glad to see your humor NG--mine has disappeared--don't do the SF thing--I did it yesterday afternoon and then all heck broke loose--I think I'm done--I don't have any fight left.

Here's the update:

Update

Kimmy I am just so sorry for all you are going though AGAIN! Man I just don't get these men that have everything in the palm of their hands and just let it slip though. I would have called the ow too. You did good you where calm, and didn't get into it w/ her. Makes me wonder if things are good between h & I and the first time she gets a date or a bf this will just keep happening. I did ask H about someone else being w/ his child and he said now who would want a woman w/ two kids and not M and all w/ different last names? So is H going to freak when this comes around on my side? I think we lead people to believe that this situation is just a "event" but in a since when you have C it becomes your life? It becomes one chapter after another. OK nuf that crap. But I feel for you Kim and like so many other situations here, we can't tell you what is right or wrong for you to do. You are the only one who knows what is right for you ! But we are here for you. HUGS & Prayers sent to you.
<img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" /> Sunny D

Kimmy,

i agree with Sunny. We can not tell you what to do; we can only lend an ear and offer our support. You did do a good job of not LB. I know that Nio is really confused at what will happen next. I think you will know what is right for you and your family. Just remain calm and see what comes out of the oven.

I am one to talk, but i know how you feel.
Keep praying,

JT

Kimmy,

I like your guts. You are doing good. You know I have confronted husband with cell phone bill three months in a row now. This last month he did not call her much at the end of the month right when you would think he would be calling more since the baby is about to be born. I feel for you, that is cruel, him sleeping on the edge of the bed. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Mad]" src="images/icons/mad.gif" /> <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />

So proud of you for not LBing. I don't think I could have been a cool cucumber like you were--big score for you on that!

Not LBing helps alot--seems like we shouldn't have to when it is something like this but LBing just makes them dislike us or hate us and gives them more reason to leave and think we are the bad person.

IMO my H is not in love with me because the whole love bank thing and as you know you don't want to be around people who makes us unhappy and because we have empty loves banks--his more so than mine he totally dislikes me. However, unless he learns something about wah tis happening it will happen again with him and a different person--he will not love them after a while either.

I will tell you to hang tough and only you know what you can do but I found it really great to go back yesterday and re-read Dr. H's Basic Concepts and I think that my H is even goign to read them.

What a shame that you and Nio are having to go through this but it sounds necessary because he hadn't gone through all this before--like the EA hadn't completely ended for him--just thinking that it may be a necessary eveil so to speak.

Have a great day Kimmy--love ya and thinking of you and Nio--waiting for to pull his head oput again and once and for all.

Kimmy,

You & your family are in my prayers. God will show you what to do & he will work this out for you in HIS time.

You are doing such a great job handling H, I don't think I could.

I know I say this to you all the time, but I'll say it again YOU are one REMARKABLE woman, God will reward you for your faithfulness.

Hugs to you! {{{{{{{{{{{{{Kimmy}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Kimmy,
Just read you update, I give you a ton of credit you are doing great. I have no idea how you are doing it, I would have lost if when I saw the phone bill.

I really don't have much advice but I think you are doing fine and I will pray for you my dear. You are to good to loose and he needs to know that.

Update

Here it is. Thank you to all for your prayers and support. I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have you all!

Nio, read your most recent update. I am praying for you girl. I hope he wakes up soon. You are one strong lady, even if you are a size 6. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

Hey just got to read the update,

Sorry that NIO is being such a [censored]. He should know by now how much you love him. Why can't they let these women go. You can not have it all and one decision is all you have to make. It is best for everyone. I hope his fog lifts sooner than later, I hope you are still around if it takes longer. You are a strong woman, I don't think I could listen to him tell me that he was going up there with her. You can not stop him of course, but to have them both tell you that. When she told you he hadn't even discussed it right! So I wonder if he would have told you the truth about it or just said he had some business or something. If you hadn't found the cell bill you might not have gotten it out of her either.

I don't know just questioning the behavior. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" /> Keep praying Kimmy, that's really all you can do. He'll have to find his way on his own. <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />

I am praying for your M, more than you know because you have been so selfless in this whole mess, and I want it to worjk out for you. I don't think I could have even attempted what you've accomplished. So remain strong and keep the Faith.


JT

Kimmy,

I just read your complete update, I had no idea that Nio was so torn & conflicted & tearing you apart in the process. I cried when I read your update & I am crying now, you don't deserve this, none of us do, but YOU especially with all that you endured & accepted to keep your M.

I pray that God will touch Nios's heart & mind & help him see that his place is with you, giving you & all his children all the love & honor you all deserve.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> Why does it have to hurt so bad? Why can't I forget my vows to God and to him and just bail? Isn't that what he's trying to do? </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Sweetie I wish I knew & I am right where you are feeling the same way, I know I shouldn't but I question God as to why he keeps love alive in our hearts for these men who hurt us so deeply, why can't we just let it go????

Keep praying & trust God. He is able & still in control.

Love you!
{{{{{{{{{{{kimmy}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Kimmy,

I read your update but I think you are handling things great. At least you did get the truth out of Nio. I cannot seem to get my darling husband to be honest with me. I am sad for what you are going through. To have a man admit that does hurts you so much. You want to feel that you are special to him.

Kimmy (((((Hugs darlin))))) Maybe god will touch his heart and this will be the I'm over you for good trip (meaning VD) He is getting splinters coming off that fence and just pray that this will be the end of the emotional attachment to her. No letter will ever replace hearing it in person! He is thinking about you, you can count on it. I will say a prayer everytime I look at the clock and God may work some good stuff for you this weekend! He may have to do this for HIM to help ya'll. Ok I'm obtamistic (sp) But I know God can work wonders and don't give up your sanity or your hope that your M will work. Just pray all you can this weekend while he is gone and give it to God to touch him. How ever hard that maybe to do! We are w/ you.
<img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" /> Sunny D

I pray that Nio sees the final light soon--thought he had but this is a process and apparently he hasn't but I think you are doing great so hang in there--MEN--all I can do is throw my hands up in the air.

I'm so glad you are not Lbing to speak of and that you still have faith.

OK kimmy where are you? And how are you doing? Let us know. I hope it went well.
<img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" /> Sunny D

hmmm, I sent kimmy an email this morning and she hasn't emailed me back! It is pouring here and she has to drive into town for work! I will call her to make sure all is ok!

thanks momto3boys--said prayer for all of us here last night.

She is ok! She said she will update as soon as she gets into work!

I'm here. It was sunny in Rockport...WTF??? Mt3B, didja order this fricking rain? It was like driving into doom and gloom here.

Going to update thread now.