Hi Peachy-

Glad to hear your date went well. Take your time and enjoy.

Sorry to hear that you are feeling down. I think it is the time of the year.

Don't second guess the things that you have done, they happened the way they did for a reason. I too often think I should have divorced my XH immediately, but then I am reminded that in spite of everything, I did all that I could to save my marriage, just as you did. You are now able to live a life free of guilt, something our X's and their OW wives will never have.

I hope your day is going better, but know that it is because your son is back home!

Take care and God bless!
K

JustPeachy! Hey there!! I'm from just north of you I believe - just up I75 - also in GA. Anyway, I've had quite a first "season" after divorce too. I have to thank you for the thread and insights you've posted.

I followed your xbf saga for awhile some time back. Sounds like that was one of those early after D relationships that was destined to fail in my opinion. Too many emotional mines lying around to be stepped on....????

Anyway, yes, it's been a crazy year for sure. I too am looking at Christmas decorations and trying to decide what to do on my first Christmas divorced.....it's just not easy.

I think the emotional roller coaster effect is just so common to us all. Expect it!! Is what I keep telling myself. Aren't we just thrilled that God understands and doesn't deal harshly with us as we unpack all of this unwanted garbage & deal with it?

What I find unique is that I'm jetting around the country so much that in some ways it puts my recovery into a different dimension. When I'm home, it feels different. There I have to process the big ole empty house with all the "stuff" that needs to be done / addressed. On the road (tonight I'm in Houston, TX), there are other issues to confront - like loneliness, no one to call, trying to keep up with domestic needs by remote control, etc.

Anyway, this first year I would never wish to repeat, but on the other hand, I've probably never grown more!!!!

We gotta keep looking at the "WIN" in all of this for us!!!!

Freedom. Personal space. Personal Growth. No more fights at home. No more unfaithfulness by our x's. No more wondering where we stand. No more having to worry about being abandoned!

The best thing you said to me here was...to be careful as the BS that if someone comes along meeting even a small % of our emotional needs we can fall for them.

I'm a very desirable "Catch" according to the many friends & family who know me well. Stable & dependable. Mature. Focused. Truly Romantic. Very Handsome. Sexy in & out of the bedroom. Financially secure. Adventurous. Charismatic when I walk into a room. Spiritually tuned in to God. These are words folks have used to describe me.

I'm certain that each of our friends & family could also describe each of us in similar good terms. That helps me / us to keep in mind that we shouldn't SETTLE easily for just anyone who comes along.

I have this saying: God already knows the name & address of the person I'm best suited for. My job is to stay close enough to Him that He can point her out to me when His timing is just right!

A blessed Christmas to you filled with the healing only the Babe of Bethlehem can bring to your soul!
High Flight

Hi Peachy,

I hope today's better for you. It was a rough weekend for me, too. Maybe it's all the smaltzy holiday commercials getting to me. Anyhow, just when I thought I'd just sit in my house forever and never leave and, years from now, someone would find my mummified remains.........I went tangoing with a European friend (a handsome, straight European friend.)

'Tis a fine thing, tangoing with a European friend. Europeans tend to dance a bit, er, closer than American men do. A bit disconcerting, but wonderful for the ego.
So.....I'm revived.

Take care of yourself this season of smaltz. You mean a lot to a bunch of us here.

Oh, and Justin, thanks for tip about the ring. I never thought of that.

Peachy, You said: </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Sometimes I just wish I had taken action quicker. But his family and my former church told me to give it time, work on things, and wait it out...I know. You have 99 great days and 1 bad one now and then.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Here's a great line from Maya Angelou: </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">If I'd a' known better, I'd a' done better.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Besides, if we'd filed for divorce on D'day, wouldn't we then always wonder, "What if?"

As for the one bad day every now and then, remember the holiday blues, less sunshine, your son's been with XH, as well as the difficult IV. I'm sure the bad day's now behind you, your son is home, you've probably at least spoken with the handsome interventional radiologist, and you're back on day one or two of 99.

Good Reply LetsTry.

You are so right. For me, I had to know that I gave 110% before I gave up! That was very key for me.
For those of us who tried to fix our marriages, we did that for ourselves. We needed to know, that we weren't quitters.
There came the time though, where we had to realize, we can't fix all things.

Peachy, I'm sure you gave it all you had! Try not to think you should have done it sooner, different etc...
I think it takes each of us our own time to get to the point of no return. The timeline is different for each of us.

