Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum

This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at mbrestored@gmail.com
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 1 of 2 1 2
Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
C
Member
Member
C Offline
Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
Well,it was two days after Christmas, but close enough.

Went out to start my car tonight - headed to dinner with a lifelong friend. Car won't run. It will start but you have to hold your foot firmly on the accelerator to keep it going. Then it races and slows down, races and slows down. If you take your foot off the accelerator, it dies.

Gotta to have it towed in tomorrow. Use my mom's car for a day or two.

Then I have to hope it is not like last time. Last time a car died on me, it cost me $800 over the course of a week. Last time a car died at Christmas, that too, was $800.

<small>[ December 29, 2003, 07:12 PM: Message edited by: cinderella ]</small>

Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 7,027
*
Member
Member
* Offline
Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 7,027
Don't ya just hate car trouble --- Mine was before Christmas - actually even before Thanksgiving but - CLOSE ENOUGH!!!

Jan

Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 5,736
E
Member
Member
E Offline
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 5,736
The three things needed for an engine to run are:

Fuel
Spark
Compression

It's unlikely that your car suddenly lost compression (I.E. a hard mechanical failure of one of the internally lubricated parts.) So they need to first look at are you getting enough fuel and is the spark strong enough.

These are both very simple tests, fuel pressure can be checked in about 5 minutes an spark can be verified pretty easily as well.

Hopefully it is something as simple as a clogged fuel filter. A failing or failed fuel pump becomes a bit more expensive as they probably have to drop the fuel tank to replace it. Most modern cars have a high pressure fuel pump in the tank.

(Just a side note, and I have to comment here. If you are in the habit of running your car down below a 1/4 tank of fuel, please consider filling up somwhere between 1/2 and 1/4 of a tank. The fuel also cools the electric fuel pump that is submerged in your tank. When the fuel level drops below a 1/4 tank, your pump is not being cooled as effectively by the fuel. In some cars, you can greatly shorten the fuel pump life.

I know, some of you are saying I don't have the money to keep all that gas in the tank. Ok, but then do you have 100X that much to raised the fuel level from under 1/4 to about 1/2 to pay for a new fuel pump. It will cost you $5-10 extra dollars ot fill the tank up all the way, and just consider 1/2 as almost empty. Sure beats $500 for a new fuel pump. Stepping off my ESTJ free advice chair now.)

Ok, more relavent to the issue here is do you trust your mechanic? Do they get things fixed the first time, or do you need to make several trips. If you have to make several trips, there is a good chance they are guessing.

Guessing is ok, as long as you and shop foreman are clear that you are not going to pay for a guess. So if he says I want to replace the left handed wind shifting sensor or some other sensor ask if this is a guess, or what diagnosis lead up to this. Even if you don't understand everything he is saying, I'm sure you have a BS detector.

I'd tell the foreman that if they replace it and it doesn't work, that he has to return your original part to the car at no cost. You can agree to pay the labor for the shop to install the part as part of the diagnosis, but if it doesn't work, the shop has to eat the labor costs to take the part out and return your original part. You only cost should be the labor to install the original part. They can return or keep as stock the guessed part and as I said before, they eat the labor to swap back in your good part. Obviously you can use your judgement on these, if it's a $20 part and costs you $60 to install it, it's probably not worth your time or the shop's time to spend another hour returning your part to save $20, YMMV.

If they don't want to play this way, get another shop, as they are probably just trying to guess on your dime.

If you have the money, I would spend the $24.95 for the first year for an Alldatadiy.com subscription for your car. You can look up fault codes, diagnostic proceedures, repair proceedures, etc. Each additional car is only $14.95 per year and renewal is that much as well.

I have it because I tinker with my own cars, but the other advantages are I can never lose the manual, it gets updated and if I print something out and get greasy finger prints all over it, I can throw it away and print a new copy if I need to.

But if it saves you $25 on a repair by helping you narrow down the problem before you take it into the shop, then you are money ahead. Diagnostic time is $60+/hour in most cases, so if you can do a few tests before it is towed, then you are not only the princess, but queen of your automotive domain.

HTH,

-jSC

<small>[ December 28, 2003, 08:04 AM: Message edited by: javaSansContour ]</small>

Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
C
Member
Member
C Offline
Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
I confess to running the car down low. I have found a full tank of gas will do me for 7 days, if I have no unexpected driving so I usually fill up every 7 days - right at 300 miles. I shall reform my ways.

Thanks for the information.

I will print and digest before talking to the mechanic. I don't have one I fully trust. I do have a place that has, seemingly, not taken me to the cleaners too badly. But trust, no, I don't trust mechanics.

Guess that comes from having been taken to the cleaners a time or two.

Thanks for your wisdom.

Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
C
Member
Member
C Offline
Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
Got 2 bottles of Iso-Heat in the car and bounced it a lot. You know, by bouncing the rear bumper up and down. Got the car to start and run.

Noticed the 'service engine soon' light has come on.

Got it to the shop, by the grace of God. The brakes now feel like the did when the vacuum assist booster went out.

I don't know if the two are related.

Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 5,736
E
Member
Member
E Offline
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 5,736
That's an important clue, it is quite possible that you have a vacuum leak or the new brake booster is faulty and leaking.

If you can find the brake booster, it is a round metal disk with a large vacuum hose attached as well as the brake master cylinder. (If you can find where the brake fluid is checked and added to your car in the owners manual you can locate the booster.)

Check that the vacuum line is securely attached. If it is, you can remove the line and cover then end of it with your finger and see if the car runs much better.

If it does, then the booster is bad and was leaking vacuum causing the car to run bad. It could be as simple as the hose just coming detached as well.

Of course, it sounds like the car is already at the shop.

Resetting a check engine light on a 1996 and newer car is pretty easy since the Federal Government has mandated OBD-II (On Board Diagnostics II) which is a set of common protocols and codes for core engine functions. So basically for this core set of codes, Ford, GM, Dodge, anybody who wants to sell cars in the USA must use these codes and a protocol that is published. No proprietary codes or protocols for core engine/emissions related monitoring.

Bottom line is that you can go to Autozone and get your codes read for free.

HTH,

-jSC

Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 777
J
Member
Member
J Offline
Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 777
Must be the season for car repairs. My sons car blew a headgasket yesterday. My H had to push him 40 miles home with the truck. Luckily my H is a mechanic. Our transmission is getting bad in the explorer, and although H can fix it still costs big bucks.

Merry Merry Christmas!

Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 4,063
A
Member
Member
A Offline
Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 4,063
Cinderella,

Sorry to hear that! I had the same major Christmas surprise. When the mechanic told me it would cost $1,000, I said, "Let me call you back." Hang up and cried, ALOT of crying.

Is this the same car with no heat and no lighter that works as last year or a different car?

Take care & chin up!

Anna

Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
C
Member
Member
C Offline
Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
God is great. God is good. Let us thank him for not being taken to the cleaner by the mechanic

When I went by the shop this morning, I told them I had thought it was a fuel line problem until I realized the brakes weren't right. Therefore, I suspected an airflow problem somewhere.

I had a leak in the brake vacuum lines and in another vacuum line. They retorqued the vacuum assist booster and tightened up some other things. There was also a leak in a vacuum hose elbow. Total charge $72.

Anna, this is not the old blue car with no heat, no air, and so many other problems. I bought this car last summer - a 1996 Lumina, full 10 years newer than the other car. Sold that one to a co-worker who drove it to work one day, it was hit by a delivery truck which took off the right front lights and was totalled out for $1700- more than 4 times what he paid for it. Then he sold it for $200 because the insurance co did not make him surrender the old thing.

Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 5,736
E
Member
Member
E Offline
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 5,736
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by cinderella:
<strong> God is great. God is good. Let us thank him for not being taken to the cleaner by the mechanic

When I went by the shop this morning, I told them I had thought it was a fuel line problem until I realized the brakes weren't right. Therefore, I suspected an airflow problem somewhere.

I had a leak in the brake vacuum lines and in another vacuum line. They retorqued the vacuum assist booster and tightened up some other things. There was also a leak in a vacuum hose elbow. Total charge $72.

Anna, this is not the old blue car with no heat, no air, and so many other problems. I bought this car last summer - a 1996 Lumina, full 10 years newer than the other car. Sold that one to a co-worker who drove it to work one day, it was hit by a delivery truck which took off the right front lights and was totalled out for $1700- more than 4 times what he paid for it. Then he sold it for $200 because the insurance co did not make him surrender the old thing. </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I'm glad I read your last post about the brakes and the booster. That was a very important clue.

I was going down the wrong path, until you mentioned that, and yes a vacuum test also is a important as well as simple check.

Glad it all worked out. Can you help me fix my marriage? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

-jSC

Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 4,063
A
Member
Member
A Offline
Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 4,063
Oh what wonderful news!!!!

I also had thought you bought a newer car but wasn't for sure. I am glad you have a heater this winter as I thought about you going to Arkansas and wondered if you did now. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Anna

Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
C
Member
Member
C Offline
Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
Java, thanks for your advice the other night. At the time, I didn't know the brake thing was going on. I truly appreciate your time.

I think it was terrific that things turned out as they did. I have found talking to men about car things and house repair things, asking questions of service people, going to hardware/parts stores and asking questions, and listening to "Car Talk" are all helpful.

I also love it when I take the car in and tell them I have an idea what is wrong and I turn out to be right.

I am the woman!!!!!

