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"A female friend sent this to me with the following statement:
Thought since you were so in tune with your feminine side, you might appreciate seeing things from our point of view!!!
And I just felt is should be shared"""
This explains it all......
We start to "bud" in our blouses at 9 or 10 years old only to find anything that comes in contact with those tender, blooming buds hurts so bad it brings us to tears. Enter the almighty, uncomfortable training bra contraption the boys in school will snap until we have calluses on our backs.
Next, we get our periods in our early to mid-teens (or sooner). Along with those budding boobs, we now bloat, we cramp, we get the hormone crankies, have to wear little mattresses between our legs or insert tubular, packed cotton rods in places we didn't even know we had.
Our next little rite of passage (premarital or not) is having sex for the first time which is about as much fun as having a ramrod push your uterus through your nostrils (If he did it right and didn't end up with his little cart before his horse), leaving us to wonder what all the fuss was about.
Then it's off to Motherhood where we learn to live on dry crackers and water for a few months so we don't spend the entire day leaning over Brother John. Of course, amazing creatures that we are (and we are), we learn to live with the growing little angels inside us steadily kicking our innards night and day making us wonder if we're having Rosemary's Baby. Our once flat bellies now look like we swallowed a watermelon whole and we pee our pants every time we sneeze. When the big moment arrives, the dam in our blessed Nether Regions will invariably burst right in the middle of the mall and we'll waddle with our big cartoon feet moaning in pain all the way to the ER. Then it's huff and puff and beg to die while the OB says, "Please stop screaming, Mrs. Hear - me - roar. Calm down and push. Just one more (or 10 ) good push," warranting a strong, well-deserved impulse to punch the Jerk (and hubby) square in the nose for making us cram a wiggling, mushroom-headed 10 lb. bowling ball through a keyhole.
After that, it's time to raise those angels only to find that when all that "cute" wears off, the beautiful little darlings morph into walking, jabbering, wet, gooey, snot-blowing, life-sucking little poop machines.
The teen years. Need I say more? The kids are almost grown now and we women hit our voracious sexual prime in our mid-30's to early 40's while hubby had his somewhere around his 18th birthday (which just happens to be the reason all that early hot man sex got you pregnant in the first place).
Now we hit the grand finale: "The Menopause," the Grandmother of all womanhood. It's either take the HRT and chance cancer in those now seasoned "buds" or the aforementioned Nether Regions, or, sweat like a hog in July, wash your sheets and pillowcases daily and bite the head off anything that moves. Now, you ask WHY women seem to be more spiteful than men when men get off so easy INCLUDING the icing on life's cake: Being able to pee in the woods without soaking their socks...
Now I love being a woman but "Womanhood" would make the Great Ghandi a tad crabby.
Women are the "weaker sex? Yeah right. Bite me.
<small>[ January 28, 2003, 10:13 AM: Message edited by: LostHusband ]</small>
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Bill - OK - enough said - that about sums up the truth - <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />
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Just add it all to the growing list of reasons why I'm happy to be a man. We're not even discussing clothes here!
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With women, it's always HORMONES. When men get frisky, women say it's because they're selfish unemotional uncaring [censored].
Ahem? but isn't it HORMONES too?
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With women, it's always HORMONES. When men get frisky, women say it's because they're selfish unemotional uncaring [censored].
Ahem? but isn't it HORMONES too?
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LH,
You've got some big bal*s starting a topic off like this. I see how quickly you clarified that this came from a woman. I could picture all the ladies chomping at the bit to chew you a new one.
sad dad
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You'd be cranky too if there were several days each month - like 25% of the time, sometimes - when you took off your over-the-shoulder-boulder-holder and you just wanted these large mounds of flesh to fall off.
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cinderella, How large <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> ? sad dad
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Sad Dad, I may have big ba*ls, but you're the one that's about to get slapped by our lovely Princess.... Princess, you make a valid point for those with boulders to hold but I must ask what is the excuse for those who are "boulder" challenged...???? Like my X. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
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sad dad, I'm going to pretend you didn't say that. Has the Jester been moonlighting as a manners teacher?
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<img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> And all this time I just thought it was because we never get enough sex. Silly me! ANNA <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Anna2000: <strong> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> And all this time I just thought it was because we never get enough sex. Silly me! ANNA <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Well Anna, you know I'm there for ya baby. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> I would make many sacrifises for my MB Buddies... Blind Billy, 531 days and countin.....
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Don't whine, Blind Billy. Between x and my fling <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> , I went approximately 1,946 days. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />
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cinderella,
Sorry, but you walked right into it. I couldn't pass it up.
Incidently, I'm not sure how many days it's been, but it's been 2 calender years. Pretty sad.
Thank God for Cinemax.
sad dad
<small>[ January 31, 2003, 01:13 PM: Message edited by: sad dad ]</small>
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Sad Dad, I'm not offended.
Hey, you can handle it. No put intended. All those days add up to over 5 years.
<small>[ February 01, 2003, 07:05 PM: Message edited by: cinderella ]</small>
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<img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> Read and enjoy that post fast. I'm mortified that it got to be the first one on the page. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Embarrassed]" src="images/icons/blush.gif" />
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by LostHusband: <strong> </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Anna2000: <strong> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> And all this time I just thought it was because we never get enough sex. Silly me! ANNA <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Well Anna, you know I'm there for ya baby. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> I would make many sacrifises for my MB Buddies... Blind Billy, 531 days and countin.....</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">LH, You sacrificing dude you! You are just too sweet to offer such a generous sacrifice! I can hear all MB friends running to the offer now. I hate just hate waiting in long lines! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> ANNA
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Coincidence?
> >
> >
> > It all makes sense now. I never looked at it this way before:
> > MEN tal illness
> > MEN strual cramps
> > MEN tal breakdown
> > MEN opause
> > GUY necologist......................
> > and when we have real trouble, it's a HIS terectomy.
> > Ever notice how all of women's problems start with men?
> > Send this to women you know and brighten their day.
> > Send this to men to annoy them.
> >
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widgett,
You're pretty witty this time of nite!
Hey..check out my post to No date Valentines day
<small>[ February 04, 2003, 12:16 AM: Message edited by: sunrise1 ]</small>
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