Have a good weekend.
K.

Finally got up all the holiday stuff. looks great. Turns out the radiologist is into dating as many women as he can fit into his blackberry schedule. I heard back from him, but he said that he had "to be upfront" and that along with me, was seeing other people he had met before me. I reply (and using my recent knowledge gained), "sure...doing the same thing myself". So he's trying to figure out his head from his backside. I am not going to worry. Just one frog in the sea of frogs. So...I changed my profile to read a bit differently: says in part about who I'd like to meet :A man comfortable with who he is yet never complacent in his life; also a man within my specified age range and one honest in his quest for that special person". There. I hope that will ward off some more James Bond-esque froggies.

Am feeling blaaaaah. Son has to have some dental surgery next wed. Seems the x didn't take care of a bad cavity my son had back in may. He told me when he took him after I took son in april for checkup that "the little cavity may need some work on it". Well, he pays a down payment, then revokes the down payment b/c he says "it's too long to wait for an appointment" (a three week wait). Now, I have this medically verified that my x did nothing about this nor did he ask me. He only wanted to know when MY DENTAL INSURANCE KICKED IN. Incidentally, mine kicked in august 1. Interesting thing is, the x is bound to pay for all dental expenses that my ins. doesn't cover and if I didn't have dental, he paid for it. Also he pays for sons medical insurance and the same...so he was basically waiting for my dental to kick in and made my son's cavity get much worse...Now he has to have alot of sedation and has 2 cavities. Getting 1 root canal btw. On a back molar. I got son to dentist hours after he told me wednesday that it was hurting..his jaw that is. Now he's scheduled for wednesday morning and is on oral antibiotics. Son by nature has porous teeth. and most dentists, including the group we go to, does not put sealants on children this young. Said around eight or so. And yea, they tried to give me a month wait on the repair, but I argued with them and told them how I know medical schedules are made and that they must learn to triage their patients better...thus my son gets bumped up in the schedule two weeks <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

I am down and feel like I am a slug. My son exclaims as we put the angel on the tree "gee mom. You like alot of gold stuff on our tree..It's pretty. Family Values likes only silver. She says she HATES gold on trees." Wow. A golddigger that hates gold. Hmmm. I would assume that my x told her how I did my trees before and she's doing the "tree busting 180" or something stupid like that. Incidentally, x went bezerk again when I approached him about HIS NEGLIGENCE

OOPS...hit the reply button too early by accident.

His negligence in the tooth issue and I told him that my new lawyer would have the dental and dentist records on this one...that he should begin to rethink the way the decree is worded and that some change my come in near future. He went nutso. When he is at fault on anything, he goes wacko. After 2 hours or so, he calls me and is calmer. He claims to pay me the 400 down payment for the sedation/anesthesia that the insurance won't cover. I swear. He's mad.

Skipped dinner party and birthday for a close friend of mine b/c son feels yucky. Today we're going to the mall to pick up some new boots for me (cute ones) and a skirt. I swear, I don't have that much cute clothes and there's a sale going on at one of my fav. stores. Also going to best buy to get printer supplies and also to price portable dvd players. Tonight son and I are going to watch "national treasure" and have a family outing night.

Fell off the diet bandwagon this week after the huge letdown from the christmas party, the playboy doctor dating experience, and the whole incident involving my son. I guess you could call this week "BAD DEALINGS WITH ALL " week. I guess deep down I realize that 1)my xbf has turned into a complete player but not very good at it...he's still confused and is trying to do the online "turbo date" thing that the radiologist is doing. 2)I refuse to go out with any turbo daters ever again.

I have a query for those single...Being I am a traditional southern girl, does the girl herself send a wink or an email to a guy she thinks is cute? I have not done ONE thing about that. Not at all. I have only responded to those who have either winked at me or emailed me.

Methinks there are a disparaging number of hugh heffner wannabe frogs in atlanta. Bleech.

So I will not worry about any frogs. Nope. I am just going to take care of the little fella and have a good time with him. He is the best.

Guess it's the first christmas divorced blues kicking in. The x and his little ho hoho are playing house and complaining about how she hates the color gold in all christmas decorations (the bulk of my decor I used to have even though I have bought new stuff.)

Email me guys if you have it. I am in the dumpster this weekend.

