David,<P>It's good you love her...<BR>Now both of you have to stop... breathe... take a <B>very</B> short time apart...<P>And then, let love take over...<BR>No word of 'divorce' allowed for a least a week... in any of your conversations!<BR>No <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi3400_lovebust.html" TARGET=_blank>Love Busters</A> at all...<P>Sit down... and realize... one important thing...<BR>The divorce process is <B>10X</B> the work you need to put into fixing this more than viable marriage!<P>You are both admired for coming to the forum... Both sides of a story (heck... the 3 or 4 sides that there sometimes are) are important. Turn our admiration... into your support... <P>Jim<BR>---------------------------------<BR>Where two or more are gathered...

nsr. Thank you for responding. Can I say that I am not asking for a D but if we must part, only to separate. I fear however this may cause more damage than good. I dont want a D. I am very sorry for the many mistakes I have made and wish God could give me a new start. I am feeling better about life and thank God for that. I regret W does want a D and its scary. I feel I should leave as to give her peace and maybe she would be happy. Anyway it seems too late to stop this tidal wave from its destruction so "run for safety" somehow it feels right and wrong at the same time?

3Wishes,<P>I am going to tell you the same thing I told your wife. Don't make any decisions you don't have too. You both are very tired both physically and mentally. You don't have to fix your marriage right now. Just let it be and work on getting her physical problems taken care of and you getting rest. Just treat each other with the respect that you would give any friend who is down and trying hard. Kindnesss, understanding, and not taking anything they say to seriously because you know they are down. <P>3Wishes, just take time and heal. This has been a long tough road. You both need time to just sit and rest. I feel if you do your love for each other will overcome the anger and frustration you have for each other. <P>I told Sheryl that she should practice listening and understanding what you say. I think you should do the same. Once one of you has said something the other should repeat what they heard. I know it sounds like a game from camping out, but you and W will be very surprised how often you misinterpreted what the other said.<P>However, before that just rest.<P>God Bless You and Your Family<P>JL