I am one currently in recovery with my h, but I don't mind a thread on life after divorce at all. Why would any of us?<P>It is very true, we should all have a PHD in marriage building after all the time we've spent here. And it has been in my mind too, whether we save our marriage or not, we win big here. We are learning so many things that are far more valuable than the things we learned in school.<P>I'm glad to see the posts of many "old posters" I haven't seen in a while, and even more glad that y'all are doing well.

Thank Heavens! I was beginning to worry! <P>I'm glad you are getting out and about!<P>Well, it's still a little soon for me to consider <I>dating</I>, but I would really like to have a nice single man to do stuff with again.... I miss going dancing with a regular partner (XH quit wanting to go shortly after we got married), and all my "guy" friends who used to go with me are either married now, or live too far away. And I really don't feel like going into a bar alone just yet. I'd just like a loyal companion, without the responsibility of a dog. <P>Don't get me wrong.... it's not that I would turn down a date, but I don't want to rebound with a really nice guy and screw things up.<P>Thoughts & Prayers,<BR>Overly Cautious Butterfly<P>------------------<BR>There are deep sorrows and killing cares in life, but the encouragement and love of friends were given us to make all difficulties bearable. <BR>-- John Oliver Holmes<P>The opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference.<BR>-- Elie Wiesel<P><BR>

Desiree, <BR>I just had to respond after reading your post...<BR>There is a feeling that once the decision to divorce has been made, a sense of, well, not sure of the word, but of peace, closure, ???<BR>I know I felt it, after waiting in limbo for so long. You will still go through some tough times. I still see my X almost every day (we work together), so when i am not expecting it,something will happen. The OW will call, someone calls that does not realize we are divorced, etc. Just when I think I am fine, I realize that there is still a wound, healing, but still can have salt poured into it. <BR>But, the uncertainty of my life is over. I can build again. I can raise up from this a better person. Dating is tough. Seeing yourself with another person is tough. Maybe that is why I could never have had an affair. But, you know what? Now I can see myself with another. I can see myself, either on my own, or with another enjoying life, without the pain and gut wrenching feeling I have had in the past two years. <BR>No longer is my destiny controlled b someong who doesn't care about me. I control it. I am the person who will guide my life. It is so sad that my X didn't want to be part of it. But I will go on!!!<BR>Ok, off my soap box for today....Desiree, you have everything in life to go for. Live it to the fullest!!<BR><P>------------------<BR>Susan

Okay, so I was wrong ! I am glad that even though we are in this position, we can still come here and talk about it. Sometimes the D word is a dirty word here.<P>Cheers!<BR>Eric

OH BOB,<P>Ummmm, what's that supposed to mean?

Bob,<P>Sorry for using your thread here...<P>Sue,<P>Thanks so much for the words of encouragement. I will post a thread with the details soon.<P>Desiree<P>------------------<BR>"Life is made up, not of great sacrifices or duties, but of little things in which smiles and kindnesses and small obligations, given habitually, are what win and preserve the heart and secure comfort."<P>Sir Humphry Davy<BR>