Popeye:<P>Because of who you are and the way you look at things, I know you are going to be better than alright. In fact, you're already doing very well. I must admit, I am relieved. It's been quite a week for you.<P>I understand that you view your husband's debt not as monetary, but one of a moral debt. The problem I see is if the person is morally bankrupt to begin with, any moral debt owed may not be satisfied. <P>I am sure you are aware of this and are fully prepared to close this final chapter anyway.<P>Catnip =^^=

Originally when EM and I were negotiating the terms of our settlement, I wanted to keep the house and everything in it (to heck with what he wanted) Well, here in the state of CA, EVERYTHING is community property, so 50-50 is how it is split. That meant 1/2 of that lovely credit card debt I charged up ($32,000) was mine! And I didn't want to work either! What an eye opener it was to know I was now going to have to be financially responsible to pay off 1/2 of the damage I caused to the marriage. Which meant of couse, I had to get a job. I wanted EM to refinance the house and with the equity we had built up pay off all the debt, but as he pointed out to me, that would mean we no longer would have an "asset" in equity, but a new 30 year mortgage debt (and he would have to now pay 100% of the debt of the credit cards) So, he didn't bite. The judge cannot force you to refinance a house, but he can order the house to be sold. <P>Oh well, we ended up spliting everything 50/50 as required by this state, and he kept the house after buying my half out. (where was I going to get the money to do that?)<P>I agree, marriage is all about love, but divorce is definately all about money!