supermom,

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Friends and relatives at this point are all saying you have done enough, leave him. Since this is pretty much the opinion I am getting and not quite ready to give up, I started posting and it feels great to get an opinion from unbiased audience.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">If you are not ready to give up you might consider going back to plan A under Harley's guidance. I don't think Harley will approve you having contact and talking to him. IMVHO, you are either in plan A or plan B and there is no in between. Now, is OW ready to take over and fillin his ENs that you left void by plan B ?. Pushing to plan B is very dangerous in the sense that if OW is very skillfull you will loose him. If OW is not he will misses those ENs. Talk it over w/ Harley on your next session, ask his/her opinion for going back to plan A. Don't focus on contact w/ OW but focus on controlling your LB and fillin his ENs. Let OW LB'ed all over the place. OW has no stake in your M but you have a lot too loose. She would not be happy knowing that there OW (you) ... she is already LB'ed big time ... Also, she gets angry at him when he comes around to assist me or chooses to spend time with the family or respond to my request for help.. Fight for it and play Venusian ... you know how to break your kitchen's garbage disposal ... let him fix it then treat him like a knight that rescue you. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

-rh-

At this point I would have to agree that I might have to go back to Plan A. OW is very crafty. She is divorced due to an affair and she also had an affair. She has 2 children. Supposedly she is aware of WH bad spirit (multiple affairs in the past). They have had talks of moving in together and plans to have a baby even.

Right now, I guess I just need help in the pain. This is too much...I do know how to break my disposal.... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

supermom ... how about change a front porch light buld with the dead ones <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> ?. In short I do think you could win this as long as you keep your take at bay and focus on plan A.

I am too independent <> Be clingy, let him take care of you once in a while.
and hard to love. <> Blow his ego up when he help you out ... even a small thing.
I am difficult to talk <> you have two ears and a jaw to bite your tounge.

Talk to Harley, I don't think you are done with plan A and OW is LB'ng. Make it safe for him to come back, i.e. don't talk about A or OW at all, focus on plan A.

Don't take WH's words or actions personally ... how do you take care of insane person ?, all actions, even the future actions are forgiven !. WH is currently is in that state, addicted to his own A.

Hang in there .... keep posting and to others too, it would help you out.

-rh-

WH went to counseling on Wednesday, and felt he had some breakthrough. Still not sure of what he wants to do, but I guess OW was anxious to find out what it was all about and she had been calling to get to the bottom of this.

I was bothered because he promised to call me after his appointment, but I did not hear from him until late. When he finally called, all he could say is he can't talk about it for a few days. Anyways, he calls at 1:30 in the morning and wanted to come over to talk. Tells me that he called it quits with OW but that he still is not quite sure, but he wants to see about working things out but will let me know by next week after more IC session. I did not quite know how to react and felt that I did not convince him to come back and I felt rejected again.

At this point, I definitely think, I need to go back to Plan A which I decided on my own this a.m.. No time to wait for Harley session. When I woke up this morning, I am feeling hurt and relieve at the same time. I mailed him recovery plan and I am waiting for response. I sent message to OW to put her on notice and told her to give this family a chance but obviously won't hear any of it and told me to stop bothering her.

I have not heard back from him. What do you think he is thinking? Am I right to go back to Plan A. Again thanks for all the response so far.