Hey Peachy,

Sorry to hear about your little guy.
I don't know if my daughter's would be the same our not, but she has had 3 crowns done. Like mini root canals.
This was done between the age of 5 and 8 if I remember right.
I wanted to let you know, that she did fine, and never complained one bit with it.
I hope that eases your mind some.
As for the X, I know about that.
My oldest daughter had a life threatening illness. She still gets routine MRI's.
What I'm about to say will make you livid.
Just about 3 weeks ago, X pulled daughter aside, and showed her the bill that he has to pay for HER MRI. Is that low?? I think it is.
I don't know what these men think. It's all about them, and their new babes!
At the time, they wanted these other women so bad, they didn't care the cost. Move on down the line, now things are bothersome!

Sorry to hear about the guy. What a jerk! Have to say though, you had the best response! Right back at em!!

Have a good night.
You will like National Treasure. I took my girls on Thanksgiving night to see it.

Have a good weekend.
K.

Peachy, Of course you can send a wink. That is the equivalent of flirting with a guy you are interested in at a party. It's just a flirt, but the quiet, shy nice-guys will appreciate it.

Hey-- I liked your post and this thread.
Nice to meet you!
I'm skeptical of on line dating or dating services in general. I think I read somewhere that the typical person who uses them is all about themselves, and looking for somone to meet their needs, not to see if the match is a good one.
That said, I tried it once, and made a nice friend, whom I later inadvertantly introduced to his next girlfriend.
So, with that in mind-- you never know where it could lead!
I'd take it slow. Turbo daters are lame, but maybe aren't bad as friends only-- you know, not intimate friends, but people to invite to a huge party?
It's all about networking.
Hope your son is recovering well. Single motherhood at Christmas always made me feel conneceted to Mary and Jesus (when Joseph wasn't around.) Somehow it was holy.
Take care,
LC

Oh Karona...I am giving you a big hug. ((((K)))). What a loser. I cannot believe he did that. What made me sooo mad was he LET the cavity go on so long. Even cancelled the appointment and got back his lousy 175 bucks bacj and never rescheduled or let me know...

Am keeping this stuff in my file I have now started about six mos. ago..yea, called the "x" file. and when I have enough and enough money, will go after him and right a few wrongs for my son. My attorney said that it "teeters on the line of full blown neglect" and that it could be a key piece in what you are going to do. It shows a pattern of him first, everybody else get in line.

Justin, good idea. What can a wink hurt? It is not sleazy. I just don't have time to puruse the internet trying to pick out cuties. I just let them kinda come my way. But maybe if I get a quiet moment today, I could check out tha frog pond here in ga.

Lucy...love your sig line. I need to live like that. And you're right about the turbo's out there. I just don't get that mentality. They are trying to date as many and then out of the many, select the few...I didn't sign up for "the bachelor". and I do not compete for anything. In fact, I think they should be lucky I chose to even go to dinner with them. I think he was trying to say that 1)he had a good time but 2)he is still going to date around as he used the line "I have to be upfront about this". Oh well. Loser. Learned years ago in psych classes (was a psych minor before I went to do what I do now) that if you want to make your point clear and show the absolute absurdity of somebody's words or actions, then mirror them back to the person. Very little used to work with the x. But when I'd mirror his actions (except for the insane ones), he'd lose it. He would freak out and accuse me from cheating to everything else in the book. I just hate doing that though. Life should NOT be this much work. Thus, I don't do the work.

Right as I was signing off, my cell was ringing and the xbf was calling. I am not the demure southern belle I was...well maybe 30-40% less demure belle...I left him a email on wed. letting him know that I thought he'd been jerky for the last 3 months and that when I had gotten less mad in a few days, I'd call him and discuss things. That's one change I do now. Think first, react later. And if there's a .01 chance I will react inappropriately or say something I could regret, then I just wait and think about the issue before confronting it. Then I take it head on. He is all nice and kind. I tell him basically some stuff that's been on my mind and then I tell him it was jerky that I go and hang out with him (his asking) after the xmas party last weekend (we talked and goofed off for about 2-3 hours)that he didn't call me back later in the week to say if he had found my cell phone, which I lost. I told him that you don't treat somebody you spent that much time with that way. He says..."Oh my gosh..I have been WAITING months for you to do this." I say what???? He replies that "it's so awesome that you finally just say what you think and let it rip rahter than being so polite. This is a huge step for you." Arrrrgh. I tell him to not forget that I am mad at him. He then tries to be nice and talks to me about son trying to diffuse me. Then he goes on to say that he's glad he hung out with me because my chaperones were not doing too good a job being my chaperones. Then he went on to say that "everybody at work is kinda confused. they sorta guess now we broke up b/c we didn't sit together at dinner, but that they saw us leave and they think it is YOU who are the one who doesn't know what they want." I laugh. Laugh alot. A change in attitude does change other people's perceptions of you.

