hello everyone,

long time no post. here is an update on my life: found out that my h was having an affair in July/05 and that he has two children outside of our marriage. The plot thickens because he has yet to get a DNA done on either kid and the ****** who the children are with continues to call and harass me. Update: wh left on the day before new year's eve and has only come to visit a couple of times since. He states that he is living alone and he just needs some time to think. Should i just go ahead and file for divorce even though he is still in my heart? my mind says let the ****** go and my heart says try to work it out. please advise.

Well, since this site IS Marriage Builders, I will say you need to work on it. Have you read the info here? Not the discussion forums, but the articles and Q&A section - there is plenty of ideas to work on. Do you have children of your own? How long have you been married? I think you can still do Plan A in your situation. Here's a link: Plan A&B Keep us posted.

we have been married for 3 and a 1/2 years. we have two children together s6 and d3 and they totally do not understand because we have never argued in front of them. I have tried plan a and now he is doing plan b on his own

You could do plan A from far, words of your action travels.

Hang in there.

-rh-