CD,<P>It came through and I have sent a reply. <P>Everyone else,<P>we seem to be working things out...<P>love<BR>- heavenly

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>BTW, swallowing is over-rated (don't ask me how I know ...)<P>love<BR>- heavenly<HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>BWWAAAHHHHHHWWWWWW!!!BWWAAAHHHHHHWWWW!!!!<BR>You can tell me I won't say a thing.....<P><BR> <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>she figured the fact that I do is the only reason my h went back to me. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P><BR>Me too cd....but I had braces in 94 maybe it was never the same.<P>On a serious note....I always "did it " wrong(I mean I heard him say not to use teeth more than once (where's an embarrassing icon when you need one?) then I always felt inadequate) so I guess he wanted that more often when we were together and I just never knew.<P>Well now I blow the little suckers head off!!!! Funny how now I don't need a lesson, just "practice makes perfect" I guess.<P>Now K and Lynton and Floored and the rest of you guys.....no comments needed or wanted. !!!!!!<P><BR>Hey Flowerseed I'm keeping the new ones home tonight. We're getting take out and gonna have a few beers and watch a movie later. Fatal Attraction is on WGN at 8 and we're gonna watch it again. Hmmmmmmm great title huh? <P> Debi (and the grown-up girls)<P><BR>------------------<BR>Imagine....<p>[This message has been edited by gemini1 (edited March 02, 2001).]

Oh gem you always make me laugh. I swear your my friend Roxie I used to work with. I guess if thats what you want to call it we used to laugh so hard at each other everyone thought we were on drugs. We ended up getting split up because we always had to much fun some of the little twits couldnt handle it.Speaking of dentel work I used to have a space between my front teeth when a filling fell out. Now let me tell I could make my h scream alright ouch! I dont really think he thought it was so important then. he he he with love flowerseed<p>[This message has been edited by flowerseed (edited March 02, 2001).]

Wow. See what happens when you wait until 2:30 in the afternoon to log on? As the maid in "Guess who's Coming To Dinner" said to Spencer Tracy, "All hell done broke loose now."<P>As I breath a sigh of relief that cd and Heavenly have worked out their differences on their own and Gem's wonderful statement about "broken homes" hit home, we have our home here together...we are a real family here. <P>From time to time we will have our differences, make up and in some cases, end up being close and better friends, like I suspect is happening between cd and Heavenly.<P>The only thing I would like to caution us on is being very careful not to censure each other and chastise each other for what we say. This will cause us to be too careful about what we say and we will end up withholding information or statements because we will be afraid of someone's reaction. No one here should feel as though they must walk on eggshells.<P>Personally, I am impressed with cd's big brain. I know she has mentioned her impressive IQ on two occasions, but I don't have a problem with that nor am I threatened by her intellect. In fact, I applaud it. I have never had any particular heartburn over anything she has said, because I feel she is entitled to say anything she pleases here.<P>I am not jealous of cd, because I am smart, too. I am not Mensa material but trust me, you would all want me for your Trivial Pursuit partner. My head is filled with an overabundance of useless information.<P>Heavenly is our resident legal beagle with the big degrees and a law practice. She and cd are pretty much intellectual equals and sometimes when people are a lot alike, there can be some friction. Once the controntation has taken place, it clears the way for a new friendship to evolve. I sincerely hope that is what is happening here.<P>I think we should all post three extraordinary things about ourselves...I know "two" of Gem's...hahahaha...but, just to take the edge off and to remind ourselves of the special things that make us unique and special.<P>I don't know if this was "Much Ado About Nothing" or a rendition of "Snow White" (mirror, mirror on the wall...) all I know is that I have come to love all of you as family and anything you want to say, regardless whether or not anyone likes it or approves of it or not, should not keep anyone away, because you would all be sorely missed. I think it is imperative none of us are restricted from saying what is in our hearts, even if we need to brag a little (I'm 51 but people think I am in my mid or late 30's) to make us feel good about ourselves after all we have been through, then brag away...<P>Now that we are all playing nice again, let's stick together and make "acceptance" of our quirks and idiosynchracies, policy.<P>Catnip =^^=<P>

Flowerseed YOU make me laugh! I had a friend at work like that and in the summer we went to lunch. She commented on being so hot and sweaty....like a whore in church.....o lord did I ever laugh! <P>Now a question for Catnip....<P>Are we a dysfunctional family? ;0<P>See you guys later.<P>Oh, Heavenly....I only WISH I was a lawyer or anything other than "hairdresser"....<P>You are one cool Lady.<P>Now cd I hope you're all right too.<P>Glad things worked out for the best.<P> Debi<P>------------------<BR>Imagine....

Thanks Catnip for setting me straight. But, I guess we are not free to say anything that we want. CD asked a question and I answered it from my heart. Yet, I have the feeling that now I am the "bad" person for saying that something was bothering me. I thought I was supposed to say when something was bothering me?<P>I feel awful that CD became so upset and I have told her so privately. I hope that she will forgive me if I hurt her feelings in any way. I always assume that when people ask a question, they want an answer. I guess I was wrong and believe me I will not do it again.<P>I guess the whole bragging bit pushed my buttons because people tend to judge other people by artificial standards - like money and college degrees. I felt uncomfortable with those kinds of standards being injected into what was always an anonymous forum. I never cared what kind of jobs people have here or how much money or how many degrees.<P>I understand that CD did not mean it the way that I took it, but my misunderstanding of her intentions was about to drive me from the forum and I thought it was better to get it out in the open.<P>Flowerseed, you have always tried to smooth things over when times got rough and I have sincere appreciation for all that you have done for me while I have been here.<P>Gemini, hairdresser or brain surgeon, you are one wonderful lady and I am so happy that you have transformed right before our eyes into a confident woman who is finding out what she wants for herself.<P>I wish you all the best. I will keep you in my prayers always and I hope that one day each of us will find the happiness we deserve. Love to you all and goodbye.<P>- Heavenly

