Sorry for disappearing, I guess I don't have too much to write now.

Basically, most of the week was great. As far as I could tell, there wasn't any meeting between her and OM. From my earlier post, I had almost given up, but she seemed to have such a change of heart.

She made plans for all weekend, but things seemed to change a little, and on Monday she made different plans. I'm confused because it seems like when things don't go perfect, I feel like she gives up right away.

Anyways, the other night, I walk in to the office and she's on the computer. Before she could minimize the window I saw the words "we can still see each other because (h4b) has class on ___ nights."

I immediately confronted and told her to prove innocence, she said they were journals. Anyways, I'm getting to the point where I don't care anymore. Today, after work, I told her that I am thinking that I am needing to take action to protect myself. She then says don't do that and she wants to work on things and that as soon as she tries to work on things, I get possessive, etc.

Discussion ends with her saying she wants to work on stuff. Later, I go upstairs and she has drawn up a contract that separates the finances as of today while we work on our marriage.

These are the things that bother me. Why does one minute go good, and another a complete u-turn? I feel so used up, and I can hardly take this anymore.

H4Best~ So glad to see you've come back. I saw your post and response on TryToBeABetterMan's thread. Sounds like A LOT has been going on with you and your W. You also seem like your eyes are more open than before. I am glad. You deserve that. You deserve a happy marriage with an honest, loving W. Not one who only strings you along when you are wising up to her Affair ways.

So, where do things stand now for you?

Bless you~

Yup, I'm back.

Basically, I've been very busy lately and haven't had too much time to write. I've been moving forward with my life, and I think that it is helping the relationship with W. Things seem better, but I want that chemistry that we used to have back.

I feel like she is looking for a spark, but I can't really provide it right now. Something in me wants to work all of this out, but I don't really want to pursue her like I did when we first dated. She's very beautiful and has a great sense of humor and a sharp mind. She is definitely someone who can keep my interest. The thing is, I have a feeling of not really trying too hard because she hasn't cut contact with OM yet. I am not going to get in some sort of competition with him for her, that is not acceptible to me. She needs to cut him out of her life before she can really work on us.

That said, things are getting better. She is more open about where she goes and pays more attention to my feelings. If things continue on this track, they will be great eventually.

I'm still pushing for no contact with OM. Even if it is LBing, it's how it has to be (and soon). I find it insulting that there is continued contact with someone who has tried so hard to rip our marriage apart.

So that's my story...working on things...seeing signs of improvement, but still a ways to go. I know I have work to do, but I am improving my own attitude and confidence level. I think that part of the initial problems were caused when I went to work full-time and didn't take care of her emotionally. I'm trying now...

I remember a post I read about a week ago, (don't remember who posted, but it is the best thing I have read on this site). Basically, the poster gave his story and explained how laying the situation before God and not trying to formulate plans have made things better than ever. I'm trying to do that as well.