LOL LOL, she probably looked like a horse, too!!!<P>Did you see this joke I posted the other day???<P><BR>> >> >> 70-year old George went for his annual physical. All<BR>> >> >> of his tests came back with normal results. Dr. Smith<BR>> >> >> said, "George, everything looks great physically.<BR>> >> >> How are you doing mentally and emotionally? Are you<BR>> >> >> at peace with yourself, and do you have a good relationship<BR>> >> >> with God?"<BR>> >> >><BR>> >> >> George replied, "God and me are tight. He knows I have<BR>> >> >> poor eyesight, so he's fixed it so that when I get up<BR>> >> >> in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom *poof*<BR>> >> >> the light goes on, when I'm done *poof* the light goes<BR>> >> >> off."<BR>> >> >><BR>> >> >> "Wow!" commented Dr. Smith, "That's incredible!"<BR>> >> >><BR>> >> >> A little later in the day Dr. Smith called George's<BR>> >> >> wife.<BR>> >> >><BR>> >> >> "Ethel," he said, "George is doing fine. Physically<BR>> >> >> he's great. But, I had to call because I'm in awe of<BR>> >> >> his relationship with God. Is it true that he gets up<BR>> >> >> during the night and *poof* the light goes on in the<BR>> >> >> bathroom, and then when he is through *poof* the light<BR>> >> >> goes off?"<BR>> >> >><BR>> >> >> Ethel exclaimed, "Oh, my God! He's peeing in the refrigerator<BR>> >> >> again!"<BR>> >> >><BR>> <P><BR>

This topic gave me such a laugh today that I thought I'd bump it!!!

Mike really I don't have a prob. with the seat. Always lived with males....<BR>Omgs you made me laugh so hard... Speaking of pee lol.....<P>You go Nina<P>janet

LOL, well I have to say, the look on my oldest son's face was priceless, the day I explained to him that when he pees with the seat DOWN, that his poor mother ends up sitting in his splattered pee.<P>Well, he was careful for about 2 days.<P>Sigh. I'd love to be a woman with a problem with the lid being left UP.<P>How do you convince them to lift the darn thing in the first place?<P>Anyway, HI Bumper!! I'm still here, been kinda moping around, feeling like I don't really belong much of anywhere on the boards these days. Recovery doesn't really seem to strike much of a cord with me, D/D is kinda weird...and GQ is painful - oh yeah, the EN board seems to be mostly about SEX! <P>Things are going ok though!<P>------------------<BR><I>Pain is a given, misery is optional.</I>

Mike,<P>I thought of you today. Thanks to BR for starting this great thread. It has shown me that no matter what, our kids will always be underestimated. Especially the boy!<P>Anyway, today I'm out loading up another load of brush/tree limbs etc to take to landfill ( 11 loads so far, oh my aching back.) My son and the dog are with me. A car goes by and I look up to make sure no one is in the road. What do I see but my "oh-so-shy, ha!" son standing on the corner of the intersection, pants down, peeing into the street. He seemed to be very happy and content. He even waved ( his free hand ) at the neighbor as they drove by. <P>I could have died, but it would have been from laughter not embarassment. That boy just kills me!. Can't take my eye off him for a minute. <P>Needless to say, I'm preparing for the comments tomorrow in Church, as most of the neighbors and I attend the same place. <P>

When we lived in Romania... my boys would love it when I'd leave them in the car for a moment to pop into a store quick... they'd roll down the window and pee right out onto the street!<P>I love the ping-pong in the toilet idea... I may have to try that... but what happens when they hit the ping pong...? Doesn't it splatter everywhere? The closest experience I can get to relating to that is at the fair... those water pistol games where you aim and when you hit that little target the car goes up and the first car up gets the prize? Oh but what a mess... but the ping pong ball would keep moving so it's not a fixed/sprayable target I guess... Nina too, you lived in Mozambique? Cool - doing what? Never been to Africa, yet... But the female experience sounds similar to what I've seen in India... only 6 yards of sari material to hoist!<P>I also had a boyfriend from my younger days who would go in a pop bottle to save from having to stop the car! I was appalled... but hey, men are boys and boys will be men, no?<P>BR, I'm not sure men grow up in the sense we women think they grow up... but hey, doesn't the bible talk about being like little children? So, Mike... let the guy pee in your strawberry patch... why didn't you join him? <P>BR - just stay here... we've missed you! <P>Take care!<P>------------------<BR><I>The new country is where you are called to go, and the only way to go there is naked and vulnerable</I> ~ Henri Nouwen

