Hi DeWayne<P>Sorry I couldn't get to you earlier than now. Yesterday was a very busy day for me and I'm travelling today.<P>I too wanted to offer my concern and support if it can be of any help at all. It certainly is a tough situation you're facing. I do remember some days in my own life where I just felt all my enthusiasm and hope had been knocked out of me. Almost felt like it was difficult to breathe.<P>If I can give you any advice that's worth anything, it's this... just take it a day at a time. Try to keep focused on what you really hope for: getting your W back and working on this relationship. <P>I have got to say, the Harleys have got this Infidelity scenario pegged soooooo well. Right now, the best you can do is follow their model... as few Lovebusters as possible... try to offer her as many positive experiences with you as possible... try to be understanding, yet firm... try to show her as much love as possible. And...keep talking! Hang on! <P>DeWayne, it's soooo obvious from what you've shared us that she DOES still have some very strong feelings for you. You've still got a LOT to work with! Especially (sadly) when contrasted to some of our other friends here.<P>She's also obviously confused. Don't drive her out! Yep, this is sooo difficult. Maybe the toughest challenge you'll ever have. But, look what you're fighting for. Keep the focus.<P>I know part of what you may be thinking. True, you also can't be a doormat and allow yourself to be walked on. But, I also figure you understand the line between the two. I think it's usually pretty clear.<P>As for Xmas? If you can stand it, give it a try. You may have to psych yourself up for it, but it's obviously important to her. Do you understand why? Can you talk with her about it? About how you'll feel? Just asking.<P>Lastly, as for going forward... again, I gently suggest taking it a day at a time. If she makes a decision to leave for awhile, why do you have to counter? Why do you have to make any decision at all right now? I can imagine it's pretty hard to think clearly. So, take your time. Honestly, will a day without action, a day with indecisiveness make any difference? I'd suggest in a time/situation like this, it's best not to make alternative plans quickly.<P>Food for thought.
