I will miss you.<P>Just that, my friend.<P>~Sheryl

As a person who has severed all bonds with my ex except the children, but managed to do that with very little conflict and a fairly good post marriage relationship, I can probably give you some advice on that too. (Kudos to my ex for acting sane too.) #1 is read everything at <A HREF="http://www.divorceinfo.com." TARGET=_blank>www.divorceinfo.com.</A> <P>Good luck, and remember: "A happy parent makes for happy kids." Heal yourself and they will follow along. Allow yourself to become emotionally arrested, and they will be emotionally arrested at exactly the same place as you.<P>I don't know where you live, but where I am there is lots of snow on them ski hills, lots of ladies in the dance clubs, indoor soccer all winter and outdoor soccer all summer, and good friends all around. There is a life out there outside of all the **** you have been putting up with. You'll see that one day soon.<BR>

David,<P>I almost missed this post! My eyes have tears in them as I type - with only 3 fingers, remember? <P>I love your moniker -Sir Hurts Alot - a noble man with noble aspirations. A true knight with purest heart.....<P>You have reached a time for a well deserved rest in your struggle - and you will turn all this over to the One who is better able to lead and guide the outcome.... You and your marriage will be in VERY good hands, David.<P>How this will all end, I can not say. But I can say this with absolute truth and conviction - there is scarecly a better man than you, David!!!!! Your wife has the "pot of gold" from the end of the rainbow sitting next to her and she does not even recognize it. A real pity and a true tragedy.....<P>Please do take some time for yourself. You have invested so much with so little in return. David, I wish you only joy, peace and happiness in your heart!!!!!! I know someday, somewhere you will find a love to treasure who will DESERVE a man like you... a woman who will feel that she is the LUCKIEST woman on earth....a woman that will feel loved like NO other woman has felt.... and I really hope that woman is your WIFE.<P>God bless you, David, and do give us a post after a while to let us know you are ok.<P>With sincere friendship,<P>Desiree<P>------------------<BR>"Life is made up, not of great sacrifices or duties, but of little things in which smiles and kindnesses and small obligations, given habitually, are what win and preserve the heart and secure comfort."<P>Sir Humphry Davy<BR>

I think we all have to face this pulling back at sometime or another. Letting go and giving your marriage to God is a good thing, just remember God always answers us it maybe an answer that we don't want to hear though. I will continue to keep you in my prayers. And if you ever feel the need to vent or anything remember we are always here for you. Good luck.<P>------------------<BR>di<P>

SHA,<P>So long for now.<BR>It's good to know you are in good hands.<BR>As long as I keep Christ in the driver seat all will be well.<P>I foget who said it, it doesn't realy matter what they said that they did was, asking God to forgive them for try to do His job for Him.<P>I recently purchased abook called " Hope For The Separated," by Gary Chapman. It is loaded with scripture and how to deal with things. He talks about praying for a wayward spouce. He say to pray for the specific owrk of the Holy Spirit in the life of your spouce. You should pray that God will effect a deep sence of guilt for her sin; that He will impart a genuine awareness of what it means to be righteous(right); and an understanding of the reality of judgement to come upon those who don't repent. Such praying is in keeping with what we know to be the work of the Holy Spirit. God will answer that prayer.<P>Keep the faith God will take care of you.<P>Thank you for all of your encouragement.<BR>You'll be in my prayers.<P>Brothers in Christ,<P>Bill<P>------------------<BR>BB<BR>

SHA/David,<P>I always love seeing your posts. It seems liek you guys here are the few "guys" that can understand what I'm going thru. <P>Not to say the women here don't but it that "feelings" thing that they have and I sometimes(?) have trouble relating to.<P>Please hang in there and best of luck and do turn it all over to the Lord. When I try to handle it myself, that is when I suffer the most pain.<P>God Bless<P>Bob

Hi SHA<BR>Well I am sure we will still see you around once you have sorted things out you will be very missed, thank you for all the help and support you have given me I will continue to e mail you.(if you don't mind)All the best for Christmas to and yours. May the new year bring you all the happiness that you need/want in your life you are a great man I hope that your wife will see that soon (the sooner the better)(((((SHA))))) What else can I say? See you around cowboy !!!!<P>Hugs<BR>Jenny<P>------------------<BR>Where have all the cowboys gone ?<BR>Paula Cole<P><BR>

Sir Hurts Alot,<P>I've been in MB for only a week that seems like years not only for the pain but also for all the supportive words and ecouraging thoughts that I've found here. I can say that your posts are inspiring and full of wisdom- they have been surely a guiding light.<P>God will guide you through this... you will find happiness, you deserve it.<P>Thank you for all your teachings.<P>Alex<P>------------------<BR>If someone hurts you, betrays you or breaks your heart, forgive them because they have helped you learn about Trust and Awareness.

