When I first came here I read I believe SHA's post about taking a break to work on things at home, I didn't understand then but I do now. Time has come for me to step back from the board, the everyday hustle, the world...and work on my situation a little more.<P>My W has been home for 4 weeks on Friday, 12/10/99. I could probably count it down to hours and minutes if needed. The whole situation has had a resounding affect on me and my way of life.<P>God has brought me pretty low through this ordeal. Four weeks ago before she came home the Lord had finally lifted a great weight from my heart and I felt such peace that I was dumbfounded. I was able to help others and receive what others here were telling me with a clear head and open heart. Over the past four weeks I feel that I have become complacent in my search for the Lord (SHA!) So I am taking this break to renew my fury and fevor for the Lord.<P>I also am taking a break because I do not feel that I am helping anyone. I read posts sometimes and see the pain that people are going through, I feel the suffering, and find myself at a complete loss of words. I see posts of those who have been here for such a long time, SHA,Wex,TNT,NSR, even Maya , and too many others to name. Plus I see new names every day. All I can do is shake my head and read on. Often we question why we are made to endure such things, and the truth is we may never know.<P>My W and I are at a place where we have not been for a while. We both see the love we have for each other but are afraid to express it. We see the hurt we cause and struggle to change the actions that cause it. I am constantly battling distrust and she is battling dishonesty. These are the things we must overcome.<P>I have decided to have a day of prayer and fasting for myself and those here. Friday, 12/10/99 I will fast the entire day while asking the Lord to strengthen my brothers and sisters in their time of need. Anyone here that wishes to join me in doing this is fo course welcome. Jesus fasted forty days and forty nights, I do not compare, but wish to do my part.<P>Thanks for helping me through all these times and thanks for helping me through whatever happens in the furture. <P>If anyone needs me or has anything specific next week feel free to email me.<BR>pmoyers2@mindspring.com<P>Prayers and God Bless.<P>------------------<BR>1Co:2:4: And my speech and my preaching was not with enticing words of man's wisdom, but in demonstration of the Spirit and of power:<BR>1Co:2:5: That your faith should not stand in the wisdom of men, but in the power of God.<P>

Paul, <P>My good friend. I have been thinking the same thoughts as you in regards to stepping back, again (I'll post my own thread). You've helped me realize it's something I need to do too. And now is the time.<P>Of course, you can add me to the list of fasters. One day is not asking much. And it seems like the right thing to do.<P>Paul, you're a good man. I read your post to Dr. K and I didn't know your wife was pregnant from the OM. Gosh, sometimes my problems seem to pale in comparison to what some of you struggle with. <P>I'm with you Paul. I'll hold on to your email address to stay in touch. <P>God Bless you and your wife. <P>Your Brother in Christ, <P>SHA

Paul - do what you need to do. Remember that we are here for you if you ever should need us. And we could use your wisdom and faith from time to time as well.<P>You will remain in my prayers.<P>Lori

I would like to fast with you, Paul.<BR>

Paul,<P>Remain strong. You are doing the right thing. HE will take care of you. God bless you.

Paul,<BR>I will certainly miss you. I am glad though for the reason of your stepping back. I do not post as much as I did. Sometimes the pain the new one are going through is too much to deal with. I am trying to deal with going on with my life. But I am so glad that your W is back with you and has been for four weeks. You need all your strength and energy spent not on others at this time but on you and your W and your relationship. You both will be in my prayers. Do post from time to time just to keep us updated. And lurk at time to see how us old timers are doing so you too can rejoice when we make progress. {{{{HUGS}}} <P>------------------<BR>di<P>

