My H has email like yahoo/excite/hotmail, how can I get his password? Has anyone discovered how to do this? I cant ask, he has already changed his password twice because of suspicion. Any suggestions?<P>CF

Hey...finally a topic I know something about!!!<BR>I'm a systems consultant - I may be lost in life...but computers I can help you with.<BR>How computer literate are you?<BR>There are ways to get into the computer's 'brain' so to speak through the dos operating system to get a list of all passwords used, but if operating in dos mode is too much for you there is a super easy way that will also give you a record of all web pages/sites visited...chat room logs...and keystrokes (so you can read passwords). It will even record e-mail messages so you can see for yourself what is being said.<BR>There is a site called iopus.com that has 'spy software' that you can download onto your system. It installs and runs invisibly so the person your watching doesn't even know it's there (provided you use a regestered version and not a trial). It will give you a log and copies of all the things I've mentioned above. If you have access to another computer on the web, it will secretly e-mail you with the reports so you don't even have to check on your husbands system. <BR>It has 3 different types of programs available depending on your needs.<BR>Check it out!<BR>I hope that helps...and good luck.

I just remembered one other thing...<BR>Whenever a person is on the web the websites they visit leave a 'cookie' on the system. (provided that feature is enabled on your system...but to use Yahoo, excite etc. they must be if you want your id to be recognized automatically)<BR>You can find these in the windows folder on the c drive of your computer...it's a folder called cookies.<BR>Check through the cookie file...find the ones that belong to the e-mail accounts and display them using the windows wordpad program. Most of the language displayed will be jibberish, but keep reading...every few lines you will see words that make sense. Sometimes the passwords used will be displayed there if you can find the right cookie log...and if the user doesn't delete them manually.<BR>You could give that a try as well.

Thanks for the info, the only problem is, that I forgot to mention is that my H's computer is at work, we dont have a computer at home (probably a good thing) So, I had been able to check his yahoo/excite/hotmail address from work too, just by knowing his password in which I have guessed twice- but I have not been so lucky in guessing it a third time! Damn! I noticed he had changed it yesterday when I tried to log into it. I have gone to look at iopus, but its more for a computer at home, there is no way for me to go to his work and install that program- IMPOSSIBLE! I may just be SOL this time. I have seen one suspicious email before, and I want to keep monitoring. ANy more suggestions?<P>CF

Yikes! <BR>That's a tough one. No chance of access to his work system hmm?<BR>How about asking him to meet you at work for lunch or something? You could make an excuse for having to leave him alone in your office for a bit. Tell him that your going to be a few minutes, and why doesn't he check his e-mail while your gone so he doesn't get bored waiting?<BR>Have the iopus software installed before you do, and you can get his password that way. Or, if you can't put a program on your work system, check the cookie file...you might get lucky.<BR>The only other thing I can think of is using the pc anywhere program that comes as a component of the microsoft office package. Most offices use that one nowadays.<BR>This program allows you to dial in to any other system on the internet...all you need is the i.p. address of the system you want to connect to. If you can get that address off his work computer, you can dial into it from your own system at work and check the cookie files that way.<BR>What does he do for a living?<BR>Any chance of visiting his office after hours with the excuse that he forgot a file, and your there to pick it up for him?<BR>Then you could download iopus and set it up to e-mail you at work. The installation takes 10 minutes or less...any chance?

Easy one!<P>go to <A HREF="http://www.spectorsoft.com" TARGET=_blank>www.spectorsoft.com</A> order the reasonable software<BR>for about $40-60 it captures screen prints as short of time as 1 sec to 60 secs, and for days ..... I used it to catch my son at some XXX sites. <BR>I did't find out about this software until after D-day for us. My W was PC illiterate and I had set her up a Hotmail account months before the Emotional affair started. She had forgot that I knew the password. One day I checked and just about fell out of my chair. The pain! We are all better now,<BR>D-day was 9/9/99. HGBrawner help me alot! <BR>Get Spectorsoft its great software, it runs totally in the<BR>background, CANNOT be detected in stealth mode! password <BR>controled etc....let me know if you use it. <P>------------------<BR>jnvc

All very good suggestions, but still IMPOSSIBLE, the only way is for us to get a computer at home. Cant go to his work, there is security, etc. So how did you confront your W with the evidence you had? Well, I'm not very pc literate either, I would have difficulty I'm sure. Besides, on that iopus password recovery, the password has to be saved in the password field to be able to decode the ******. In these programs like excite/hotmail, it doesnt save, it has to be entered each time. Anyway, I will just have to do some snooping and hope he has written it down somewhere. But I will keep all of your suggestions in mind. Thanks<P>CF

can't forget- im sorry im not up on your story, but i want to tell you something. If you already know he has/had an affair, then DON"T snoop. i know how tempting it is, but it only rubs salt in your wounds. ive been going throught this for 3 years, and have snooped constantly, and always regretted it. it causes massive LB'ing and has really set our recovery back. do as i say, not as i do.<P>as for iopus, i downloaded it last night on my own computer, and it is AWESOME. it saved every single thing i typed...passwords and instant messenger chat...and mailed it to my webmail. very cool indeed. <P>just remind me NOT TO SNOOP when i get home to H's house next month!!!!!<P>hugs,<BR>julie

Hmmm, strange that you say not to snoop, but you have iopus installed. okay, I would install it if I had a pc at home, but I dont. Im out of luck. Anyway, not sure my H had an affair, but would like to know the truth.<P>CF

oh, i installed iopus just to check it out it's on my own computer-- but i'd have to pay $50 and risk H's finding out...and he is a computer guy!--just to find the gory details of what i know anyway.<P>well, anyway, if you aren't sure about your H, snoop away, but just know what you find could be UGLY (some of H's and ow's little "love notes" feel like they are permanently burned in my brain. blech).<P>good luck,<BR>julie

