Scripture tells us to pray for our enemies. We expose them so that their is no activity that is not hidden from the world.

I believe we should be angry for their insult to Gods holy institution of marriage. How do we reconcile this to seeking their benefit?

Tell us your story.

Stella,

This is for those posters like GWN, Kickme who were/are ordained ministers. Obviously there is a great deal of stress in their lives.

As I pray for these folk I realise that that there witness is under great stress. I seek for ways that a Christian can honour God under trying circumstances.

imagine,

I too am curious about your story...

Mrs. W

Ms. W.

You know the story.

SB

Imagine, I would ask you to entertain that it isn't just Christians who need to honor G-d during trying times, but ALL humans.

I choose to believe that we honor G-d by our actions. I choose to not become bitter, but look at my part, change my part and become a better person. I choose to seek G-d and ask him what he needs from me to honor him and serve him.

In the AA big book there is a page on resentments where for two solid weeks it is suggested to pray for the person you resent. We aren't G-d, we are HUMANS and don't see the bigger picture.

I'm certainly not suggesting we make it easy on them, like them, wish the best etc. I'm just suggesting that honoring G-d is leaving them in G-ds hands.

Queenie,

I liked your answer.


imagine might want to respond with the truth of his story, given the "Christian" nature of the question, and many of his posts.

SB

There doesn't seem to be one.

Like yourselves I carry very great burden when a Christian is under strain. More so than a non-Christian who does not have the responsibility of representing Christ.

I believe that any circumstance is allowed by God for a purpose. We can observe Job who had testified strongly in God's favour, but was used to serve as an example of God's strength, sovereignty and love.

I can plainly envisage the pain and frustration in a Christian's heart as he struggles to deal with his own circumstances. Many non Christians might say that a believer has the power to combat the circumstances. I believe they are correct. But only in Christ.

Against the advice of this panel of not educating affair participants. May there not be opportunity to share personal witness that will extend God's kingdom?

Imagine,

Why the reticence to share your story? I realize there is no rule here that says that you have to, of course, but I do feel that you would be taken more seriously if you chose to be forthcoming...

Mrs. W

It's called being deceiving.

Thanks for your valued input Queenie.

There is a Scripture in the New Testament that instructs a Christian to take up his daily cross. One of the testimonies of a Christian is that they will suffer in their Christian walk.

Failure to experience suffering for their faith is strongly going to question their spiritual strength. I'm looking at infidelity being a test of their spiritual depth.

Listen to alot of John Lennon do you?

Hmmm! Pariah I always wondered why they tossed you out the church.

Hi Mrs W,

I started half a story for Zen on Valentines day. Still need to complete it.

I will look forward to reading it, Imagine. Thanks!

Mrs. W

I know why.

C'mon take another swipe.

Seems I struck the right nerve about your user name.

The answer is yes... and many times over. The fact that an OP still draws breath means a BS has chosen to resist the fleshly desire for revenge. Only God knows how many prayers have been sent up by betrayed spouses who earnestly feared for the souls of their WS AND the OP. Many times what an OP doesn't see and hear is a stronger witness than any words an OP would accept from a BS... though the OP may not realize that fact.

Christians who have been through affairs learn new lessons about faith, love, forgiveness, long suffering and mercy that make them better witnesses in many different areas of their lives.
That said, it is unwise and unnecessary for a betrayed spouse or a wayward spouse to feel responsible for directly ministering to the OP. God will send someone else to do that job.

LOL. Sorry, the question seemed so obscure, I had no idea of the questions inception. Imagination is part of my personality. My house is full of innovative gadgets of my own design.

I hope too that I can offer an imaginative solution to somebodies marital problem.

I'd be pretty happy to "minister" to OM with a baseball bat actually.

Yeah! This is pretty much my initial reaction. It takes quite a bit of effort on my part to stop praying for OP's annihilation.

Pariah,

You're right. I really liked John Lennon's lyrics. The Best.

Imagine. Great song - there were other users here who had Beatles' names, too. Imagine is just added to that list....

SB

The advice of loving your enemies vs hating their sin isn't contradictory at all, if you study the Bible with an open heart, led by the Holy Spirit. When Jesus hung on the cross and prayed for forgiveness for His enemies, He never once tried to minimize what they were doing, or to say that it wasn't really that bad.

Hebrews 12 gives such a stirring instruction on how we should deal with all the troubles and trials of life, including ones where people have hurt us.


In other words, if our Master Himself endured such suffering at the hands of sinners, we can find the patience and strength to deal with the wrongs done to us by others, by looking to His example.


Sometimes we get caught up in the chastisement of others, especially someone very close to us, like our spouse. Still, we can trust that God will only allow the things to happen to us that He can work for our best good, and for His glory.

