Winny,<P>Yep it is what you said. Just thought that hearing it said in more then one way might help. Sometimes we need that.<P>Z<P>------------------<BR>He loves not who does not show love.<BR>----William Shakespeare

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by zorweb:<BR><B>Winny,<P>Yep it is what you said. Just thought that hearing it said in more then one way might help. Sometimes we need that.<P>Z<P></B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Right on, Zor! I've seen this posted on other forums here and when I saw it, I was jumping up and down in my seat, saying, "Thank you, Zor!!" You are a sweetie to post it here for us all. (it made me feel as if my thoughts/ feelings were validated!)<P>Hugs and God bless,<BR>Winny<P>

What is it that makes them so dense? <BR>I have no idea dear freddy.....something in the air this week? <BR>I think the way I might cope is by drinking tonight! Cheers, my friend. (((hugs))) cl

cl,<P>Just dont drink with HumbleFish...it makes you stupid and crass!!<P> <P>Trueheart

Thanks to everybody for their replies. I've been reading, digesting, talking and trying to understand.<P>The issue that I've hit is that she won't talk about this topic. She gets annoyed, angry, and then starts to close right up on me. I've not been judgemental - in fact, I've been praising her - I've explained how the fact that she doesn't talk about this topic affects me, and I've told her that I'm just trying to understand her so that I can deal with it.<P>As much as she hates it, the little she has told me has meant that I'm slowly building a picture of my wife, one which I never had before. It's not complete but I'm begining to understand. What I do now and how this affects my plan A is what I'm working on.<P>However, I am getting bored myself and starting to feel emotionally drained. Plan A can be rewarding but it's real hard work :-)<P>Freddy<P>

Freddy,<BR>I guess we're all in the same boat here. This is too weird. I am really on the other end - my H has no desire. You've got to go back to the EN's. Have you two filled out the emotional needs questionnaires? You start meeting her needs. You really have to look at the total picture, what are all the things that are wrong, that need fixing, then the SF falls in place (hopefully).<P>The real last time my H and I made love was Feb 2000 - that's a long time, but not as long as some others here. I blew my chance with LBing last time (in May) when he was actually looking forward to it - might have been a break through. Now we're dealing with some physical problems (back problems). So until that gets taken care of - I just need to work on his needs.<P>BTW, have you seen the Marital Recovery Agreement?<P>aftershock