NY,

Thanks a lot. I haven't got your e-mial yet. I will check a little bit later.

I feel a little better now. S and I just finished dinner. D went to her friends house. We are watching wheel of fortune.

That's it just do everything like normal. That is what I try to do. Take it easy and have fun with your kids. We did lots of stuff this week together to take up time and make my mind go somewhere else. Are you on Anti-Ds? I am and it really helped a lot. Xannax to sleep at night, that isn't helping but I am going to try to get something different next week. Have a good night. Talk to you later.

Ny,

I still did not get your e-mail. It is kzmath@hotmail.com. I am on Xenax too. I too one last night, but I still feel tired now. My Dr. told me to take it only as needed. So I dib not take too much.

Hey, what's all this about? Everyone here needs to keep their chin up. Otherwise you may never make it through this.

It took my H 3 months of running wild with the OW before he started coming a little to his senses. And he is still not there yet.

Put H on the back burner, and have a nice life for you and kids. You have to start doing something to increase your self-esteem.

Believer,

I hear you.

Bur my mood is a down side now. I need to vent.

Any suggestion what I should do with the kids to have fun. I suggested games, S was screaming to say NO. D was in tear and saying that daddy only cares himself. Why does he have to go out and leave us a lone. This week, the kids saw enough movies. They are tired of TV. I offered to take them to the mall, they refuse to. D told me that she didn't feel like it if dad is going somewhere else. Finally, she went to her friends house. S and I are alone here.

I did clean another draw. S open a toy that needs a lot of instruction to build. we build it together(this should be a great oppotunity for father and son). And it did not work. So he said he will ask dad when he comes home.

Believer, you are right. I should have put him behind. I was telling myself that H is dead, the person I see is just some alien in his body.

Today, he stayed home in the afternoon. When I came home, all the gabages were out, dishes are clean(he never did that). He did laundry too. I have to give him credit for ding those. But I don't understand why he did all those. He never did these house work before. Was he feeling guilty? Should I hire a PI to find out where he is and with whom?

Believer,

I thought you were in recovery? How long have you been doing this for?

Lost,

I emailed you, you should get it soon. I have aol.

Believer,

I thought you were in recovery? How long have you been doing this for?

Lost,

I emailed you, you should get it soon. I have aol.

NY,

Believer is the strongest I've seen so far. She is aslo very helpful and supportive to everyone here. She is a GOD sent.

Lost,

You are right she is. I look for her online all the time. I am having some trouble posting at times. I keep getting a flood error and I have to wait and then my posts come up twice for some reason. Just to let you know why they are twice.

Ny,

Because there are too many heatbroken people here. I am thinking to go to s church's support group near by. Not the one I go usually. I don't want the people around me to know the problem yet. If it can be resolved quietly, it will be great.

Lost,

That is a great idea. Get as much support help as you can. Whatever it takes to get through this. We will be here for you.

NY,

I feel a lot better now. Life has to go on right?

My father just called and asked for H. He needs him to fix his computer. I had to tell him that he is busy. I only told my sister and a friend about the problem. My parents love me, but I don't think they know how to be supportive. Last year, I had to remove a ovarien cyst. They only cried. I had to comfort them. So I decide to not to tell them anything yet.

Lost,

Life does go on and I think that is the point everyone is always trying to push. I just go about life like normal. Until he has to come and get S. Then everything falls a part. Everything is so up in the air. We might have to move from our house into a trailer and everything. He is only going to pay the bills for so long. I am sure OW will get P about that after a while. I love my house. I am a SAHM and waiting a SSD case to go through for two back surgeries. Hopefully I will hear something soon so I know where we stand financially in the future. I figure as long as we are still in this house we still have a chance at a future together as a family again.

NY,

I will pray for you. Please have a good sleep tonight so you can show your best to H when he comes. We are all here with you.

Hi everyone. I am in recovery, but unfortunately alone. H is still going back between me and OW.

However all my days are good. You will get there too. That is what is so great about the MB plans. Just stick to them. Do not waiver.

Thank God our kids are grown. They are still hurting over this, but not like little ones hurt. My s-daughter has gained 60 pounds, my other s-daughter is almost to 250. She is a beautiful girl, but this whole thing has hurt her.

This whole thing is very hard on the family too. You ladies here with children need to come along side them and love and support them. Let them know that mom has a plan. Comfort them and tell them that you are taking care of things.

Get into the habit of having fun with just them. Put WH on the back burner and start living your life. Plan things with kids, without WH. For most of you, H has always been a part of activities. Now that has temporarily changed.

Kids are easy. They follow your lead. If you get enthusiastic about something, they will too. Play monopoly, organize their rooms, do crafts, go fishing, go walking, sight-seeing, get some fish, get a cat or dog, get a snake, anything to distract them.

Believer,

I think that I behaved like a kid this afternoon. Parents or teachers told you what is the right thing to do and you just go your onw way. I feel that I have to fight with my feeling everyday. I need to pray a lot.

In law just called to find H. I told him that he is not home. He was so suprised. I told him that he seldom home now and said no more. he said he will call his cell.

Part of Plan A is exposing the affair. When you get more information, you need to tell everyone.

Also try to go out and do something fun today. Don't sit around and watch H sleep.

Good morning, Believer.

You are so early. I see that you reply to every one. Thanks a lot.

H didn't come home till almost 2am. Of course he is sleeping now. I just a receipt of almost $200 for fine jewlry paid in cash from his wallet, dated 11/26/03. That was about the time this A started. I made acopy. I will have to store these thing in a safe place.

S already got up. But D is still sleeping. I promise to take them to the mall, no matter H is going or not. You are right, I need to shift my focus.

Good for you. When you go, forget about H, engage the kids. Go somewhere fun for lunch and have a good time.

Hide that receipt copy where he won't find it.

Yesterday it ended up a long day. When we were ready to go, H said he wanted to join us. Then I asked him whether he can fix my father's computer, he said ok. So we went to parent's apartment first and had the computer fixed.

Then we headed to a very large mall to have lunch. Spend almost 6 hr. to walk around indifferent stores. It was a long walk and good excersice. At first, my mood was very low, I knew that I can not show it. I kept telling myself that I need to enjoy it and i also prayed. Finally I was able to bring it up. H kept asking the kids: Are you happy? at least 10 times.

Then we went to Chinese restraunt for dinner. We got the reading from the fortune cookies.

His: When you speak honestly and openly, others truly listen to you.

Mine: Your path is arduoud, but will be amply rewarding.


Oh, mine, what a reading. I hope it is true. I am not supersticious, but these words do give me some encouragement. Then we went grocery shopping, didn't come home till 11pm. It was a tired day, but it is good. I just wished I could have enjoyed more.

Now I need to get the kids up and get ready to go to church. I am sure that H will go somewhere, but I don't care.

The idea of getting a PI is keeping lingering in my mind. Should I hire one? I need to have some evidence who he is with.