Everyone,<p> She was just here to get the kids. Man, was she beautiful. She smiled and gosh I haven't seen her like that for a long time. She looked absoultely beautiful. It was everything that I could do not to tell her she was beautiful, but she knows that she is always beautiful to me. I again wanted to just go and grab her in a big hug, but I told myself to settle down. <p> You know this just registered with me. During our phone conversation on Christmas Eve. After I told her about her and the OM making a life together she said that the OM didn't have anything to do with any of this. I mean she tried to tell me that all the time after work that they spent together in the parking lot at work listening to music and going over to his house like she did back in Jan of 01. I am sorry. She is either blind or just doesn't have the balls to say that she cheated. I am sorry for bring this up again but my heart just feels heavy today. <p> I forgot to add also in that conversation that I told her that we still had the pictures up in the house with her in them and we would have the same pictures up that were in our house pre seperation. She was absolutley silent. I don't know if it made her think or not. Thanks for listening.<p>Indy<p>[ January 01, 2002: Message edited by: INDY_357 ]</p>

Everyone,<p> It is really suprising to me that my WS has changed alittle bit. She is on time and even was early to get the kids over the last week. I can't explain it. Is she starting to miss her kids? I don't know, but I find it strange. I mean starting with the phone conversation is the first time we really talked in maybe 3 months. I have totally taken on Plan B. I just don't know what to say.<p> On another note. I checked on the automatic with holdment order for child support last week. It has been at her place of employment since the 30th of November without being returned. She claims to have no money then what does she do? She gets my daughter a new coat and my son a new pair of shoes. Here is a question for you. Do they buy things for the kids to make the kids think that they really love them or is it for them to try and feel better?<p>Indy

Back to the Top. Looking for Orchid. Are you out here?<p>Indy

Hi, <p>I'm here. [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Yes and no. Logic in the fog does not exist. I am proud of your plan B. You have a bit of a stubborn one here but just maybe, ya know??? <p>Keep up your plan until she is ready to show some action. That would include inconviencing herself to meet her obligations. I mean what does she do that is really a luxury that she should be applying to the childcare? Even getting hair and nails done weekly, etc. is a luxury at this point. <p>Be aware and careful. Pray for a calm heart and clear mind so that you can recognize good progress vs a false one. <p>Take care Indy, you are doing good. <p>L.

Orchid,<p> How are things in your neck of the woods? Did you get my last email? I am trying so hard, but seeing her just....... I don't know.<p>Indy

Orchid,<p> I am sorry that I didn't make it out of the house tonight. I just got the kids into bed. How was your day today? You sounded very busy today. How are things on the home front?<p> I am just trying to plug along day to day. i am trying so hard to give the kids everything that they had in our home pre seperation, but I find that difficult to do when their sister is not here. I still can't believe this is happening to me and our family. <p>Indy

Hi Indy,<p>Ok so I can't call? I did get your e-mail today and sent a long response.....another tall tale from the valley.... YUCK!!! PBR up to her antics again! [img]images/icons/mad.gif" border="0[/img] <p>I am doing ok, just a bit frustrated about getting phone calls at my home. I told H about filing those harrassment charges, I think he will but it has to be him since he is the one getting most of those calls. I get blessed with the house calls and seeing her H's name on my caller id box!! <p>It is pouring out here tonight. I have a pot of turkey soup ready to heat up. Guess it is going to be leftovers tonight!!! <p>I will check back later. <p>L.

Orchid,<p> I can understand about the phone calls. They just make yo crazy don't they. I find myself reliving the beginning of this thing. It is almost to much to bear. I catch myself saying that this time last year I was on my way home. I just remember the longing to return home. I have felt it for the last year. <p> I hope that everything at work settles down for you. How are the kids at your place? I hope that they are ok. I feel my children's pain. I just wish that I could make it go away. I know that I can't. My parents tell me the same thing. They wish that they could take my pain from me. I just feel really alone.<p> I talked to my lawyer today. We talked about the with holding order. He sent a letter to her place of employment to let them no that they needed to get that done and that it needed to be returned to the county. We also talked about the van and the fact that they plates for my van are on their's. I told him to get a letter ready for that and to inform her that I would be claiming the children on my taxs. I am wondering how she will react to that. She said that she didn't have the money to get it plated. I told my lawyer that I wanted those plates in my hand by the end of next week. This may just really make her mad. I just hope that it doesn't distroy any chance at anything.<p>Indy

Hey Indy,<p>Just wanted to say hi and let you know I was thinking about you and your kids. I am so sorry you are having such a difficult time. It is incredibly hard to understand isn't it?<p>Have you read the book "Rebuilding When Your Relationship Ends"? I know neither one of our relationships has officially ended yet...but I took this class just to get some support last fall. At the time, I think I was too hurt and still in shock about what had happened in my life. Now I am going through it again....and I can make more sense of it. If my relationship does eventually end, I will probably go through it again and get even more out of it. It describes the steps you need to go through to get emotional healing. I have been having a hard time with this whole situation...and it is hard for me to move forward...anyway, didn't know if you had seen it or not. Take Care...

