Please! Need All Your Advice! - 06/06/06 09:41 PM
First of all, Hope you can understand my English, I born Here but I grew up in Europe. So I hope you can be able to read my post in what Im feeling right now! and give me your advice! Thanks!
Me and my wife been married for a little over a year, I made a big big mistake, I cheat on my wife in a night stand last year, I was completly wrong, I regret it, I repent and paying the consecuenses of my acts, I ask for forgivness and Im been trying to improve myself, after she found out. (she read txt msg from my cell phone) and of course I never denied. i go church, I read tons of books, but now Im just getting crazy! I dont know what to do, have so many questions! Oh my gosh is just horrible.
I just found out that my wife is having an affair with her ex boyfriend, (she was with him 6 months before I meet her)
we went to las vegas for a wedding and when we got back to dallas she said to me Im not going home with you, I have a ride! well after that day, my life start to change in a nightmare! can't sleep, can't eat! she was spending everynight somewhere, and she show up home everyday in the morning (7:30 am) and she was home until 4 pm, I got her cell phone and rI found that she is sending some text messages and I found that that she is staying with her ex boyfriend. I did ran a background check on him, to see what type of person was and find where he lives. So I went to see how he lives and my surprise was that this guy lives so bad, in a nasty apartment complex etc.etc. we have a very decent home,also we are building our dream house ready to move sometime in August, now I dont know what is going to happend with that! but she is with this person every night, and now she is not comming home at all, she took a most of her clothes. but of course, I was bother her a lots with I love you, call her cell phone so many times and sak her for One more chance, and I was on and on and on into that. I know was a mistake, but I was desperate. about week and half later she told me that she will come back if I gave her a new car, she asked for a mini cooper, well I went to the dealership and bought the mini cooper she want, of course I was doing everything she ask for. Also because we both knows this guy dont have a stable financial and i dont know him and I can trust my wife I went to the bank and transfer all the money in a safe account that she dont know, just to protect our savings. About a week and half later, she told me that she was pregnant, me ON SHOCK! WOW!!!!!!!!!! we were trying so hard last year and now she is pregnant. I asked her how long you been with this guy and she answer about a month, I took her to a doctor and the doctor confirm that se is pregnant between 6 and 7 weeks.
of course I still have a doubt, but now Im trying to work hard and dont think the baby is his, and is mine.
Im so hurt, im so mad, I dont know what to do! I have questions that I dont have an answer:
How long an affair take for she to realize what she is losing?
Does she is ever going to come back?
Does an affair always end?
what kind of behavior I need to approach in order to get her back home?
Does a woman when she is pregnant and her emotions change and also her body will be able to forgive, and save the marriage?
If she need space, how Im suppose to work in that? what Im supposse to do?
In this crisis what I suppose to communicate with her without making any more mistakes? like I love you a 1000 times, calling her. you know! because Im desperate.
Should I give her some money? I dont know?
What is the percentage that affairs will end soon?
Does she will miss me, miss our home, our dogs? at some point
How the pregnancy will affect a chance to reconcile?
This are just some questions that past over my head right now. I really appreciate the time, and advise base in your experience or others that can help me survive and have a hope!
Me and my wife been married for a little over a year, I made a big big mistake, I cheat on my wife in a night stand last year, I was completly wrong, I regret it, I repent and paying the consecuenses of my acts, I ask for forgivness and Im been trying to improve myself, after she found out. (she read txt msg from my cell phone) and of course I never denied. i go church, I read tons of books, but now Im just getting crazy! I dont know what to do, have so many questions! Oh my gosh is just horrible.
I just found out that my wife is having an affair with her ex boyfriend, (she was with him 6 months before I meet her)
we went to las vegas for a wedding and when we got back to dallas she said to me Im not going home with you, I have a ride! well after that day, my life start to change in a nightmare! can't sleep, can't eat! she was spending everynight somewhere, and she show up home everyday in the morning (7:30 am) and she was home until 4 pm, I got her cell phone and rI found that she is sending some text messages and I found that that she is staying with her ex boyfriend. I did ran a background check on him, to see what type of person was and find where he lives. So I went to see how he lives and my surprise was that this guy lives so bad, in a nasty apartment complex etc.etc. we have a very decent home,also we are building our dream house ready to move sometime in August, now I dont know what is going to happend with that! but she is with this person every night, and now she is not comming home at all, she took a most of her clothes. but of course, I was bother her a lots with I love you, call her cell phone so many times and sak her for One more chance, and I was on and on and on into that. I know was a mistake, but I was desperate. about week and half later she told me that she will come back if I gave her a new car, she asked for a mini cooper, well I went to the dealership and bought the mini cooper she want, of course I was doing everything she ask for. Also because we both knows this guy dont have a stable financial and i dont know him and I can trust my wife I went to the bank and transfer all the money in a safe account that she dont know, just to protect our savings. About a week and half later, she told me that she was pregnant, me ON SHOCK! WOW!!!!!!!!!! we were trying so hard last year and now she is pregnant. I asked her how long you been with this guy and she answer about a month, I took her to a doctor and the doctor confirm that se is pregnant between 6 and 7 weeks.
of course I still have a doubt, but now Im trying to work hard and dont think the baby is his, and is mine.
Im so hurt, im so mad, I dont know what to do! I have questions that I dont have an answer:
How long an affair take for she to realize what she is losing?
Does she is ever going to come back?
Does an affair always end?
what kind of behavior I need to approach in order to get her back home?
Does a woman when she is pregnant and her emotions change and also her body will be able to forgive, and save the marriage?
If she need space, how Im suppose to work in that? what Im supposse to do?
In this crisis what I suppose to communicate with her without making any more mistakes? like I love you a 1000 times, calling her. you know! because Im desperate.
Should I give her some money? I dont know?
What is the percentage that affairs will end soon?
Does she will miss me, miss our home, our dogs? at some point
How the pregnancy will affect a chance to reconcile?
This are just some questions that past over my head right now. I really appreciate the time, and advise base in your experience or others that can help me survive and have a hope!