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Joined: Dec 1969
Posts: 6,937
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Joined: Dec 1969
Posts: 6,937 |
Cat:<P>I'll remind you of two marriagebuilders rules:<P>1. The POJA. If you both don't enthusiastically agree to a course of action, then you don't do it.<P>I'd say that neither of you should be at the party. Boo hoo...<P>2. Withdrawal is often set right back to t=0 when in contact with the OP. Harley recommends such extreme measures as moving away to help insure that setbacks don't happen.<P>You're risking this stuff for a party??? Please...
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Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 261
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Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 261 |
trying--I never said anyone was jumping me, I *stated* how this whole conversation between Allen and I, and the this resulting thread got started. I replied honestly to a question he asked.<P>Perhaps my "responses" seem cold because of the way it is being presented by Allen? I assure you there are lengthy discussion for every little "blurb" he posts. Which is why I posted what I did, just to clarify my side.<P><BR>And K, we do both agree that we want to go to the party.<P> I know, we certaintly won't be poster children for the perfect MB couple will we ![[Linked Image from marriagebuilders.com]](http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/images/icons/smile.gif) <P><p>[This message has been edited by Caterpillar (edited April 13, 2000).]
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Joined: Feb 2000
Posts: 660
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Joined: Feb 2000
Posts: 660 |
Allen,<P>I have no advice but just wanted to let you know I am still here and you and Cat both are in my prayers. Dana<BR>
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Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 552
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Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 552 |
Ok, questions ...<P>If I am reading things right Cat you think conversation between OM and you will be inconsequential smalltalk at a table with the party. Stuff Allen could certainly hear, and other than the fact that you'd be talking to a man you have strong feelings for wouldn't normally bother him. Is that right? You have no intention of getting involved in an intimate conversation that would lead to intimate dancing that would exclude Allen?<P>Sparkydog,<BR>I know the ultimate goal is no contact what so ever, but would the impact be lessened for you if whatever contact they did have you were around for?<P>Cat, <P>Are there things you are willing to do to limit if not eliminate contact?<P><BR>
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Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 552
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Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 552 |
Food for thought...<BR> <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi5055_qa.html" TARGET=_blank>http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi5055_qa.html</A>
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Joined: Dec 1999
Posts: 232
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OP
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Joined: Dec 1999
Posts: 232 |
I just wanted to take a second to thank everyone again for their thoughts, prayers, advice, concerns, etc.<P>We are still going, basically under the guise that whatever happens tonight is certainly no worse than has happened before and I'm surviving that just fine.<P>Three things will happen tonight:<BR>1. I will raise a glass and toast a very good friend of ours, wish him good luck and tell him goodbye in style. <P>2. I will have fun and not let others determine my happiness.<P>3. I will do everything in my power to get Cat and I home safely and soundly.<P>Again, thanks to everyone and wish us good luck. ![[Linked Image from marriagebuilders.com]](http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/images/icons/cool.gif) <P><P>------------------<BR>Allen<BR>sparky_dog_mb@yahoo.com
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Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 14,283
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Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 14,283 |
Sparky:<P>Sounds like a wonderful plan!!!<P>Will be thinking of you both...<P>Kathi
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Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 17
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 17 |
CAT & SPARKY<P>so what happened? I am in a similiar situation. (visit my thread)<P>My husband won't agree to no contact, so I understand Sparky's fears.<P>Yet, my husband wishes to keep his contact simple and overt, accusing me of never being able to trust him again, so I understand Cat's argument.<P>Plan A, Plan A, Plan A, it's only been a couple of weeks for me officially, but I'm getting sick of it.<P>LOL, I'm praying for you, because I'm there.<BR>Which icon means I have tears in my eyes?
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