I hadnt found anything during the time I was snooping, only one note from someone he works with ( the friend of the OW) So, when I saw that, made me want to keep monitoring. I am out of luck now, not knowing his password. He reassures me that he is not doing anything i would disapprove of. Hopefully I can trust him. The only way I would be able to snoop is to run out and buy a computer and then install that program and have him check his email. But what if I did see something, and confront him with it? I would be busted for not trusting him. Kind of a no-win situation.<P>CF

SoDuped and JNVC,<P>I, too, would like to snoop. My H's computer is at work, also. I have a PC at home and he doesn't use it much. He had a hotmail account that I broke into right when I knew just a little about his EA. He said that his computer at work told him when someone else accessed his e-mails. I have his e-mail address at work now (not hotmail-he says he no longer uses it since he has it through work). Is it possible to use the software you were talking about in my situation. I understand all about LB, but I still don't believe he only had an EA and I do want to know. I feel that I have the right to know. Thanks in advance for any help you may offer.<P>Window

window, not sure what you are asking? My H has email at work too, but impossible to access, even with a password unless you set up that POP someone mentioned to me before. you'll have to go back and look at my old threads in IN RECOVERY under " I guessed my husbands email password" maybe you'll find something helpful. Right now, I am dealing with my own dilemma.<P>CF

Could this thread add anything?<BR> <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum31/HTML/002759.html" TARGET=_blank>http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum31/HTML/002759.html</A> <BR>

For all those lucky ones out there,<BR>I just like to tell you that if you are thinking about snooping around to find out if your another half have a A, do as you wish but the most important thing is work on yourself right way. <BR>Whether they have a A or not, you still have a chance to work it out since they are not telling you. My H have a A and when he told me about it(one and half month ago),it's already too late to save it( althopugh I am trying Plan-A). Once he lets the true out, he is made up his mind for a D. I wish I were one of you try to find the truth in stead of being giving the truth and having no choice. <BR>I installed the iopus two days ago, it works pretty good. Just try to find something to do. I do not think it will help my situaion. Wish you good luck and keep a eye on my update. Thank you.

I am trying to set up on yahoo my H's work email through POP- It asks for the mail account server, mail account username and password ( which I will have to figure out) Has anyone done this before, does it work, lets say my H' email address is smithb@gimsltd.com (example) what is the mail account server and username? I'm not very computer literate and just want to make sure I do it correctly. Thanks for any help!<P>CF

Guess what Cant'forget I sat in front of the computer asked the Lord to tell me the password since I was tired and weary from the internet bs I had put up with for 7 years and a word popped into my head and it was the password! what I saw made me sick and I printed out 50 very damaging emails,,, I said nothing went to a lawyer gave him 1800 dollars and filed.... I had to wait almost 10 days for him to get the paperwork at work and during this time I had to come home and pretend all was well... I must have had a sad look on my face because he changed his password one day and I again asked the Lord to tell me the password if I needed to keep looking and the word popped into my head I typed it in and kept printing and giving the work to my lawyer..... so guess the moral to this story is,,, you dont need a program... when the Lord thinks it is time for you to know,,, he will answer your questions...<BR>by the way ,,, H is home and we are doing fine... I just hated that I had to waste that money which showed the amount of my hurt and betrayal and now I have to pay another 1400 to go to Minneapolis... I do think this will be more worth it

can't forget,<P>I will try to answer your questions on POP3. I assume you now have his password.<P>"lets say my H' email address is smithb@gimsltd.com what is the mail account server and username?"<P>The mail account server is probably one of the following (try each): mail@gimsltd.com OR mailbox@gimsltd.com OR pop@gimsltd.com. The username is smithb.<P>If you continue to get wrong password or username errors after you have tried all the possibilities, then your H's workplace probably has a firewall in place.<P>Good luck.

Thanks for the quick responses! I will try the POP again. Actually, I dont have his work password, cant ask him either, because if this pop does work, he will see that his email has been checked-correct? I am just going to try and guess his password. I guessed it twice on his other email account, but he has changed it again and I havent figured it out. I found a website where you can pay someone to get it to you. Seems real ligit, has anyone tried this? I am probably not right about him having an A, since he has given me no other reason to be suspicious, probably just my insecurities. concerned1- so you got back with your H after all those emails? is that correct? Cant believe that! What were you thinking??? I dont know what those emails were about but sounds as if they were very disturbing. Well, I will try that pop again. In the meantime, I am still trying to guess his other email password. I have thought of everything he would possibly use, but nothing. He probably picked some letter/number combo. Oh well<P>CF

cant forget,<P>maybe i am wrong, but i always figured that if i didnt have anything to hide why would i care if my wife had my password. i willing give all my passwords to my wife, and would welcome her looking at what ever she chooses.<P>ask him for the password directly whats he going to say?<P>if he gives it to you immediatly you dont need to look if he say's i need to think about it or gets wierd then theres work to do!<P>believe me its not the specifics that matter, its that he is or is not being honest that does. so find out if he's being honest you know by looking at him if he's lying so just go do it. if you cant tell, be honest with him, tell him that your concerned that he isnt being honest and would he take you to his office and show you whats up? if he freaks out you have an idea now dont you .<P>just get what you need to act accordingly, the details will just serve as punishment.<P>good luck<P><BR>