Paul...<P>We all understand...<BR>For those who haven't been here that long... in time they too... will understand.<P>Step back...<BR>Give God a bit more of your time...<P>This is the time to stop the talking...<BR>And get to work... building...<BR>A carpenter doesn't build with his voice...<P>Paul... I thank you for all the help you've given me. And I know there are others out there who you have helped immeasurably.<P>Take Him into your heart... when the work becomes a bit too hard... when the results don't come as fast as you'd like... when it feels like the cross you bear is a little heavier.<P>God... I love you man... <BR>Words can't say it all...<P>I'll be thinking of you at your Christmas play... <BR>Even as I am putting on ours (yep... I'm the director/producer of ours... oh well...)<BR>Putting on Christ will mean so much for you this Christmas... <P>If you haven't checked it out yet... before you leave... one of my latest posts may help a little.. <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum1/HTML/010574.html" TARGET=_blank>Friends... The Wings of Faith</A>.<P>God loves you... and <B>you</B> know it!<BR>We love you... and <B>you</B> know it!<BR>Now... find the love for <B>yourself</B> and your <B>beloved wife</B>. <P>Jim<BR>------------------<BR>I can dare myself... I'll put a pebble in my shoe...<BR>I can walk... I can walk! I shall call the pebble Dare...<BR>Dare shall be carried... And when we both have had enough<BR>I will take him from my shoe, singing... "Meet your new road!"...<BR>Finally glad... Finally glad... That you are here... By my side...

Paul,<P>I certainly know where you are coming from. I have made progress with my situation as well. I come back to see how my friends are doing. It saddens me to see the hurt, pain and suffering that is still here on the forum.<P>Please do not forget us as we will not forget you. Keep us posted.<P>Wishing you and your the Best.<P>Medic<BR>

Paul,<BR>I am going to miss you. You certainly may email me if you like mncon99@yahoo.com<P>I am so pleased with your progress, and I agree it is time to take a break.<P>I will be joining you on your fast tomorrow, and I will agree in prayer with you that the Lord will divinely intervene for your friends here on MB - especially the ones you mentioned in your post. <P>God Bless You, Paul and your wife.<BR>TNT

Paul, Wishing you all the best. Take care of yourself & Merry Christmas.<P>Email me if you need/want to chrisca@pcisys.net <P>------------------<BR>Prayers & God Bless!<BR>Chris<BR>For relationship info check out <A HREF="http://www.pcisys.net/~chriscal1/resources.html" TARGET=_blank>Marriage & Relationship Resources</A><p>[This message has been edited by Chris (CA123) (edited December 09, 1999).]

Paul - I think it's great that you're going to fast for a day tomorrow. I wish and hope that this will bring much clarity to you. I'm very sorry to see you go, as I've much appreciated your advice and thoughts on threads I've started, and the fact that our situations (like SHA's and some other) are similar has helped too. We'll be losing two of our most stalwart advocates (you and SHA) of continuing to try and save a marriage even when there doesn't seem to be a lot of hope. Now in your situation, it looks like hope has returned. You have all my best wishes for a continued restoration of love between you and your W. Hopefully you (and SHA) will visit us now and then to let us know how things are going. Regards, blessings and best of luck,<P>--Wex

Best wishes, Paul...<P>You're one of the good guys!<P>~Sheryl

Good luck Paul and you will be missed. I understand your thoughts completely. I think there is a time for all of us when we need to step away from here for a time to be determined by God.<P>Thanks for all the advise you have given the many people here. <P>You are a great guy and I have learned from you too.<P>Your fasting is such a wonderful thing. Thank you in advance for that too.<P>You will be in my thoughts and prayers. May God's peace be with you and with your spirit.<P>------------------<BR>God bless you and all of us.<P>Samantha<BR>

God bless you, Paul, and best of luck with your marriage. I'm rooting for you.

