Originally Posted by Dita1
Hello, new here...no judgement please:(
Hello Dita, you came to the right place.
Your story is a textbook example how affairs start. I hope you are here to find out the right way to end an affair.
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I agree but say, "just as friends".
That moment, you knew you should say 'no', the reason you went anyway is that you had already fallen for him.
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He said all the right things...he knew where I had a gap and he filled that gap.
How do you make sure in the future you will not fall for another man who knows how to fill the gaps? Keep reading articles on this site, you will understand how you got here and how to fix it.
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Tell me what I should be told!
Nobody in his or her right mind wants to have an affair, yet you did. Why? Because you thought it wouldn't happen to you and you ignored the red flags. A bird landed on your head and you allowed it to build its nest.

If you don't adress this now, it will fester and infect. Healing an infected wound is far more diffucult than cleaning and treating the wound fast. In my county we have a saying: soft doctors cause stinking wounds.

Read this article:
https://www.marriagebuilders.com/coping-with-infidelity-beginning-part-1.htm
You will recognise the dynamics how your affair started.

This article explains how to end an affair.
https://www.marriagebuilders.com/coping-with-infidelity-the-end-part-2.htm

The beauty of the MB programm is that it minimizes damage (allthough every affair causes a lot of damage) and maximizes your chances to recover your marriage.

Can you read the articles and come back with questions?

The sooner you come clean to your husband, the sooner your marriage can recover.