Hi everyone! I am feelin' fine!

I just wanted to let you all know that I went out of town on Tuesday, and while I was driving I said a whole entire Rosary for all of you. (I normally just pray short prayers). I hope it helped.

WGTT:

You must apply for an annulment in your diocese. Your priest can tell you where you can pick up the forms. It is a kind of painful process to fill the forms in. You don't need your spouse's participation to get an annulment. The annulment application will be reviewed by a diocesean tribunal, they will make a decision to grant it or not.

An annulment states that AT THE MOMENT OF VOWS the marriage was illegitimate. For example, violence in the marriage, coercion, or one spouse not understanding the vows or having the intention of carrying them out are reasons you can get an annulment. The process takes from 12 to 18 months. If you wish to remarry in the Church, you will need an annulment.

An annulment does not dissolve a marriage (this is impossible in the Church.) it simply states ther was never a marriage. (This does NOT make your children illegitimate).

I hope this help you!! Your priest can give you better information. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

A.

Yes, I will take credit for the co-parenting with Satan remark - of course I was referring to my ExH instead of OW - but since I don't know anything good about her, the phrase may apply to her as well.

Welcome to WhoIamnow. I think people have a misconception of Catholics - like they are all talk and show and no substance, but I don't find that to be the case at all.

I wanted to add my 2 cents about the annulment process. The church is trying to determine whether the marriage is sacramental or not, and if one party decides not to live the sacrament because of their own free will - well then, one person can't really live a two person sacrament, so the church looks for the defect that is causing the person to not be able to live the sacrament of marriage.

It's sad because since marriage is a sacrament, there are all sorts of special graces and blessings that you get from God to help the two spouses live together for life, but Satan does have a way of getting in the way sometimes.

I haven't finished writing out my "marital anaylysis" yet, actually I haven't started - it's just a bunch of questions and then it's reviewed to see if there are any defects and then questions are created for witnesses(which you have to provide) to collaborate these events/defects.

I still believe that most marriages can be saved, and I think the Harley principles are right on - even though my ExH is an Ex and is buying a house and thinking about marrying OW, I don't see the relationship working AT ALL - I mean I jsut found out today that OW has to go work out regularly - she told the kids it's so her butt doesn't get big - well this tells me a few things 1) either she is self conscious about herself - which will be a problem because there is no way she'll have time to work out with all 6 kids there or 2) she puts physical attractiveness up there as an emotional need - and well lets put it this way, ExH has put on weight, he likes fast food, eats as a comfort mechanism and HATES to exercise, so when the infatuation wears off she's going to be in for a big surprise - especially since her ExH regularly works out and keeps himself in top physical condition(he has to for his job).

So more and more the MB principles make sense, but trying to deal with the fallout is hell and you cna't make the WS change into the person you know they can be.

Prayers will be sent everyone's way - and this way it keeps me prayerful - when I know others are out there counting on me. And I'll be the first one to say that prayer really does work - I've seen it in action too many times not to think that it does.

So keep the faith everyone! K

Avatar & God is in Control,

Thanks for the info on annulments. I will be seeking a legal separation (Attorney avised as joint assets are protected) But at some point, will probabaly DV, unless WH has a "Paul" expierience.

GIIC, I agree so many think that there is no substance to the Catholic Religion. But I find most are very devoted. I go to a charismatic prayer group & my spritual life skyrocked. I didn't grow up a Catholic & didn't even become one when WH & I got M. I decided after finding the prayer group.

When I am in need of prayer I really hope that others that I have asked to pray for me really are praying hard ..... and that made me realize how important it is to pray for others. Prayer can make such a huge difference.

Everyone on this board has a lot to be thankful for .... one that this even exists. When my WH had A's in the past, I had no idea about any of the MB principles nor the support to be had from this board. I went to see an attorney 7 years into my M (cuz of WH) and can see if I had gotten DV then, I would have carried all my anger & frustration and stuff with me. This way I can let go with grace knowing that I did everything humanly possible (this is not something I take lightly)

In the morning, I going to Adoration of the Blessed sacrament & will lift y'all up in prayer.

On the GQ board, I think it was Orchid who recommed the revised edition of love busters. I bouhgt the book today, even though I'm moving on. It is excellent. There is a new section on Independant behavior. That I could relate to. My WH would make decisions and not consider anyone else but himself. I also got what you feel you can heal by John Gray. It looked good even though it was about R's, it will help in any R.

I've found that I don't speak up and tell my true feelings. Add in a WH who doesn't think of others and the commbination isn't good. I am determined to change (and have been) to speak my mind, tactfully.

God Bless everyone,

D.