(((((((((((((((Mapleleaf)))))))))))))))<P>So sad to see what time it is there and you haven't slept. I just wanted you to know someone read this post and that I care.<P>I have read your story, and I am very sorry that this is happening to you. I wish I could give you more encouarging words than "hang in there".<P>I think you really need to step completely out of the picture now. I don't mean forget him, I mean total, pure Plan B. There is some info on this board about it, under peoplepleaser's "Cliff" stuff.<P>Hard as it is for you to come to terms with, nothing is going to make your H dump the OW at this point because of that fog. Plan B in it's pure sense will at least put an end to hurtful situations for you. <P>Take care, and do try to sleep, with the knowledge that there are many here to help.<P>Nina

The strangest thing just happened. I had just gone to bed (at 6:00 AM) and decided to call my sister to cry on her shoulder for a bit. As I was talking to her and she was telling me the same thing as you were Nina too, I heard foosteps. I hung up and my husband walked into the bedroom.I had not heard him. He came over to the bed and lied down next to me. He did not say anything for a while. Then he told me he could not stand to see me unhappy and that he would give up OW to make me happy. He said it would make him unhappy but that he would do that for me. Except, he said, that I would think he was unhappy and I would not like it, or something to that effect.How complicated is that? <BR>I am so tired that I did not react and actually don't know what to make of it. Is he manipulating me again so that we can start all over again as we were? <BR>I think I am going to see a psychiatrist today and get some antidepressants before I go completely nuts.

Well I made it to work this morning after taking a cold bath and drinking very hot, very strong tea. I am back on here because I need advice. My H just called from work to ask me how I felt. Sweet voice, concern in his voice. I simply replied that I was very, very confused. He said I know and asked if he could come by to talk tonight. I did not say yes, left it open, but I wonder what the deal is now. <P>Nina too, I did not thank you enough for acknowledging my post this morning. Let me do it now. It really helps to know someone cares enough to respond. I get so lonely, especially when I can't sleep at night, which is every single night for the last 22 months. <BR>You said to do a strict plan B; my sister is furious and says he is mentally ill. That he has an elastic around my waist and pulls on it whenever he feels like it and I bounce right back like a bungie cord. She says to face the fact that he cares only about his well being and to start planning the rest of my life without him since even if he wanted to come back, why would I want the jerk now anyway.<P>I can't imagine going through what I went through yesterday. I wanted to die. Not kill myself, just die suddenly, painlessly.<BR>On the other hand part of me tells me that I should hear what he has to say and if it's the same painful crap, tell him to leave. <P>My question is, am I handing him the sticks to beat me with?<BR>Is he pulling on the elastic one more time?<BR>Why can't I see things as plainly as my sister? She had a bitter divorce many years ago and has been happily remarried for 14 years. She says the difference is she hated the guy and could not wait to get rid of him. She had stayed with him because there had never been a divorce in either family and she was ashamed and because she wanted her kids to have a father at home.<P>Does anyone want to help me with this? <BR>