Anna - last winter was really tough. REALLY TOUGH!! Harder than the hot and humid summers when all you have is the 460 air conditioning. (Roll all 4 windows down and drive 60 miles an hour.) I'm sorry to hear about your son's car. Last winter, in one week, I had to spend $800 on my old blue bomb.

I love my 'new' car - and it is paid for.

Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 5,736
E
Member
Member
E Offline
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 5,736
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by cinderella:
<strong> Java, thanks for your advice the other night. At the time, I didn't know the brake thing was going on. I truly appreciate your time.

I think it was terrific that things turned out as they did. I have found talking to men about car things and house repair things, asking questions of service people, going to hardware/parts stores and asking questions, and listening to "Car Talk" are all helpful.

I also love it when I take the car in and tell them I have an idea what is wrong and I turn out to be right.

I am the woman!!!!!

Anna - last winter was really tough. REALLY TOUGH!! Harder than the hot and humid summers when all you have is the 460 air conditioning. (Roll all 4 windows down and drive 60 miles an hour.) I'm sorry to hear about your son's car. Last winter, in one week, I had to spend $800 on my old blue bomb.

I love my 'new' car - and it is paid for. </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Car Talk is a weekly stable, and with WW out of the house, I don't hear complaints about it when I listen.

(I'm sorta equal opportunity with a good balance of NPR as well as O'Reilly, Hannity and Limbaugh, FWIW.)

I won Car Talk's web based trivia contest years ago, and got a box of one of everything from the Shameless Commerce Divsion.

Of course, I even did that wrong according to WW, as the people the month before got some kind of travel certificate she said she'd rather have.

Nope, couldn't be proud of me for being the winner, had to complain about the prize <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />

Anyway, glad the car thing worked out. I was out looking at another one tonight. I'm going to pay cash for one, the thought of car payments right now doesn't appeal to me.

-jSC

Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
C
Member
Member
C Offline
Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
Well, I was proud of myself for finding ways to pay cash for the new buggy. I don't think I ever want to deal with another car note. I hope this car can hold on for many more years.

So, what are you thinking of buying.

FWIW, every now and then I get the answer to the CT puzzler right. On the recap the week after it's offered. It amazes my children.

One of everything from Shameless Commerce? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />

Did you get the email that they are going to close the car talk adviser portion of their website? Is that the bulletin board where you can ask questions? NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 5,736
E
Member
Member
E Offline
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 5,736
I drove a 1988 Porsche 944S a few weeks ago, looked at a new Mazda 3s on Saturday and looked at a VW GTI today (too rusty, looked like oil in the coolant)

I'm going to look at a Miata tomorrow <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

This will be a toy/backup car as I'm driving my work car.

-jSC

Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 4,063
A
Member
Member
A Offline
Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 4,063
Well, it wasn't my son's car. He doesn't have a car. It was my car!

This is my year to be full of expenses. I am amazed as I look back at my last two months.
My heater broke, couldn't fix that one so I am using space heaters this year. Among a million other thing, car brakes $400.00, plumbing, car repairs $1,000.00, dryer is breaking and I can only use it when I am home as I have to turn it off manually, microwave caught fire, can't replace it yet, I messed up on paying my car insurance so I had to come up with $1200 up front. Uninsured motorist claim on my auto $200.00.

Every time I think I'm reached in the bottom of the barrel and there is nothing left, some how I have to reach deeper. I keep thinking how in the world do I get the money but some how each time I do.

When something breaks lately I just laugh because I expect it.

Pray tonight for me because I asked for a raise today and my boss said that he has been thinking of this as well but we need to look at our books. I need this raise so, so badly! OF course as soon as I get it, something else will break, guaranteed, but at least I'll have the raise to fix it. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

Also, it is great to know that you have a better car. I hope your job is going better as well!

Take care,

Anna

Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
C
Member
Member
C Offline
Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
My job is NOT getting better. I get 1.75 days of annual leave and 1 cay of sick leave per month. I am a single mom with 2 school aged children - one of whom sees a psychiatrist every 4-8 weeks and a counselor about every 2 weeks because of his ADHD. Don't know when either will end. We've been doing this for about 6 years. And I am trying to find another school for him for next year so I have to miss some time for that. Plus, his school has this and that 1/2 day. Lots of them. So, I use my sick and annual leave. Not all of it but about 6 hrs each month - minimum. Plus those occaisional non med related absences.

My manager hates people who use their leave. Therefore, I get no skill-building opportunities. None. Zip. Nada.

They resent my using my earned leave and I resent them for resenting it.

Plus, I am very good at what I do. Not the fastest but VERY good. I am the one to whom they give the calls when a claimant has to be called back so that central office can be notified because the claimant had contacted them reporting trouble getting their unemployment claim filed or resolved.

