- You're crazy.
- Your mom is a lush.
- Baby killer (I had an abortion when I was 19).
- c***
- witch with a "B"
- stupid<p>But ya know what? I would rather him hit me than say all those things. He was very abusive.<p>But he's long gone and I'm better now and very happy!!! [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img]

Clearview,<p>I am sooo sorry. How can people (all of us) who are capable of deep love also be capable of being so callous and cruel? It amazes me.<p>The word I despise most in the English language is c***. It's just digusting.

Thank you. Yes I HATE that word. It makes me want to get sick.<p>But I'm over it. Thank goodness!!! [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img]

wow.... yep... it's all typical stuff, and I heard a lot of it too. Too painful to really give any time and mental energy to.<p>I really enjoyed reading the posts by Miss Priss and Topie... to HEAR that WS's can say these things, and STILL recover the marriage. Too many of us BELIEVE these cruel things, or assume the marriage is over just because these things are said.<p>This reminds me of the story about the difficult teenage boy who was assigned the task of nailing a bunch of nails into a fence, then told to remove them. After he completed the task, he inquired as to its purpose. His parents explained that words are like nails. You can try to take them back, but there will always be a hole left behind - a reminder of the nail that was there once before.<p>My H said many of the same things ya'll have posted. I guess the most recent - still fresh in my mind - was the expense of the divorce was a small price to pay to get me out of his life. [img]images/icons/frown.gif" border="0[/img]

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>
What words from your WS hurt you most?
[/QB]<hr></blockquote><p>Getting married was a mistake.<p>If I stay I will be miserable forever.<p>There is absolutely no chance we will ever get back together, so get any thoughts of that out of your mind.<p>I've been unhappy for a long time (3 months earlier he was gushing of his own free will to my BIL how he'd never been happier in his life and how great things were with us)<p>We can get a quick annulment and still be friends.

Oh Faith I'm sorry! Hugs to you {{{{{{{{{{Faith}}}}}}}}}<p>Clear

I think the cruelest thing my W has said was that the whole time she has been with me she never knew what love really was. In other words she never really loved me. <p> Sure there are many more. This is all your fault, Love you but not in love..., you are more like my father or brother, I hate you.<p> I guess the most recent, which was some months ago was when we were playing, or so I thought, and I accidently bumped heads with her. I know it hurt her because it hurt me. Well....never mind....it hurts too much to think...let alone write....but it was cruel.<p> jd

I almost forgot what he said to me when I told him I was pregnant. This was 4 days after he left me and this was a PLANNED pregnancy on both our parts. He was well aware that I might be pregnant when he left.<p>"I think you should have an abortion. If you won't then you can raise the baby alone. I'll support it financially but that's all. This is not good news. I don't want it. I'm not ready for that kind of responsibility."<p> I had recently had a miscarriage. When I found out I was pregnant that time he was THRILLED, couldn't wait to tell everyone. When we lost the baby it really freaked him out. I think that was the catalyst that set it all in motion (the depression, MLC, affair). Of course he changed his mind and became a super involved and devoted Dad. Him saying what he did about our unborn son is his painful cross to bear for the rest of his life and I know he still occasionally feels the giult. When I was pregnant with our second child he would barely let me lift a finger.

sorry, double post.<p>[ February 19, 2002: Message edited by: diddallas ]</p>

My xh's meanest thing was telling me I wasn't fit to speak the OW's name. And that sex with me was a mistake (yeah, for me, too--had to take a long shower for two seconds of activity). And his pet name for me was "She-devil".<p>I wanna throw up whenever I have to see or speak to him now.

So far I guess the cruelest thing my WW has said to me is when she sent an e-mail to OM that I intercepted but when I read it it read:<p>"Hey Mark (me), this one is for you! LOL"<p>Then they (WW and OM) had a big laugh about it in an IM the next day. The worst part was that I couldn't confront her on it becasue I didn't want to admit that I was snooping.

The first thing was "I don't think you're the one for me." That was long ago and we stayed together(probably shouldn't have).<p>More recent it's been things like :
"You're trifling"
"*****"
"You're evil"
and my all time favorite happened just weeks ago
during me giving him oral sex he turns over and when I ask him why he says "You're not doing it right" I assume that meant I didn't do it like her, because he never had a problem in all these years with my technique.<p>He is a charmer [img]images/icons/frown.gif" border="0[/img]

After contacting OW and letting her know she could have him and that I was through with the BS and of course poor dear OW got all upset, this is what I got from him:<p>"You're a F'ing monster. You will never understand what love really is and you never did. I f'ing hate you for making her(OW) cry and if you contact her again I will make it my life's work to destroy you and your f'ing family. I hate you and regret every minute of our time together. She is the most important person in the world to me and if you come near her I will hurt you, TRUST ME!!!!!"<p>Weeks after this he apologized and said he didn't mean it. The damage from that one time was enough to make me move on, from that time on my love for him died with a big loud thump.<p>I have this e-mail saved on my computer and whenever I feel like I miss him I look at it and remind myself of what a cruel and hateful person he is and how lucky I am to have escaped.<p> OW will not be able to handle the fallout when he explodes again and he will, bi-polar people always do.

After 16 years of M and 18 years together and 2 D, she told me that this M is a mistake ...<p>She wanted to trade in our kirby while I was scambling to pay the bill. She says in spanish to a kirby salesman that "I am a dirty person and all Asian are live in a dirt" ... She forgot that I could understand that much !!!. The saleman tried to pressure me by saying I should buy her one even w/o her asking. I told him that this is not the right time and I refuse to buy her one. On the way out I told the saleman that the old kirby I bought it for her a long time ago w/o her asking me. What I need is 3 servants to clean my place not a kirby.

My H found a letter from the OM in my briefcase in the middle of the night. When he woke me up with his startling discovery, my stupid mouth said, "Why are you snooping in my personal belongings!"<p>Then, I was even more delusional after laying in bed for 5 days after that. He was screaming at me with his face several inches from mine and said, "How could you do this!" My stupid response was, "Why the hell do you care! You've wanted me out of your life for so long. So why would you care if I found someone else!" Oh god, was I someone from outer space or something?

The most hurtful thing that my WH ever said to me was that he had never had feelings like this for any other person, including me. Even now, it still has the power to make me really depressed. So in those 15 years, he never once had those feelings for me that he had for her. <p>Another thing was that he thought I was with him just for his money (he's a doctor). Well, when we married, he wasn't one, and it took many years of being poor before we ever started to have money. I was there for all of that, I didn't show up in his life at the time when he was making the most money that he had ever made! That's what she did, and boy did she like it when he paid her rent! There was more, but those two really wounded in my heart and have yet to heal. He does say now that he was crazy and sick when he said that ( at first he couldn't even remember saying that!), which may be true because now he is in rehab. She was the one to supply him with his drugs! Does that sound to you like someone who loves you?