Will somebody tell Orchid about the next part?

In case you guys don't know, here's how the ridiculous break up occurred.We'd been dating on/off since early march. I knew him six months prior, but refused to date him b/c I was legally married still...Just wanted to be friends. Got d'd at end of December after a long separation. About august, the end of august he had started acting really wierd. Looking tense at times, I could almost see him struggling with the "what do I do next" thing. We were dating just each other, but hadn't said the L word. One day after he leaves the er, he drives over at midnight to tell me that "he wanted to work on things and try to make our relationship work and be something that would last. That he wanted this." He was very resolute. Two days later, I am in the lab and he comes up. He finds out I am asked to Harry Connick concert by a guy friend of mine. Just a friend. Then announces that I should go if I want to..that I can DATE who I want to, as long as they don't touch me. I freaked out. I told him that was the stupidest thing I've ever heard. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Mad]" src="images/icons/mad.gif" /> Then he began the really wierd stuff. But as a MB veteran, you can now see crap flying at you before anybody else can. Meanwhile, my best friend, the model/computer hacker with a masters' in computers using bare bones info,(age, height race profession) finds him on a yahoo dating site...she found him within 10 mintues of talking to me. So I never tell him about it and I start dating other people and three or four days later we break up amicably. He never found out.

About 2 mos. ago, two of my friends decide to do the online thing. And my best friend tells me "well it will be interesting to see how long it takes the xbf to find out YOU have a profile out there in internetland too". He was incidentally on another site, not even on the same site I am on...

About 2 weeks ago, I am checking email and see the "winks" I've received. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> One of them is from the xbf. His little foray into yahoo didn't work so it seems he put his profile up on the site I am on and found me almost immediately...he he he he he. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" /> So I pretend I don't see it and do not mention it for a week. I called him up about a week ago to ask him about a patient I had who had seizures during my procedure(he used to work in neuro). I say "well gotta go" and he says "wait a minute. I need to know HOW LONG you have had that thing online". I tell him "not very" and that "I am sure yours has been up much longer than mine has".

So yesterday I tell him that I considered it jerky that he had his up at the end of when he dated me on yahoo. He then said he had it up before he and I had ever gone out. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> I tell him that it is jerky. He was actually rather quiet when I told him. He then said, what do you want from me? What do we want? I said that I wanted to be single for a while longer. He said he wasn't ready this second to settle down yet. That he didn't have enough down payment for the house he was looking at and the one he told me about & showed me pics of. I then tell him that I don't want to wait too long to settle down, but that am going to live a little now but going to want to in the near future. He says that he's not ready this very second but that it could change. I say to him before I get off the phone that "well we want the same thing. I am just wanting time to be me & 2 b free. You want extra time to make sure you've gotten the best thing out there. If you're willing to risk the best thing to chase a whole lot of "what if's" out there go for it." He said "Ok. I know that you're probably getting tons of emails every day. It's just not like that for a guy." I tell him "that's sad. I DO get tons of emails. I don't even have to search. I guess it's just like that for me." He then says a few things, is nice, said we will talk a bit more, and is imho, sounding dejected by end of call.

So that's where the xbf and I stand. At least now I can grab the bull by the horns now. And waiting to use information at a later and more appropriate time works well...learned that from Orchid. Her reverse babble technique works in many different sitchs.. I do miss the xbf. Somehow, I don't believe the chickiepoos are flocking to him like they would to the radiologist. Oh well, I will let him find out the hard way that I am the best thing...if I am still single by then. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Peachy, That is quite a story. Your exbf sounds a bit unsure of himself to me. Or in MB terms, he is a cake eater. I think he wants his Peachy and his other girl friends, too.

I am doing a lot of things in m life, but really not meeting many eligible women my age. I meet some 30 year olds, and some 60+ year olds, but no many in that late 40's to mid 50's where I am.
Maybe they all are remarried by the time they hit 50???

