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Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 273
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Posts: 273
Jack,

You're really pissing me off!

Are you really that stupid? OR Are you suffering from depression?

Life is difficult and unfair because selfish *******s like you are in it! Beware, there's always someone out there in this world who will put you in your place.

How about giving for a change instead of taking?

YOU keep putting yourself in a mess and blaming the world. Go see "Bruce Almighty".

You keep coming back on here asking for advice when you've already been given it. You're not listening. You don't seek to understand. You only seek to get what you want. You'll find that if you don't understand, you won't get what you want.

You may be 30, but you're going on 12.

Joined: Jan 1999
Posts: 655
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Posts: 655
Well Jack have no idea where you are at. but
you can check this out click below on when
hope is lost there is something for you to read.

I think your in depression right now from your expecting something that had a different outcome and you lost face I guess..sorry..but Pull your self up by your bootstraps and get on with life now..take it like the man you think you are..
go on with life..maybe you can go do some things like enjoying yourself, getting to know who Jack really is now..go river rafting, hiking, go take pictures, go kayacking whale watching..go have fun you need to be able to enjoy being alone and liking yourself first before you enter into a relationship..take care. Keep on Keeping on!

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> Earthangel

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> When hope is lost

Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 210
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Jack72 Offline OP
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Joined: Aug 2001
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CHRIS-CA123 - What I meant by it being sad... Was not necessarily for me,b ut the world in general.

SADEYES- Thanks for your sincere concern. I am okay. Actually I think I can FINALLY really begin or finish moving on. I really have been depressed (under a dark cloud) ever since the Ex left me almost 2 yrs ago. Again nothing seems as good as it was. Perhaps it wasn;t just her..I mean it was a different time in my life. The roaring late 90s were good to just about everybody it seems. Anyway, while I know it does no good to long for the good times and pine for the past, those definitely felt like good (better) times. I never left the Current GF. She "hung in there" with me. If anything I hope to be able to have more self-confidence in my decisions going forward and to hopefully better analyze this relationship I am. While I am not brave enough to end my current relationship (even tough it may be the best) I may see if we can go on a "break" for awhile. My apprehension in braking this current relationship off comes partly from what happened with my Ex. When I started to doubt my Ex's and I's future together friends told me "hey dude just move on".. I take FULL responsibility for what happened, but it would have been nice for just one person to disagree with me and say "hey-- your Ex is great..what the hell are you doing thinking of leaving her..you lve her moron..wake up!".. Make any sense. I did give current GF the Emotional Needs Questionnaire (did it 2weeks into dating her).. It made us cry on a cuple of differences (primarily religious differences) but we decided to try anyway. I think the Emotional Needs questionaire can be valuable, but it is always subjective and then it is a matter of how much weight you give to each thign and honestly hopw much you like the person you are questioning.

Father of 1, Husband of 0-
Go ahead and be pissed off. Think whatever you want to think. At LEAST I am honest. Depressed not stupid is where I have been the last 2 years. Maybe making some occasional stupid moves based on being depressed, but ultimately I have been making moves to survive. My loss of my Ex was HUGE!!! You don't know all of what we shared together, but trust me what we had was seriously amazing for a long time (yes I know it eventualyl ended). Based on your last response I can tell that either you are living in a dream world, do not understand real life and/or people. And you obviously ahve read in between the lines incorrectly. If you were to contact A LOT of people where I am from and ask them who is the most giving persoon they know I can ASSURE you that I would be at the top of several lists. If anything I would say that I have done a lot of work to analayze my "unselfish" actions and have found that people like me who do that type of thing "doormats" are actually A-getting something out of it (aka-"selfish", like I said)and B-sometimes the most manipulative people out there. I am trying to work on that part of me. But you ahve it all wrong if you think I don't "give". I have helped countless people, helped to move hundreds, helped with home improvements, given of my time and money (til it hurt more than once), etc... In fact I think it is for that reason of "giving" that when it is not reciprocated to me (Ex and current GF) icnluded that eventually I wear out and become bitter, because the scale is so far off. Now before I get yelled at for keeping score.. I go into relationships GIVING without keeping track. It is only after like 6 months or so of "feeling" like it is not equal that my braing starts subtley "keeping score".. I am very familiar with the Giver and Taker and the dabacle of who goes first when it gets bad... Anyway... "sorry for pissing you off and being a selfish (well if I feel in the blanks it becomes 'Donkey Pit')

Joined: Jan 1999
Posts: 655
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Posts: 655
Hey Jack
Did you read the booklet I left in here?
also think it might be good for you to close this link out as the final chapter on this and open another one..to deal with the future..of you feel
you need to talk to someone don't hesitate to write me or call me out in the boards, I check them daily. I have gone through major depression and losses in my life so I do understand..rejection etc..and caring for someone severly disabled...take care and don't forget to pray, when you feel like there is no way out
look up and reach up He is there waiting you are not alone..really God does help.

sometimes I wait to long and try to do it all on my own..I have learned to cry out to Him and then it feels better..try it..it works HE never leaves us nor forsakes us..I will be 60 in aug and am suffering from heart failure now and I thought I was over the crummy stuff in my life when husband passed in Sept of 2001, then found this out..but oh well..I will go on..I don't know for how long my days are numbered and not going to be the way I planned but HE has a better idea.. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
protect your health it is the most important thing to keep you going..hey why don't you join a gym it would really be good for you, excersize makes you feel good and sitting in a hot tub afterwards is aaaaahhhhh soooo gooood..just what the doctor ordered for you... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
plus you will meet some people and they all talk in the hottub whirlpool whatever swimming pool talk about life you will be surprised when you can talk to someone who you might never see again sometimes it is better then a therapist. sometimes they are a therapist...doctor what ever.. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
Keep on Keeping on..

If you need to talk my e-mail is
earthangel@telcomplus.net

Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 210
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Jack72 Offline OP
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SADEYES- Thanks for the offer and advice. Best wishes to you... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

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