Idunno, Nicole, you know I always manage to miss those true male bonding experiences, I guess that's just my lot!<P>I was smart enough not to pee on the electric fence when my brothers told me to, and I think that has helped!<P>Oddly enough, when I told my roommate that I had to go post in the 'Guys Who Pee and the Women Who Laugh At Them' thread, he told me how using the bottle saves time by not having to stop! <B>How on earth could I argue with that sort of airtight logic?</B> <P>You know, when I was younger, people told me that I might be 'book smart', but I had no common sense...you ladies have proven that to me once and for all...excuse me, I'm going up on my roof to have a quick pee! -Mike<p>[This message has been edited by waiting_for_her (edited August 19, 2001).]

I was telling my friend about this thred, too, and I had her in stitches!!! She's got two boys.<P>Okay here's another pee story all the way from Australia!!!<P>When our football teams go on their end of season weekend away, they have a big plastic dustbin at the front of the bus......guess what it's for!!!

You know about this pee thing it brought back a funny memory that always happenes during my marriage..<BR>My eh used to drink alot and anyway when ever he used to have to go he would pull the car over open the door and pretend he was checking the tire... The kids always got a kick out of this (of course they are both boys).. <P>I geuss the crazest pee thing I ever did was pee in the woods and got scared Sh*tless......<P>I always led a boring life...<P>Janet

I saw BR's link to this old thread and I had to add on.

Now you must understand that I grew up with six sisters and no brothers. My mother was quite proper. I am a new mom to two boys we just adopted from Russia, ages 7 and 10. The ways of boys are a mystery to me. We have a laundry shoot that goes from the upstairs hall down the the laundry room/bathroom combination on the first floor. His younger brother was down there going poop. My kids weren't speaking very good English at this point. Now that you know all pertinent details--my story:

I had my ten year old undressed and ready to get in the shower. I turn on the water and suddenly he is not there next to me. I walk out into the hall to find him with his bum stuck in the laundry shoot! He tried to free his bum from its wedged in position and he was a little stuck. On his second try he freed himself. He popped out and fell on the floor. He was laughing like a little idiot and farting a near continule stream of noxious gasses from some far flung decaying part of the universe. The more he laughed, the more he farted. He reminded me of a balloon that someone had blown up and then let go of. He was nearly launching himself.

I am laughing hysterically at this point even though we have made a point of teaching them that ladies don't enjoy potty humor as much as other boys and Papa do.

I said to him "Are you showing your bum to your brother?"

He is yelling and laughing "Mama no fair. Mama laughing, me laughing me can't stop passing gas. No laughing Mama."

I asked again "Are you showing you bum to your brother?"

He said "No. I be sending my gas downstairs to my brother."

Only a 10-year-old boy could think of farting into a laundry shoot.

MJ

Thanks for bumping it up over here. I posted a story too ......

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> I have a male pee story to add ----

We were caravaning to a soccer tournament & the car in front of me threw a cup of soda out the window & hit my windshield. At the rest stop I asked why he threw his soda out the window. The Dad told me it was pee. I didn't believe him at first, but he really did it. After that I didn't follow behind his car

</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Here's another one that I thought was a riot - </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Originally posted by worthatry:
.....But to contribute, I'll share a fond moment from Jr. High school. A guy classmate defending his discussion of farting asked the teacher, "why the fuss?"

He declared it's a normal bodily function - nothing more than an "anal sneeze" - and should generate a correspondingly sincere "bless you."

I recall the teacher being speechless.

WAT
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

WAT!!!
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">D.

My husband summed up everything they did that I could't understand or figure out as "it's just boy stuff, don't worry about it." I heard it so much that I thought I might bop him if he tells me that one more time.

So I have your answer, "it's just boy stuff."

He was one of 5 boys, so I guess he knew. They lived in an old farm house and their bedrooms were upstairs with the parents below. His father had a hard time figuring out why the tv antenna rusted. He could hear them so they figured out that by peeing on the antenna, he couldn't hear it.

We also still have a wooden bowl something (part of an old smoking stand I think) that one of them peed in one night and it froze and burst - in the house.

<small>[ January 13, 2003, 08:55 PM: Message edited by: becontent ]</small>