So, I continue. I do like the idea of changing routine. I am a creature of habit and my habits are very efficient. So, I don't get out of the box very often. Hmmm... Maybe today, I will shop at a different grocery store!! What a wild and crazy thing to do!

Yea, he may be a cake eater and a half. AT worst he is a pie eater. That is, he actually ate one of my sweet potatoe pies I made for thanksgiving. I made 2 for the work party, and he wanted to bring one home, the one that didn't get eaten. I said sure. Yea, I guess I literally enabled the "pie eater" to eat more pie...lol! And live on the edge and do one thing different out of your darn routine. Live out on the edge my man!

Got in a verbal disagreement w/the xh today...he calls and we are working on the christmas exhange/visitation stuff. Somehow we get on the subject of my last name. He says to me that I "never got my name legally changed back to my maiden name". I reply that I never legally got my maiden name changed to my married name ever. He says that it doesn't matter what the social security card or my birth certificate says, that "IT IS MY MARRIAGE CERTIFICATE THAT SAYS I AM A Smith (not my married name, just an example)..." Wow. I replied that on the marriage certificate it said "Peachy Doe and Sith Lord Smith" were married on April whatever, blah blah blah..and the minister signed it. I said that it does not change my name legally. That the church doctrine and the legalities are separate. He is quiet. He says then "well for your son's name, you are Smith. You ARE PEACHY SMITH WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT. YOU HAVE MY NAME".

Oops I did it again...

hit reply again before I was done.

So to that I say, "well the divorce should make any marriage certificate null and void right? " The marriage is null and void. He says back "well just because the marriage is NOT IN FORCE

ARRRRGH. I DID IT AGAIN.

"JUST BECAUSE THE MARRIAGE IS NOT IN FORCE DOES NOT MEAN THAT YOU ARE NOT PEACHY SMITH."

Ok. I am going to get this early reply button thing under control now.

So I tell him that it's ironic that he cites the church's stance on the legality of my name as the basis...and that it is ironic because the church DOES NOT recognize his marriage to family values either..He gets mad. I say, well if you are going to side with the church, then you should side with it 100% not when you feel like siding with it. He then claims I did not sign any form to get my attorneys to file that motion. I say that I told my attorneys I never had my maiden name changed via the social security office. That my attorneys said I was still Peachy Doe in the eyes of Uncle Sam. He then said the ultimate..."well, Peachy Doe is not near as good as having SMITH as a last name." I say that is laughable. I tell him then firmly that "I CHOOSE TO CARRY THE NAME OF MY FATHER, WHO WAS A GOOD MAN." He says that he doesn't care. That he knows I am Peachy Smith and that if I want to continue to call myself Peachy Doe then I can take that up with my next husband. I say good...because like you said "this marriage is no longer in force."

Like my marriage was an insurance policy or something. He just words things so wierdly. Like he's really afraid to ever say what he did and when I correct him to say that he's sided with the church in that I should keep my married name which goes along with the fact that in the eyes of the church, his new marriage isn't valid, he freaks out.

He is a supreme cake eater. And he shall never have cake nor pie from me again. I mean, can you believe that?

And for the record, my name is neither Doe nor Smith. I have an unusual maiden name that I am proud to carry. For my son, I hyphenate my maiden name and married name. But to those in atlanta, I am Peachy Doe...I choose to accept the name of my father...who, in stark contrast to the sith lord, aka my xh, was a very good man.

Peachy, one question, and I don't mean to sound like a wise guy. Why are you arguing about your last name with your ex husband? He has no right to tell you what you name is or can be. You can change it to Zelda Quecumber if you want.

Why waste time telling him anything about your personal life?

I like that one. Peachy Quecumber. That is pretty cool. He's just 1 huge, gigantic cake eater...his ego is so inflated now that he can't possibly imagine a woman not wanting HIS name. I don't even get it.

I don't even know how we got into that one. It just flew in outta nowhere. Oh, I know..he asked me if any "private investigators or attorneys" have called me asking about him...seems his old legal matters are resurfacing again with this old company he used to have...there was a large lawsuit against him about four years ago and I think that's what pushed him over the veritable edge of sanity...supposedly they're calling him again and he's afraid they will call me and I will blow the whistle on him...I just don't do the revenge thing, just let time take care ofhis negative karma. But when it's time to do the legal thing and take care of these loose ends, it will not be about revenge, it will be about just doing the right things. Oh, in the end, the name thing went like this...I told him that I would bet the investigator wouldn't know who I was because I am listed in directory assistance and because I am known here in GA by my maiden name and I hyphenate it with my former last name.