Well the time has come to sign off this wonderful place. I will be back at some point. I just pray that it is with good news. <P>SHA: I replied to your post so I'll keep this short...This is twice you've stated I've helped you. And that means alot coming from you. Keep the faith, and remember, I'm the one sitting in the ashes beside you, praying.<P>lostva: This is one place that I will not forget. Thanks.<P>Maya: I actually got a little mushy when I saw your one line reply. Thanks<P>sidney: Him taking care of me is what I'm banking on.<P>SDS: I noticed you haven't posted alot, I guess this can be tough when you read all the posts of new "sufferers". I will try and focus on my relationship. And I will keep you updated and check on the ol' fogeys <P>NSR: Hey man, I guess it should be thanking you for the help, if I've helped you any then that makes it even better. You made me smile when you mentioned the play, I'm suprised anyone remembered. My part has grown from a silent walk up "the hill" to actually crying out "My God, My God, why hast thou forsaken me?" I almost choke and my voice cracks every time we rehearse.<P>Medic238: If anyone has made people here laugh it is you. 'pound sand up..." to this day I double over just thinking of it. Perhaps this is your calling, to heal through humor. Besides, you're good at it.<P>TNT: You were the first one here that got me going. I am in your debt. I read your post and sent you an email. I'm glad you will be praying for me, but save some of it for you.<P>Chris: Merry Christmas to you too my friend. Hope everything works out about the job thing. Let me know if I can help.<P>Wexwill: Hope has returned. You guys helped me see that it never left. You guys helped me see it. And you are not losing anything, as people here leave more follow, and then others step up to take their place. I don't think I had quite the "audience" that some have, but if I've helped anyone then that is worth alot to me.<P>new_beginning: I'm trying. <P>Samantha-MI: I haven't responded to people like I've wanted to for reasons in my original post, but if I can do something for someone to repay my debt, then I'm more than happy to.<P>K: I guess you are the one closest to my situation and I've relied on alot of what you have said. I will probably be in contact with you again as time goes on. Actaully you can count on it.<P>For all that are joining the day of praying and fasting, thank you, it means alot. Seek and ye shall find. We are all seeking and will continue to do so. Let's just not get upset if God doesn't let us find what we're looking for, but instead be thankful that we find what He was looking for. Our heart and lives for Him.<P>Till we meet again my brothers and sisters in Christ.<P>Paul<P>------------------<BR>1Co:2:4: And my speech and my preaching was not with enticing words of man's wisdom, but in demonstration of the Spirit and of power:<BR>1Co:2:5: That your faith should not stand in the wisdom of men, but in the power of God.<P>

Paul,<P>I am late getting her and I am really hoping that you will see my post.<P>Yes, there has been a lot of pain posted here since right before Thanksgiving, but I have also seen God working in the lives of many here, too.<P>You and your wife need time to fortify yourselves spiritually so you will have more to give to each other. The Lord is calling His lambs, and you must heed that call.<P>I will be thinking of you, your W, your children and this new baby. You have been such a shining example to so many here, Paul, including me.<P>Wishing you and yours the VERY BEST that life has to offer. And do let us hear from you every now and then. You will certainly be missed, but never forgotten!!!!<P>Roll me Away <P>------------------<BR>"Life is made up, not of great sacrifices or duties, but of little things in which smiles and kindnesses and small obligations, given habitually, are what win and preserve the heart and secure comfort."<P>Sir Humphry Davy<BR>

Paul,<BR> I think the same of you as I do SHA.<BR>I wish you the same Blessings and I know you will be refreshed in the Lord.<P>Thanks for your help!<P>God Bless<P>Bob

Hi Paul -<P>I'm late also, but I had to wish you and your Wife all the best!!!!<P>God is there with you and will aid you in overcoming your distrust as well as your Wife and her Dishonesty.....He will help with everything!!!!<P>We're always here for you and make sure to pop up every now and then - we need those success stories!!!!<P>HUGS,<P>Sheba

Good Luck Paul, Maybe you'll read this when you come back with the GOOD NEWS that will give us hope!! You are remarkable in my book!! God Bless, FRANK

Paul, I will miss you, but I understand where you are right now.<P>Blessings, thanks for your help.<P>Do come back to check on us all.<P>liz\POGP<P>------------------<BR><BR>"I have found the Pearl of Great Price"<BR>