Catholicism... partly due to no Lutheran minister being available to them. I heard about this at a church... on my ski trip... the one where I had my appendicitis!<P>I know most peole will think thay my priest is a traditional... old-fashioned... pre-vatican II... kind of priest...<BR>Well... surprise...<BR>The hour after the Communion Services were over... he had administered (in the same church building) at the wedding of a couple from North Carolina (we are in New Jersey)... and only one of the parties were Catholic...<BR>He is one of the few priest's in the diocese that will perform these types of inter-faith marriages regularly!<P>Yes... adultery is a big whamee in the Catholic church...<BR>Not <B>divorce</B>...<BR>But... adultery is!!!<BR>However... excommunication... is <B>very</B> rarely used today. From my understanding... it is only used when former Catholics in very high positions (morally usually... Catholic colleges/seminaries/etc.)... preach the "evils of the Cathloic faith." It is <B>very</B> uncommon...<P>...and unless my W were to make a public grandstanding of this and much more...<BR>...there is no chance of excommunication what so ever...<P>divorce... aldultery... murder... coveting etc.<BR>don't get you excommunicated!<P>There is always the chance for "repentance"...<BR>...and the church will accept it!<P>That's why... when my priest ended his homily ... with (Matthew 18:6)/(Mark 9:42)/(Luke 17:2)<BR>"And if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to be thrown into the sea with a large millstone tied around his neck."<BR>(instead of any chastising my W for bringing the OM)<BR>...the priest showed his understanding of what is really important to the Chruch...<BR>...living the life in Christ's footsteps...<BR>...and for the children to see that!<P>Whewwww...<P> <P>Jim