FaithfulWifeCJ-Twirler Girl ... - 04/25/07 03:39 PM
"rltraveled,
Not thanks TO the OW...thanks FOR the OW.
And BTW, I realize this is a tall order, but the verse does not say, "In all the easy things that don't hurt and that you're actually thankful for, give thanks..." it says "In EVERY THING give thanks for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you." And yep, I actually did throw up at the time when I was praying to give thanks for the OW, because I was SO mad and SO hurt and just HATED her! She stole my H and did not care in the least that he had children!
But rltraveled, in case you haven't noticed, MB is counter-intuitive to what a "normal" BS response would be...and being a believer is even more counter-intuitive than that! We are supposed to love our enemies and pray for them. We are supposed to repay evil with good. So I prayhed for the OW and thanked God that He had allowed her to come into our lives at that time in order to teach me a lesson. Now, He may have wanted to teach WH something too, but I had to worry about me--and God had to worry about WH! Anyway, because of OW I learned to never take a marriage for granted--NEVER. Because of OW, I learned to obey God again. Because of OW, I learned that love is deciding to treat someone in a loving way--not a "feeling" that feels all warm and smooshy and comes over you. Because of OW, I learned that even the unlovely people are valuable and loved by God. Because of OW, I learned that pain can be good and not to avoid things that hurt because they can make me grow. Because of OW, I learned to "trust in the Lord with all my heart and not lean on my own understanding."
See? I learned a lot of valuable, priceless stuff because she came into our lives at that time. And it hurt me A LOT...and I threw up the first time I said I was thankful (even though my heart wasn't quite there yet)...but being obedient means OBEYING even when it makes no sense and you don't want to.
((rltraveled))
Your faithful friend,
CJ"
Didn't want to TJ on howmuch.
In a way, I understand what you're saying. But sometimes, no, often, I think that God didn't bring OW into our marriage ... Satan did. Why would God do such a horrible, destructive thing. I've mentioned before, how, during his whole A, I saw nothing but darkness in FWH's eyes, dark shadows followed him everywhere he went. I'm not kidding.
And ... on a different website, someone called me a "Christian Doormat" for taking him back. Wow, that put me in a funk mood.
I really am feeling a struggle within me right now --- on the one side God wants me to just let this damned thing GO, and get on with it. On the other hand, I just want to be let alone, by everyone. Never, ever trust, never give, extend, hope. A voice keeps telling me, you do it, you'll get burned, RLT. It's happened your whole life. Now, is nothing different.
Not thanks TO the OW...thanks FOR the OW.
And BTW, I realize this is a tall order, but the verse does not say, "In all the easy things that don't hurt and that you're actually thankful for, give thanks..." it says "In EVERY THING give thanks for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you." And yep, I actually did throw up at the time when I was praying to give thanks for the OW, because I was SO mad and SO hurt and just HATED her! She stole my H and did not care in the least that he had children!
But rltraveled, in case you haven't noticed, MB is counter-intuitive to what a "normal" BS response would be...and being a believer is even more counter-intuitive than that! We are supposed to love our enemies and pray for them. We are supposed to repay evil with good. So I prayhed for the OW and thanked God that He had allowed her to come into our lives at that time in order to teach me a lesson. Now, He may have wanted to teach WH something too, but I had to worry about me--and God had to worry about WH! Anyway, because of OW I learned to never take a marriage for granted--NEVER. Because of OW, I learned to obey God again. Because of OW, I learned that love is deciding to treat someone in a loving way--not a "feeling" that feels all warm and smooshy and comes over you. Because of OW, I learned that even the unlovely people are valuable and loved by God. Because of OW, I learned that pain can be good and not to avoid things that hurt because they can make me grow. Because of OW, I learned to "trust in the Lord with all my heart and not lean on my own understanding."
See? I learned a lot of valuable, priceless stuff because she came into our lives at that time. And it hurt me A LOT...and I threw up the first time I said I was thankful (even though my heart wasn't quite there yet)...but being obedient means OBEYING even when it makes no sense and you don't want to.
((rltraveled))
Your faithful friend,
CJ"
Didn't want to TJ on howmuch.
In a way, I understand what you're saying. But sometimes, no, often, I think that God didn't bring OW into our marriage ... Satan did. Why would God do such a horrible, destructive thing. I've mentioned before, how, during his whole A, I saw nothing but darkness in FWH's eyes, dark shadows followed him everywhere he went. I'm not kidding.
And ... on a different website, someone called me a "Christian Doormat" for taking him back. Wow, that put me in a funk mood.
I really am feeling a struggle within me right now --- on the one side God wants me to just let this damned thing GO, and get on with it. On the other hand, I just want to be let alone, by everyone. Never, ever trust, never give, extend, hope. A voice keeps telling me, you do it, you'll get burned, RLT. It's happened your whole life. Now, is nothing different.