That's what I like to hear - Show them the way!!!!!!<P>Deb -I'm glad you went for breakfast and a few more of those and some other things like that and that distance will disappear..... Good for you!!!<BR>See - the "no undies" brought you luck just like CL said.......<P>WS - I'm glad things are well with you and H and isn't it amazing how with some of them you have to pet them like puppies!!! Hey - I don't mind as long as they catch on!!!!! <P>Hugs,<P>Sheba

So who's doing what this weekend?, I don't think we will be doing much here, no plans as far as I know. Execpt I am hoping to be able to pick up some sand and some dollar store store dolls (which I will promptly remove the heads and arms from ) and some hot glue sticks, I LOVE HOT GLUE, it is the greatest thing since sliced bread.<BR>What I have decided about my marriage is this, If he cheats again, I can't help it, period the end. There is not one darn thing i can do about it one way or another. BUT I am going to get the shrink to change my medication next week, the zoloft doesn't seem to be working anymore, and a higher dose of it will only make my life worse with the side effects, been there done that, it was increased upon discovery, wonder what else they can give me? I am beginning to wonder if i am just crazy, maybe the same cow kicked my whole family, both sides are a bit off so maybe thats it.<P>------------------<BR>Just call me - Deb<BR>------------------------<BR>The only day I can do anything about is today, yesterday is gone, tomorrow is not yet mine.<P>

Deb -<P>Wow! Talk about the roller coaster of emotions, huh?! I've been doing a little of that as well. I have also been thinking of asking my Dr. about the anti-D's because stress at work (persecution ...) is killing me, and I have been very down for the last 3-4 weeks with no "up" in sight. Not a good thing following such an "up" summer, and I can't quite figure it all out... well, money problems are part of it, and so is not being able to do much of anything because of money problems ...<P>Deb, he is with you. I don't know how much that says, but it has to say something... Have you read Divorce Busting by Michele Weiner-Davis? It's a great book. How about The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman? That one is wonderful. I've found that re-reading these books and others I have has been very helpful to maintaining my patience and belief. I have to go back and read some of them again myself.<P>{{{{{{{{{{Deb}}}}}}}}}}<P>Hope you are feeling better soon!<P>------------------<BR>terri<BR>No, I'm not a Marriage Counselor,<BR>But I did sleep at a <BR>Holiday Inn Express last night...<BR>

Terri,<BR> I'm not sure what him being here say's, I mean he was home when he cheated last time too, and that was after we had gotten back together after him living with the wildebeast for 1 1/2 years. So I just don't know anything anymore. I'm sorry you are having a rough time too. I have been listening to Joyce Meyers lately, teaching about emotions and feelings. It seems to be helping little bits keep getting through the fog I seem to be in. I have arranged for some of the kids around here to start coming back up to the porch of my apt. Tuesdays to work on some crafts, They all want to work on the dolls like I am, but I can't afford to pay for the materials for all of them, so we will do vegtable cans or soup cans covered in cloth to make pencil cups or something. If their parents would help just a little with the cost of materials it would help but they can't or won'tso I will do the best I can with what I've got, I think that learning they can take something that normally would be thrown away and making something pretty out of it helps their sense of self worth. I know it helps mine.<P>------------------<BR>Just call me - Deb<BR>------------------------<BR>The only day I can do anything about is today, yesterday is gone, tomorrow is not yet mine.<P><p>[This message has been edited by Bozos_ Deb (edited September 04, 1999).]

Deb -<P>Joyce Meyers is absolutely the perfect teacher for you to be listening to right now! WOW!<P>I get her magazines - Life in the Word. She has a website where you can sign up for her magazines for free.<P>I love to watch her, she really speaks to us women. And I love her accent - is it anything like yours? I bet it is....<P>Here is an excerpt from August 1999 issue of Life in the Word: <P>"....There is a battle going on, and you are in that battle. And the battle takes place in your mind. The weapons the enemy uses against you are wrong thoughts and lies. He is a liar and the father of lies (see John 8:44). He lies to you and gives you wrong thoughts because he is trying to steal God's will for your life. He's trying to get you to believe what he says, more than - you believe what God's Word says. And if he can get you to do that, then h ewill steal God's good plan for your life.<P>But you don't have to let the devil win. the Bible promises that ...no weapon that is formed against you shall prosper, and every tongue that shall rise against you in judgement you shall show to be in the wrong... (Isaiah 54:17. the enemy can use a person speaking against you as a weapon to hurt you. But as a believer, you have a better weapon-not carnal, but spiritual. It is the powerful Word of God.<P>***Now can't you hear her saying this:<P>If someone were on the battlefield with guns and grenades and all kinds of weapons that they weren't willing to use, whose fault would it be if they were defeated? Think about it. It's the same with your warfare. when the enemy attacks you, don't sit there and say, "Well I just wish the enemy wouldn't come against me. I don't feel like using these weapons-it's too much trouble." If you do that, you'll be defeated right there on your own territory.<P>The Bible teaches us to 1) Believe the Word, 2) Pray the Word, and 3) Speak the Word.<P>****<P>Speak the Word.... Positive Confession Bible Study????? <P>God Bless You, Deb!<P>Connie