They won't give me other opportunities because I am so good at doing that.

Someone who knows less than I know is quality controlling my work. He brought me two claims the other day and said I made the wrong decision on them and he had changed it. I told him he needed to check his info source because I thought he was wrong. I was right. And a supervisor brought me a claim that was two weeks old and needed more information because central office couldn't process it without a different form. He hadn't caught the fact that the wrong form had been completed.

So, I'm working along doing the best I can. Grateful to have a very secure civil service job in state government where layoffs are possible but very rare. And I don't have to take it home. I can't take it home even if I want to. I have benefits.

Life could be worse.

I know what you mean about hemorraging money for repairs. I need my house painted. My microwave has issues. My dishwasher needs a repair. I will need new tires and a $300 brake job within a year. My mortgage is $650, tuition $550, insurance $125, electric $135, son will need new glasses soon, daughter needs to get her braces, son will need them soon too.

There is no bottom to the money pit.

I am so sorry about your car. I have been there. I have been there SOOOOOOOOOOOOO often. I don't know how but somehow, when I am against the ropes, God keeps coming through.

Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 4,063
A
Member
Member
A Offline
Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 4,063
Cinderella,

Your life mirrors mine an awful lot. My son is going to see a Psychiatrist and a Psychologist and like you I have very little help with taking him there. I also get 1 day a month which is considered vacation and sick time. The only good thing about that is that if I don't abuse it I can take a few hours off with out getting debited on my 12 days a year off, but it never seems like enough with all the appointments!

My son has also been diagnosed with ADD and depression.

Like you, I have no financial security right now.

Have you considered furthering you education on weekends. It is something I am considering doing. We need to get out of this rut we are in this year.

A difference I do see is that I am more happier with my job than you as my boss is pretty good about not pressuring me to not use my days. I did have a boss like that, it was the one that paid me more money than I am making now with all the little perks he gave me but he have never let me take the time off I am taking at this job and my son must have this help. The stress would have been enormous.

I know it is a tough decision but I think it is time you consider the possibility of looking for another job if you haven't already been doing that.

My boss did tell me I got my raise, but hasn't shared with me the amount yet so I hope I am not disappointed. I don't know if it'll be enough so I am considering a second job on the side or furthering my knowledge in my field with more education.

Do you know if your ex has got any raises? I have heard so many stories of the primary caregiver taking exes back to court to get more child support and learning that the ex was making tons more money. That may also be an option to you.

This year we are gonna have a better year girl, I just feel it! I think the motto "score in four is a good one!"

Take care,

Anna

<small>[ January 01, 2004, 12:40 PM: Message edited by: Anna2000 ]</small>

Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 7,027
*
Member
Member
* Offline
Joined: Sep 2001
Posts: 7,027
Just a tip - ladies...

Furthering your education maybe a really good option. Consider locating *stipends* on which to gain higher education and look for them. Random searches sometimes locate the best information. Be sure to search through all the companies similar to yours and any resources you may have locally. Sometimes it's an unexpected resource that gets you a stipend or scholarship that pays for college costs and some living costs.

Blessings,

Jan

Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
C
Member
Member
C Offline
Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
Anna, what meds does the psychiatrist have your son on? I've noticed a big change in son's overall mood with his last med change. He's on Straterra now. A lot of children at his school are on it - but it does not work for everyone (his best friend's father works for Eli Lilly which markets Straterra but it nothing for the friend).

Jan - I have a bachelor's degree in Communications w/ art and English minors. Plus a technical cert in Photography - which amounts to another major.

I've thought of going back to school. But I really don't have the time to get off from work, go to school, get children in bed at a decent time. And I see them precious little as it is. I could consider a distance MBA offered by a well known state school in my area but I don't know that it would equip me to do anythin I WANT to do.

Page 1 of 2 1 2

Link Copied to Clipboard
Forum Search
Who's Online Now
0 members (), 412 guests, and 95 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newest Members
Limkao, Emily01, apefruityouth, litchming, scrushe
72,034 Registered Users
Latest Posts
Three Times A Charm
by Vallation - 07/24/25 11:54 PM
How important is it to get the whole story?
by still seeking - 07/24/25 01:29 AM
Annulment reconsideration help
by abrrba - 07/21/25 03:05 PM
Help: I Don't Like Being Around My Wife
by abrrba - 07/21/25 03:01 PM
Following Ex-Wifes Nursing Schedule?
by Roger Beach - 07/16/25 04:21 AM
My wife wants a separation
by Roger Beach - 07/16/25 04:20 AM
Forum Statistics
Forums67
Topics133,625
Posts2,323,524
Members72,035
Most Online6,102
Jul 3rd, 2025
Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
Copyright © 2025, Marriage Builders, Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Site Navigation
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 8.0.0