MNM,<p> Thanks for thinking about me and the kids. I am sorry that I took me so long to get back to you. I know it is hard to understand. I just hope that some light comes soon.<p>Indy

Everyone,<p> I just wanted to let you know that I am still alive. My WW called twice on saturday. She left messages for the kids and told them that she loves them. The kids and I had a full day on saturday. I am coaching my son's basket ball team at school and I had to catch myself looking for my WW and SD in the stands. I hated that. It was everything that I could do to keep on task. We then went out to dinner with my family and to the mall. She hasn't called since and hasn't said anything about getting them. I just wanted to let you know I am still around.<p>Indy

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by INDY_357:
<strong> I had to catch myself looking for my WW and SD in the stands. I hated that. It was everything that I could do to keep on task. </strong><hr></blockquote><p>Hey, Indy, <p>Just checking in to see how you're doing...aaaand....you're doing fine....just hang in there with your Plan!<p>It's hard, I know. I know. But you're doing fine....keep up the good work!!<p>You can do this. Just come here and VENT anytime you need to.<p>Prayers for you.......coming at ya!!!

Orchid,<p> First I would like to say that I am sorry again for you and your friend. <p> My WW called today about getting the kids on saturday. Again she called me by my family name. I have to admitt that it is good to hear her saying it, but it also hurts. Does she do this for a reason? She said that she has to work for the rest of the week. If I have a problem with saturday that I need to call her there. My son has basketball pratice that day. How can I make this work? I don't want to have to converse with her again. It was too hard on Christmas Eve.<p>Indy

Hi Indy,<p>Why oh why?!??! Can't really say why the WS act they way they do. She gave you her work schedule for......? Ok, but you have plans and unless you need to call her then don't. Hard as it is. It appears she may be trying to feebly reach out to you. Maintain your position......she will need to come to her family. <p>As Redhat says, I am the one holding the record for letting the WS back home too early!!! Ok, I took that blow. I don't want you to have to make the same mistake nor would I want you to blow any chance you may have. So just keep playing it cool. [img]images/icons/cool.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Enjoy the game. I am stuck at work again.....will probably be here for several more hours..... YUCK! <p>Thanks for the support. I feel better now. <p>L.

Indy,<p>My name is called ... make me sneeze [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] . Hang in there brother. Play it cool. Take some dance lessons or something. The less contact you have the better at this point. Some WS can't let go BS !!!, they still make sure you are not moving on !!!. Hope she is not one of those.

Hey Indy,<p>Sounds like you are doing much better these days. I'm so proud of you. It's been a hard road and you have come a long way.<p>Orchid, Red Hat and the crew are giving you great advice as usual.

Z,<p> Thanks for the kind words. I haven't seen you lately. I really feel down and worthless today. I have just really had a bad couple of days and I just really want to go home to my family. <p>Indy

Indy,
I'm sorry you're down. Me too. Seems to be in the air lately. Hang in there, k? I'm around some this weekend. Send me an e-mail if you want... or we can talk some here. I'll be off and on. Why do you think you feel worthless and down?<p>Faith1

Hi Indy,<p>I'm here too!!! [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] Talk ok? We'll be here. <p>L.

Sorry to hear you're having a hard time. I find that the best thing to do on days like that is to just go through the motions. Don't expect much of yourself. And get to bed early. It will pass. Overall you seem to be doing well. So just keep doing it, one day at a time.<p>I've not been around as much because it's been crazy.. first xmas, then my LASIK eye surgery and now my mom is in the hospital. She's had several strokes in the last two weeks. Has been in the hospital all this week. I just don't know what is going to happen with her. She looks like she is going to make it physically, though she is very weak now. But she seems to be slipping in and out of it mentally. It's pretty scary to see. She's 80 so she's had a full life. It's hard to see her this way. Time will tell.