Hey Deb -<P>How are you today? Where are you today?<P>I'm glad that TNT (Hi there, TNT!!) brought this up because I meant to write something on it.<P>My short term memory is shot as explained on WS's Memory thread!!!<P>I wanted to say good for you with the "if he cheats - there's nothing I can do PERIOD" train of thought. That will help if you truly believe it.<P>I also, wanted to again say what a wonderful person you are to care and help teach the neighborhood kids. That is truly an act of a selfless and caring daughter of God.<P>WE LOVE YOU, you know!!!!!<P>Hugs, <P>Sheba

hello deb, I missed this last week, but am glad to see the progress that appears thru your posts!! In one short week too. <BR>Trust and faith in our spouses...something we all know too well? But why is it that these books suggest that the spouse has to earn the trust back? That may work for some, but not all! <BR>Can you tell mike exactly what you want to see from him to show that you can trust him? It is pretty hard to put those feelings into words, but worth a try. Maybe he is confused and cannot see clearly. Does he need a plan to follow? I know it sounds silly, but some people need that kind of structure.<BR>If the 'earning' of the trust is just too much, you may try what I did. That was to just give him the trust and all that accompanies it. BIG leap of faith, but it worked out best for us.<BR>(((hugs)))

hoorah,<BR> cl is back !!!!!<BR> I am trying guy's I really am, Mike was home from midnight friday till about an hour ago, he has been on the computer or working on it all weekend, thats why I haven't been able to post much.<BR>Sheba,<BR> None of the kids showed up today, I may change the days to Sat. Most don't want to come now, because I can'nt teach them how to make the door stop dolls. It would just cost me too much money. Instead I am trying to get them to do recycle projects, like vegtable cans into pencil holders or 2 ltr coke bottles into planters.<BR>TnT,<BR> Joyce Meyer is good, Auntie Pooh is the one who first told me about her ,if you really want to hear my favorite evangelist, check out Jesse Duplantis, Mike will even sometimes listen to him, Auntie Pooh didn't like him at first, but she does now, she said she thought that he had too much fun preaching, then she got a good dose of it. Jesse has had me ROFLMBFBO more than once. I love his sense of humor.<BR> I am not depressed right now, still going to ask the DR. to change my meds though, I heard welbutrin helps with stopping smoking too and I need to try to stop that.<P>------------------<BR>Just call me - Deb<BR>------------------------<BR>The only day I can do anything about is today, yesterday is gone, tomorrow is not yet mine.<P>

I tried the wellbutrin for stopping smoking, it did nothing for me - and I didn't notice any change regarding the anti-depressants. I left a month supply in the cabinet for future attempt with the pads. Noticed they are gone now. <P>I have a 16 year old SD with a drug problem - she probably thought they would make her feel better. She stopped doing drugs when she came to live with us May of last year, but she went back to CA to visit mom and other SD in the summer, and got back August 10th. - and we're sure she's back to the problem. Now the other 19 year old SD is coming to live with us on the 26th or 27th - so we are having to deal with some real issues here. I'm hoping I'm a help and not a hindrance - we are very concerned about this. The SD's do not like me, because I am too strict, and I "took their father away from them...." Husband is more loose than me, and their mother is looser yet.<P>I love Jesse Duplantis! He cracks me up. I love his stories about meeting people on the airplane, or in an airport. He is just something else. Bold? Ha<P>I like Marilyn Hickey too. She's really good, and easy to follow.<P>Auntie Pooh and I are on the same wavelength? <P>