I don't normally read all the pages of certain posts but I did read all 4 pages of this one.

IMHO I think that the first thing you need to do is quit talking to the OW. You can't really believe anything she says...and she isn't going to take any of your advise, so talking to her is not only wasting your time....but defeating your purpose.

I see nothing wrong in telling your H that it has to stop....standing up for yourself is not an LB...whether it makes your H mad or not.

Your H has smooth talked his way into getting what he wants. Him and the OW aren't "just friends". He shouldn't being talking to women on the computer in the first place, let alone talking to those same women on the phone.

Your H IS addicted to the computer and he IS addicted to this OW or any other one that he happens to talk to when she isn't available.

Asking you go to bed early so he can have some alone time.......HELLO.......why do YOU have to accomodate his alone time? If he wants ALONE time then maybe HE should go to bed early or he can go outside and sit on the stoop.

I'm sorry to say this....and please don't take it the wrong way....but in a way you have been enabeling him to have this relationship with this woman.

Yes...you control only yourself....but....you get treated the way you ALLOW OTHERS TO TREAT YOU.

He does these things....that hurt you....and when you acknowledge it he tries to make it up to you in a way he knows you want him to....and then when your ok again....it starts back up again on the computer or over the phone.....notice the cycle?

One of you has to break that cycle....or it will continue on and on and on.

Here is a suggestion.

If you do not use the computer for business purposes and for entertainment only....why not unplug it. Just don't use it. As for the OW's phone #'s....call the phone company and see if you can get them blocked....like 900 #'s. Incoming and outgoing.

If your H is serious about loving you and wanting to be with you....then he shouldn't have a problem with it....afterall....the OW isn't a relative....or someone so important that he couldn't live without her.

If none of this helps....then I got a 2x4 handy around here somewhere....maybe that could knock some sense into him.

<small>[ July 15, 2004, 01:22 PM: Message edited by: Miss Priss ]</small>

Hi Star

I am home now I was gone for 2wks.I did get a job but I have not had luck w/an apt so I dont know what I am going to do.I am working on a time frame now.I have 2wks.

I am glad to hear that things are better for you and your H.

Thank you for the words of encouragement.And I am glad that I helped you.
Keep me posted ok.