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Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 13
Junior Member
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OP
Junior Member
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 13 |
Hi All,
My WS is seriously considering moving out of house (plan B?) without an attempt of plan A. I'm pro plan A but W won't consider. My utmost efforts of filling her Love Bank is ignored as it seems that she's diliberately ignoring my efforts. THis hurts a lot! She complains that I'm smuthering her. I feel that if I'd back-up that she'll have more time with OM after hours - and therfor their Love Banks will grow - pushing me further away from her (and daughter). What am I to do?
Thanks A
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069
Member
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Member
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069 |
Unfortunately, the only one you can change or control is yourself. So if she decides to leave, just let her go. When she is living by herself she will get a big dose of reality.
Is the OM married? If so you can tell his wife of your suspicions.
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Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 13
Junior Member
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OP
Junior Member
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 13 |
HI,
No OM not married. He was engaged but that relationship didn't work. I don't suspect the break-up happened because of my W. I think that they were both emotionally very down and after discussing each others problems (at work) started with an emotional affair that progressed over the month or so that followed.
Another factor is that this A is a secret between myself, my WS, OM and 2 friends (couple). My WS mother is vaguely aware that things are right between us and might be aware of OM - but not in detail. I have thought about blowing the bubble but fear that this will make matters worse between myself and WS.
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069
Member
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Member
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069 |
The marriagebuilders plan is to tell everyone. Affairs thrive on secrecy, to maintain the fantasy. And yes, your wife will be mad, they all are.
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