David,<P>I am sad to say goodbye, but I understand your need to move on. I, too, am getting on with life, although for now my story is different from yours in that h. is here and we are trying to find love again.<P>I post less and read less than before, because it hurts to keep remembering what happened. I think the Lord wants to heal my memories, and picking the scabs doesn't help very much.<P>The ladies that post to the Bible study have become a true source of support and teaching for each other.<P>Maybe you betrayed guys should start a book study or prayer circle too. I find that posting and reading there is much less painful than reliving infidelity over and over...just a thought.<P>{{{DAVID}}}<P>liz/His Pearl of Great Price<P>------------------<BR><BR>"I have found the Pearl of Great Price"<BR>

David,<BR>New to MB, just found your post. Another believer here. Its a good thing that Christians aren't perfect, but we're forgiven. (both) I am 90 days into recovery after discovery, of a serious emotional affair my W was having, (some kissing, hugs, her tried for sex but was refused, thank God!) She admits to thinking about having sex with him,in God eyes that a done deal.<BR>But...She did not see him until just 2 weeks ago, he has stayed away, I have spoken to the OM several times, he is sorry and willdo what ever I ask. OM is married too. So just a word of encouragement and prayer, God can do anything, he hates divorce, the enemy loves it. That who we are fighting, the spiritual world. I will add you to my P list tonight.<BR>