In my last email to heavenly, I promised her that I would tell a joke if we could both come back here as friends and go on with things as usual. Here's one at our expense, heavenly:<P>An old farmer took his first cross country flight in an airplane to visit his new great-grandson. He was seated next to a young man with a laptop computer. After the plane took off, the young man said to him, "Hey Pops. Want to play a game to pass the time?" <BR> <BR>The old farmer, a man of few words, just shook his head.<P>"C'mon, old timer. Let's do play a game of trivia. I'm a certifiable genius. I'm always hearing from old folks like you that you get smarter with age. So why don't you prove it to me? We'll make a little bet. I'll even give you 50 to 1 odds."<BR> <BR>The old farmer reluctantly agreed.<P>"What we'll do," the young scholar said, "is this. I'll ask you a question. If you can't answer it, you have to give me one dollar. Then you ask me a question. If I can't answer your question, I'll give you 50 dollars."<P>The old man nodded his consent.<P>"OK," said the young man, "What is the distance between the earth and the moon?"<P>The old man didn't say a word, but just reached into the pocket of his overalls and gave the young man a dollar.<P>"All right, old feller, your turn," said the young man.<P>The old farmer thought for a minute, then asked, "What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down the hill with four legs."<P>The young man thought for a few minutes. He looked through several reference books. he got on his laptop computer and e-mailed all the members of his Mensa group. All to no avail. Finally, he hands the old man a fifty dollar bill. "OK, old timer," the young man says, "you win. But tell me, what DOES go up a hill with three legs and comes down the hill with four legs?"<P>The old man didn't say a word, but just reached into the pocket of his overalls and gave the young man a dollar.<BR>____________________________<P>That's the best I can do on short notice. <P>I never said it would be a GOOD joke.<P>What do you say, heavenly. Bygones?<BR>With love,<BR>cd

Who am I to set anyone straight? I am a mess and never will be a runner up for Miss Mental Health.<P>We are all so fragile here! It seems like when feelings get hurt, the threats to leave the site begin. And that is such a shame because we need this site and each other.<P>Lord knows my ego has taken a beating over the past three years and frankly, I am insecure and unsure of myself and filled with self-hate at times. Sometimes I need to brag a little to make myself feel better about myself. My anonymity protects me and allows me to talk about myself, if I feel the need. <P>I need validation at times. I look forward to the day when I will feel like I used to and no longer need the approval of others.<P>We have learned a lot about each other on this site over the past few months even though we are anonymous and have never met. It is up to each of us to determine whether or not we feel safe to identify ourselves. Or not.<P>If we don't like a fellow members' particular style or slant, we can take what we like about what they have said and leave the rest. Sometimes things that someone says bug me, too, but I realize it is just the way they are and their way is not my way. I have learned though, that we are all in a lot of pain and if I dismiss this annoying thing that someone does and focus on the message behind it, I realize it is just their coping mechanism and makes them a lot easier to accept. Pretty soon, the thing about them that pissed me off to begin with was just something in me that was my problem anyway. I also notice that the things that bother me most about others is what I perceive in myself.<P>We are all free to say whatever we wish. With that comes responsibility for hurting someone's feelings unnecessarily. Sometimes it aint' a big enough deal to make someone feel bad and I feel we should look out for each other's feelings and if we must take someone to task perhaps we should do it privately if it is something that one cannot let go of.<P>I think this OW crashing our site put something unhealthy in motion that I feel terribly, terribly responsible for getting involved with it. I owe eveyone here a huge apology because I feel like I started the ball rolling by ignoring K's advice.<P>If anyone thinks I should leave, well, too bad, I ain't going! Love me or hate me, makes no difference to me. I am a completely flawed person with lots of problems to work out so I can't leave til I figure it all out.<P>Catnip =^^=<P>

CD & Heavenly,<P>I too am glad everything has ironed out. I know CD more from her responses to my posts, but from reading other posts of Heavenly I can see you have a good heart as well.<P>I think this board is blessed with an abundance of women who feel their emotions deeper than most. I am guilty of this as well. My husband always gripes about how I take everything to heart and don't let stuff roll off of my back. I think when we think with our hearts too much we let the minor stuff affect us in a major way.<P>I'm glad we can all agree to be similar but different in our own individual ways. God gave us our individuality and we should be grateful.<P>SO CAN WE ALL GROUP HUG NOW??? <P>------------------<BR>Zebra Baby ...<P>Lord, give me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

CD<BR>I have read all the preceeding, and as usual all the ladies have done a super job (along with all the other "jobs" they have done), to state the case, DON'T GO!<BR> We are all a diverse group with one thing in common, our spouses made bad choices that have hurt us horrendously. However everyone here has come here for support and even though they are hurting have been able to offer help and support to others in like pain. Isn't that a wonderful thing? I think so. What about you?<BR> So, I want to throw in my 2 cents and ask you to stay, please.<BR> I thank you all for bringing humor here. I am not a humorless person, but when I come here and fail to bring it with me. I will try for more levity, but time is always limited and I want to help.<BR> Well, have to go - good luck and hugs to all of you.<BR> I am, TG