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#909608 05/10/01 12:02 AM
Joined: May 2001
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Oh, Terri. Oh dear. Oh, oh, oh!<P>I have only now read your post and I swear you described my situation to a tee. <P>Don't do it.<BR>Don't do it.<BR>Don't do it.<P>See the I'm the OW post.<P>On the other half of your subject, I also get the intense sexual need feelings half way through the month. My temperature actually rises. It's almost embarrassing because for two to four days I'm flushed, but according to my dr. for some women the extreme physical reaction to hormones is normal. Uncomfortable but normal.<P>Praying for you.

#909609 05/11/01 12:14 AM
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Terri, you said "I know that Dr. Harley disapproves of friendships between members of the opposite sex who are married to other people. I don't happen to agree with that one - partly because I have always been able to better relate to men than other women, and partly because some of my best friends are men."<P>And I had to smile. Just because you like to be friends with men doesn't mean that you should discount the danger of married people having OS friendships. Even as you stand in the middle of the danger.<P>I myself can be friendly to a man, but to be a real friend, like going hiking alone with or for lunches or drinks or spending an evening catching up...no way. Even when I think it is safe because I'm not attracted to them...it doesn't mean they aren't attracted to me, or that down the line their "soul" won't start making them seem really attractive to me. It's the danger zone, and unwise if I intend my marriage to flourish. Practically anybody can be nice for a couple hours, or at work...it's the wear and tear, and even relaxation of a household that can be a component of making marriage so difficult.<P>You got it right about what Lostva was saying, you don't know what is really going on in this guy's household...and I don't think it takes much to turn a crack into an abyss in someone's mind. <P>Anyway, I'm proud of you for backing away a bit, even if it is just because you feel lousy. I hope you feel better, and stay strong. (ACHHOOOOO--same dang thing here. I think I'm sneezing brain matter [Linked Image from marriagebuilders.com] ).

#909610 05/11/01 12:16 AM
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double post<p>[This message has been edited by Lor (Lor) (edited May 11, 2001).]

#909611 05/10/01 04:29 PM
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Thanks to you Orchid and to TRose ... I'll post more later, but wanted to acknowledge your support and caring!<P> [Linked Image from marriagebuilders.com]<P>------------------<BR>terri<BR><B>Courage</B><P>Whatever course you decide upon,<BR>there is always someone to tell you<BR>that you are wrong.<P>There are always difficulties arising<BR>which tempt you to believe that your <BR>critics are right.<P>To map out a course of action <BR>and follow it to an end <BR>requires courage.<P><I>Ralph Waldo Emerson</I>

#909612 05/11/01 05:25 AM
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Hi Teri,<P>You know, it seems to me that the title of your topic says it all. I am the BS but my husband's OW even told me that she would never befriend a married man again. It's just too easy to quickly go too far by becoming emotionally attached.<P>I myself deliberately didn't talk to any MAN about my problems even though there are a couple of men at work that I probably could have talked to during the worst of it, I DIDN'T. I take Dr. Harley's advice to heart, it's NOT worth it. <P>Just my 2 cents. <BR>-Brighterdays.

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