Well, this will be my last post for a while. I don't want to overstay my goodbye, but I wanted to respond to those who responded to me. I may lurk from time to time to keep up with your stories; you are important to me. With the way things are in my marriage, I have to give it everything I have right now or it will die - and I don't want that. <P>Here are my responses to you, my wonderful friends:<P><B>Jim</B><BR>You my friend, are the SAA gate keeper. Your posts to everyone are thoughtful and encouraging. The way you reference material is incredible. You're a good man Jim. I hope and pray your wife returns to you soon and you can start on the path of rebuilding. No matter what happens, I know you will make it. <P><B>Sheba</B><BR>My warrior princess and good buddy. Who owes whom the 2 cents - I keep forgetting. Of course you can email me. Sheba, you impressed me from the very start. You have offered an endless supply of encouragement and sound advice to the multitudes here. I remember reading through posts, and I was amazed at your depth of caring. If there was a thread with only one post, it seems like you were the one that was there. I pray that God will give me your level of caring and compassion. Still haven't got the punching bag, but I'm looking forward to one. Here's a punch in the arm for ya and a hug too.<P><B>Fool No More</B><BR>I don't know much about your story, but I hope you can break that EA your wife is in. Post here and let others help you. There is so much to be gained by posting and getting advice from others in a similar situation. Thank you for the compliments. I hope the best for you.<P><B>Dr. K</B><BR>I still think your Steve . I'm sure you're relieved that I have set an appointment with him. Why has it taken me so long? I'm stubborn I guess. I try to fix things on my own. I can't fix this on my own though. So, thank you for continuing to beat on me about getting to Steve. Thanks K for the tremendous help you have given me right from the beginning. <P><B>mkn</B><BR>Mike, I have been following your story too. It hurts me to see the things your wife does. You're a good man. You have tried and tried to heal your marriage. I hope you find peace soon. I really do. God be with you Mike.<P><B>SamH</B><BR>I know the struggles you are encountering. You are posting often and that's good. Keep seeking advice. Keep trying new things and never give up. Be the new man your wife desires and more importantly the one YOU desire. This trial will test you Sam. It will take an enormous amount of strength, but I know you have it in you. Sometimes, I think us guys need to be tested beyond what we think we can handle. It helps us to se who we really are. You're going to make Sam. <P><B>Just Learning</B><BR>You have a gift. I have noticed that your insight is unique. You see things that others don't. Don't ever lose that. You challenge, you encourage, and you are a wonderful friend. I think you should change your handle to Just Giving. I welcome your emails and I promise to always respond. Thank you JL.<BR><B>KLS</B><BR>I am honored to have helped you. If this trial allows me to help another person through it, then perhaps there is good in this. I hope the best for you. <P><B>Chris</B><BR>You are by far my inspiration for patience. I will email you and I hope your wife returns soon; for you and your daughters. Take care and be well.<P><B>izzy</B><BR>I haven't seen you post for a while. We betrayed men DO have a bond; it's hard to explain but walking through this fire changes us that is for sure. Thank you izzy for being a good friend. <P><B>Paul Moyers</B><BR>My dear brother Paul., I'm not sure you will even read this since you may have already departed, but I will respond regardless. Me Job? I think I'm more of the inverse of Job - Job lost everything except his wife. For some reason, God did not take her. Paul, I have to step back for more than seven days. But, I will keep in touch with you. I need to find out what Christ has in store for me. This trial has tested me way beyond what I thought I would ever endure. I feel Christ has finally broken me, and I give myself and my marriage to him completely. I can't do it on my own any more Paul, He has to carry me now. I'm with you Paul; every step of the way.<P><B>schizzo</B><BR>I am so happy for you that your marriage is recovering. No, you certainly didn't annoy me with our thread the other day; it helped me understand a few things. For that I'm grateful. Best wishes to you schizzo.<P><B>NoTrust</B><BR>Thank you NoTrust for your prayers, I covet prayers more than anything. Be well.<P><B>Wexwill</B><BR>Hey good buddy, some how we inspire one another and in the process created a good friendship. Apologies for the soggy sandwich. I wil be back, I have to know how things go with you. I hope and pray you find this OM (try to refrain from beating the poop out of this guy). I see you as Nick Nolte now and I know Nick can give someone I good pounding. But, under that rough exterior I see a very loving man trying to save his marriage and that is my prayer for you. Keep fighting the good fight Wex, I would go into battle with you any day my friend.<P><B>trustntruth</B><BR>Thank you TNT. I hope you are well and I will be praying for you too.<P><B>*SecretuvmyStrength*</B><BR>Thank you for your wonderful and thoughtful post. You are at the point I am in regards to giving everything over to God. I'll be praying for you. Especially for your H to find Christ. Every woman deserves a man of man of God. God Bless You.<P><B>new_beginning</B><BR>I will miss you too. I know you and your H (a fellow David) are struggling right now. I am praying for you Sheryl and that your marriage will not "just be" as yuou put it, but will heal and "be fruitful" to you both.<P><B>nonplused</B><BR>Thanks for the advice concerning my kids. In reference to the other stuff you suggested, I must pass. I have to do all I can to keep my marriage together. I know your heart's in the right place.<P><B>Roll Me Away</B><BR>You are such a wonderful lady - you gave me that nudge to call Steve and for that I am grateful (yes, I was a scardy cat). As for my title, I recognized early on that infidelity was a dragon and a ferocious one at that. I knew this would be a battle. I'm trying to free my Lady from the dragon's grip, and it is a battle like none I have ever faced. It's time for me to drop my sword, and get on my knees in prayer. It's my last hope. Desiree, your words are so comforting. My hope is your hope, my dreams are your dreams. I pray our marriages will heal. Thank you Desiree.<P><B>SDS</B><BR>Thank you Di. I am prepared for whatever answered and whatever direction God gives me. That's all I can ask of Him, is that I know what the answer is. Be well and I hope you find peace too.<P><B>WilliamJ</B><BR>Bill, I have the book you referenced and it is a good one. I also suggest some books from Mark Bubeck on spiritual warfare. That's where I am now. I am praying for intervention in my wife's life. I know the Holy Spirit is in her, He is just not being given free reign in her life. Thank you for your help and your prayers. <P><B>RWD</B><BR>Bob, I remember your first post under a different user name. I have followed your story from the on set. You have certainly fought the good fight. You have given me strength when I was weak. Your struggles have been great and I know you are a better man having walked through the fire. I will be thinking of you and hope you are well. <P><B>jendan69</B><BR>Jenny, you are a good friend. You are an ocean away from all most of us, yet we are all bonded together from the same trials. Yes, you can email me. Jenny, you deserve that cowboy you're hoping for. Hopefully, your husband will see your true worth, and cherish you as a real man should. Thanks for being a good friend.<P><B>ThisAlex</B><BR>Thanks for posting to me. You certainly have found a good place to help you through your trials. There are so many good people here. You will receive so much help and encouragement, and I know you will offer others the same. We have to help each other through this. Post often and I know you will make it. <P><B>POGP</B><BR>Liz, Thank you. I am happy your marriage is starting to heal. You have what I so much desire. I simply want a wife who will try. You're right, the betrayed guys should start a study in similar lines that you gals have. Maybe someone will, or I may when I return. Liz, you are pearl, your husband is a lucky man.<P><B>jnvc</B><BR>Hello my brother in Christ. I hope your wife is strong enough to keep the OM away. My wife wasn't and there relationship is on again. Be there for her. Comfort her. Help her through witdrawal. EAs are just as difficult to overcome as physical ones. The emotional bond is what is the hardest to break. I pray your recovery is swift and you and your wife develop a new and stronger bond.<P><B>TO ALL</B><BR>I bid you farewell for now. I will return at a later date, I just don't know when. God, will lead me back here at the right time. My MB candle is always burning for you all. I will be in prayer for you as well. You are my friends, even though we have never met. We share a bond that can not be broken. Be well, fight the good fight, and may God Bless you and yours.<P>David - Sir Hurts Alot<P>------------------<BR>There is only one happiness in life, to love and be loved. <P><BR>