AJ's adultery - the worst pain of my life - was a very harsh scourging. Yet God allowed it to purify me; to take away defects of character that were an obstacle to closeness with Him. He taught me to listen to Him, and to be patient when there was no visible hope. I am a child of the King, and more aware of that now than ever before.


That bears repeating. Our trials, even those where loved ones wound us and shatter us to our very core, are permitted so that we can be partakers of Jesus' holiness. He places such a high value on purity and holiness that He gave up His own blood to preserve it in us.


And here we come to the whole crux of the matter, as it relates to an OP. We are to be diligent lest any root of bitterness spring up within us.

So no matter what love, what righteous anger, what longing for the day of God's judgment to be poured out on the wicked for their cruelty, or any other seemingly conflicting emotions we may feel...

we are to be diligent that we do not become bitter.

This is the two courses:

1. Rebuking the action of infidelity.
2. Providing an example for spiritual growth under extreme circumstances.

I am pleased that Kickme has come to a place of peace in his situation.
I pray that Greatwhitenorth would update.

Does anyone feel that by retaining this balance that waywards are contending directly with God?

What has your spiritual journey been like?


One of many blessings I have gained from this experience is to have a ready witness - concrete ways God has changed my life and blessed me.

I'm always so interested to hear the witness of brothers and sisters of the faith.

I have been blessed to see God's miraculous answer to prayer. Answers that I could not envisage.

He has given me many talents. And restricted their use that I give Him glory.

There are things which happen to me which is personal and is very unlikely to change the heart of a unbeliever or even a believer who has not experienced God's private ministry.

I have pondered this question for some time now.

This is without a doubt the hardest journey of my life. Why?
I have stated on my threads that at one time in my life I was called by God to minister. I became disillusioned with the church and simply walked away. I was living my life under God's will in my mind but not with my heart.

As a Christian you know that God will allow us to make our own choices in our lives. However, when a person's choices conflict with God's will, He will guide you back to the path that pleases Him. When this happens, we can choose to surrender to His will or we can continue to be disobedient.

For me, the choice was very easy. You see, I KNEW that I was living a partial lie. I KNEW I was not allowing God to fully guide me. As much as it hurts to admit, I was unequally yoked with my WAW. I continued to walk with God throughout our M, but I never served God according to scripture. I was NOT the spiritial leader of my family. Simply impossible to serve the Lord if your own house is not in order.

I am human and I am not immune to the hurt and destruction that this A has caused. We were a happy family. This path that I was taking was not the path that God wanted me on. I keep saying that I have peace. These are not words, the peace is very REAL to me because I understand and ACCEPT that God has something in store for me that goes beyond anything I could imagine. That is His promise to me and to all that allow His presence in their lives.

As far as the question as to how to handle the OM....Neak has hit the mark with the scripture quoted. For me, I can only pray for my WAW and the OM. I earnestly pray that God will lead them to salvation IF and WHEN they repent.

People ask me all the time, how do you find the strength to endure all that you are going through?.....that ANYONE would ask this means that I am giving them my personal testimony through my actions. God smiles, I smile, and hopefully walking under God's complete will will make others smile. All God asks of us is to share His Word with others.....I don't really want to stand on a street corner preaching the Word.....but when a friend or better yet a family member or stranger ASK you "why are you so happy...or how are you handling your situation so well?".............you gotta know already how I respond....

Everything else just falls into place. I am AT PEACE!!

Thank you for sharing your hint of a testimony. Maybe someday you'll feel comfortable enough here to share more of how God has blessed you and changed your life.

Kickme - that was beautiful.

One of the most incredible things about God is how He works to bring us back into His will, even when from a human standpoint we've made a hopeless muddle of it all. Then, with Him in charge, it ends up working beautifully anyway.

Neak, I mean this with all sincerity, thanks for your comments and support.

Sorry, today I'm on my soap box. Been also thinking about this for some time.

We all wish there could be some special pill we could take that would allow the pain to fade or an injection we could give our WS that would bring them back home. Sadly, not yet.

BUT....using MB principals as a reference...someone posted to me awhile back that I should not be afraid of exposure because my M is DEAD. I thought at first that was a mean thing to say. After some serious thought I understood what was meant by that.

You see, right now, I challenge anyone reading this to understand that you have nothing to loose and PEACE to gain if you will simply find a quiet place and talk to God. Talk to him like He is your Dad. He already knows your thoughts so do not try to sugar coat a conversation with Him. TALK TO HIM.

Pray for His direction in your life, pray for peace in your life, pray for wisdom in your life...just pray, you have nothing to loose.

Kickme,

There is a lady called Hopenpray that experienced the same as you. Her husband has already remarried.

Possibly you could share with her. She needs God's peace.

Thank you for pointing that out to me.

Also, thank you for all your kind words.