Ms. Quecumber, err... Peachy,

If you aren't effected by your ex's business problems I would advise keeping quiet. Unless, of course, you are required to testify under oath in court. Then you must tell the truth.

No I am not affected by his lawsuits..but it could affect any future monies owed me as he has lied so much about assets he holds.

I have had a very very poopy day. I will not elaborate other than 1)son had his surgery and creid and cried and cried. I had to work and xh went with son (it was his fault the entire thing happened anyway...no follow up to the dentist and didn't inform me for 6 mos.) 2)son is not home and I can't hug him for being such a good boy...he did great btw. 3)the xbf has done something to make me soooo mad...we have always kept anything between he and I just between he and I. Seems now that the christmas party is over, he is wanting to be big stud at the office and is basically bragging how I left with him and although now everybody pretty much knows that he and I dated for 6 months, some are still confused that he and I are what? I don't talk about anything, but seems he and the other docs are...one of the nurse practicioners I am friends with said that "your xbf/bf/whatever he is needs to keep your personal information personal. Too many people are interested in YOUR business. He needs to shut up." When he and I left, we talked for a few hours and yes, I did kiss him..but what the heck? We dated for six months. Seems now after the party, and after people finally saw what I look like not wearing scrubs and a labcoat, that they are all interested in me and my life, etc. Especially my personal life. Seems some of the married older docs are living vicariously thru my xbf. I am ready to blow my stack. She, my buddy the np told me that she thought the best way to deal with the whole thing is to ignore him and it. And to not talk to him for a while..that way he'd figure out something is up and then I can approach it. We no longer work at same office so that's cool. And also the company I work for has me under a long contract with them, but I can also have the ability to move around if I want to b/c there's not many people in my specialty. I am all about peace and just wanting life to be good. Why is it some guys (and girls too) can be immature jaca@@es? I don't get it. From where I come from, if you're the belle of the ball, then prince charming escorts you...not an icky playboy wanna be..suddenly I am viewed differently by the guys and he wants to be king stufmuffin. King studmuffin has dated "that girl". King Studmuffin and "that girl" left after the party. King Studmuffin is single and doesn't know what he wants. "that girl" almost tied down king studmuffin and he doesn't like that idea. What he did was basically tell the guys how I wasn't feeling well, how he took care of me for a few hours (had ice bag on my head), and it sounded like I was over there much longer...and then casually mentioned to one or two of them that we were "unsure" about what we should do and that we were "backing off" from things and had done so for a while but "you never know" and that "he just needed some time to see what's out there before committing " and that "she's not going anywhere that fast (refering to my romantic life and the possibility I could rebound w/somebody else.)" So I am fuming. Really fuming. My buddy the np said it was making her nauseous being in the room hearing it and that when she turned around to look at him, he finally realized she was in the room and he shut up. She said it was an old fashioned $issing contest and he wanted to one up them. And that one of the docs, whom I get along with, told him that he should "just shut up and see me and do what he needs to do in his other time but that he wouldn't let me go either". So that is a doc friend of mine telling my xbf that he should date me, but still be roaming around or at least looking around and basically CAKE EAT.

Bleeeech. I did what cassy said to do and all I did was nothing. But then at 2 pm got call from my former coworker and a guy who's very pro peachy from home office and he had to leave (emergency) so I needed to see last seven patients. So I drove down there (bleech...xbf's office), walked upstairs into our lab area, and just did my patients and then left. The xbf drove up and came in about 10 min before I left the office but I did not see him thakfully or I might have drop kicked the man over the moon. The office was being nice and was forwarding calls to me about my son's dental procedure and I was a little upset still about that. My old co worker jOhn (very pro peachy and guy who went off on xbf once) said in front of the office staff "I can guess who was stupid and probably caused all the ruckus with the dentist. It's that idiot x's fault. Lemme just go and I will take care of it...he just needs to be dragged slowly by me in my new lexus down a gravel road...slowly. I say in response.."gee John. Thanks for the colorful fantasy...but hey, do you think you could manage to drag 2 PEOPLE