Thanks, ELad. All your answers have really helped me see some things clearer for my own situation. <p>E, I never meant to imply you didn't have feelings regarding your BW's pain, I have just learned from being on MB that the FOG can buffer you from reality of your surroundings and the impact on others at times. <p>Wasn't it hard to completely get over being with your x-W for so long (20 years). Didn't you find yourself unconsciously thinking of things associated with you two? I know from being with my x-H for that long, the emotional imprint he left me with is a HUGE battle to overcome. Almost daily ... [img]images/icons/frown.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Love,
Jo<p>[ April 01, 2002: Message edited by: Resilient ]</p>

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Resilient:
<strong>Wasn't it hard to completely get over being with your x-W for so long (20 years). Didn't you find yourself unconsciously thinking of things associated with you two? I know from being with my x-H for that long, the emotional imprint he left me with is a HUGE battle to overcome. Almost daily ... [img]images/icons/frown.gif" border="0[/img]
</strong><hr></blockquote><p>Of course it was hard...and although we have not talked much in the past 11 years I remain very fond of her and have very nice memories of our time together. I am sure she has a different view of me and she is totally entitled to feel that way.<p>The emotional imprint is deep. As it is now for me with my WW. It is a daily battle when you expect to hear their voice, see their smile, feel their touch in all the big and small ways you became accustomed to for years.<p>That's what I mean about it being more difficult & painful for the BS...because at least the WS has some (perhaps many) of their ENs being met while the BS has no ENs met--and really has little if any control over it. [img]images/icons/frown.gif" border="0[/img] <p>E

E,<p>Thanks again for putting up with all my pesky questions. I know it was hard to answer some of them. Probably first time you've had to look at it with binoculars, from your BW's point of view, which may have added to your pain, I'm sorry if it did. But I know you will heal now, E. Things will get easier, and you will feel better.<p>So, now I have a Plan B queston for you. Are you going to back-up your Plan B convo with WW with the Plan B letter as Dave suggested? You should you know. <p>We'll help you with it. [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Jo<p>[ April 01, 2002: Message edited by: Resilient ]</p>

Yes...I have been working on a letter. I pretty much figured you and Dave would hold my feet to the fire on that one... [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p>E

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by Elad:
Yes...I have been working on a letter. I pretty much figured you and Dave would hold my feet to the fire on that one... [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p>E<hr></blockquote><p>Hey now! We're not that MB hard lined, are we?<p>Jo

LOL---no I just think you believe in it and want to help that's all...<p>Believe me it is appreciated [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img] <p>E

Well, okay then. Post it here and we'll beat it up for you. <p>Have a fine day, E ....<p>Jo