Sue has 3 children and is going to college at the same time. How do you pay for college? Are you working at the same time?

Sometimes between children, college and work the spouses don't have time for each other. Maybe he feels threatened by your ambitions, and is just keeping himself occupied while you are busy with everything in your life. Perhaps when you finish college, go to work and have more time and money generally to spend on him, the marriage will recover again on its own.

College is being paid for with student loans. I hope to get hired at a hospital that has a loan repayment program. They will pay 1/2 my loans.

I honestly believe this started before I went to school. I don't believe my being is school is the problem. Even before I went to school he was gone from home alot. He missed his Daughter's ultrasound because he didnt' come home in time. I scheduled it for a Saturday to make it convient for him. Before I started the nursing program I worked full time first shift. Most evenings he was gone until around 9pm. He would eat dinner and leave. Our first anniversay was about 2 weeks after our D was born. I was on maternity leave at that time (yes we have 2 boys from before we got married). Because I was on maternity pay, which was reduced income from my normal pay, $$ was a little tight. No big deal. I figured we could have a nice evening at home. He went and played Hockey. His excuse was we could not afford to go out, and the hockey is already paid for. Then he grabbed a gift from under the christmas tree and gave it to me as if it was my anniversary present. (I felt that was an insult) I would have prefered no gift and an I'm sorry I forgot) (we got married about a week before christmas).

I still work full time. My work let me switch my hours to second shift. I check here on my breaks.

My H has suggested I cut back my hours, but we cannot afford for me to do so.

Sue -- I feel that a person should support their spouse when they are trying to better themselves! When you become a nurse, you will probably be increasing your income quite a bit (obviously I have no idea what you make now...) and your H will also benefit from that.

If he is insecure about you being in school, it is because he is a [censored], and he knows that you will not be dependent on him to survive! Maybe the thought of your success scares him, because then you can leave him (and the crap he puts you through).

All I can say is YOU GO GIRL!!! I hope you have all the success you deserve!!! (and then some!!!)

Maybe this will help the "fog" lift.....

Go study!!!!

-mcnyh

I think he is getting better.

Income wise, initially it will increase my income by about $500/per month depending upon what shift I work, if I pull extra shifts. The raises are alot better than I make now. I average .60 per hour raise. The contract for raises I think is around 1.00. So that alone, will make up for it.

I just got back to work. so I have to be quick here. I left to go my kids school open house. This is the time we can meet the teachers before school starts on Tuesday. We find out what they expect and all that stuff.

The school has a 12 week program where the family meets 1x per week with their kids and other families to build better and stronger families. I asked my H if he wanted us to sign up. He said Yes. I was surprised. The kids meet with other kids and have a kids support group. We will meet with other parents and have a parent support group. I was surprised that he agreed to this.

One thing I will miss when I finish school it the flexibility I have right now with my hours. When events such as open houses come up, I can leave work, and make up the time by staying later, or coming in early during the week. I just have to get in my 40 hours for the week. We have to try to keep within our scheduled work hours, but we have flexibility in our schedules for things such as this.

Sue - another calm day. My H's aunt is in town for a couple of weeks, so she came over for the day. She has not seen my oldest since she was about 7 or 8 months old... and she has never seen my youngest (excpet pictures) so it was nice to have her here! It also gave me something else to think about!

How are things going for you?

-mcnyh

Hi MC,

Days are hectic. We are reroofing the roof. Found out last owner only roofed front 1/2 of roof. By the time we found out, legally we could not do anything.

The more we do around here, the more we find that they covered things up.

Now that we have been here awhile, others on the block are talking to us, and they told us the last owners didn't do anything to take care or maintain the house. Also, they didn't really talk much to us until they saw us doing repairs. From the day one, we knew of some repairs, but we didn't have the funds. Now we are finding it will take more funds than we expected.

Kids start school tomorrow. So I will spend the time studying and catching up on housework.

Sue -- When we bought our house (the one we live in now), it was beautiful... as we started to change things... we found out that the previous owners did a half [censored] job on everything!!! Every "little" update we did turned into a HUGE job!

Our new house needs work since it is a foreclosure. Needs a new roof, new electric service, some new windows, etc. But the way we look at it, for the price we paid for it, even after we put the money into it for repairs, we are getting a great deal!

How was your weekend? I spent mine sick!!! Actually we were all sick!!! Luckily I feel better today!

Hope school keeps you busy!

-mcnyh

Hi
School keeps me way too busy. It is what i need right now. I'm sorry you were sick. I hope you are feeling better.

Roof is almost done. Next project, insulation - hopefully before winter. Project after that, bathroom.

Gotta go to work. I will check back on break

Sue -- I only have a minute... My H's aunt is staying with us now for the next week, but I wanted to let you know that I am doing good, and I am thinking of you! I hope school is starting out good for you!!!

-mcnyh

School is going well so far. Enjoy visit with H's aunt

Almost packed? When do you close? Is your family going to help?

This is one thread that should be in the recovery forum. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Hi MC
How goes it

Sue -- I have been going crazy trying to get ready for our move. We have to be out of here on the 25th. I only have 15 boxes packed so far!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />

I can't wait to move into our new house... maybe then I won't feel so totally stressed out!!! I am having mixed emotions... I love my house, but being here still hurts!!! I sometimes wonder if the images and bad memories will ever go away.

I hope school is going well.

-mcnyh

Hi,
Glad to hear from you. Don't ask about school. Failed first test <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" /> Just took a medical calculations test. I thought I had my answers wrong. I talked to a classmate, and it sounds like we had the same answers, so maybe I did okay. I will find out soon.

Sounds like you need to get packing. good luck on the move.

Hi MC,

Looking forward to hearing all about the new house and all.

Take care

Hi MC,

I hope closing went well? You should be in your new house, and still sorting through boxes. Correct

We seem to have lost MC. Wonder what's happened to Free2bme.

Maybe. MC might be busy with unpacking - I hope.

MC

All okay?