Divorce Remorse - 09/25/02 03:35 PM
Hello All,
I am a newcomer to the forum and I am in need of Christian advice. I will try to keep this as brief as possible.
In 1996 my Ex H and I were married. He was 25 and I was 21 and 3 mo.pregnant. My parents insisted that we marry b/c of the circumstances. We did love each other but we were not ready to get married. We went through with the wedding and were married for 4 years. We had some good times together and quite a few bad times. We fought a lot about finances and the lack of attention that he showed me etc... but we never had any real major problems such as adultry or any type of abuse. Things just weren't the way I thought they were supposed to be. We began fighting more and more to the point of not being able to communicate anymore...at all. He refused to go to marriage helpers and basically just was in denial that we had any problems.
We got to the point that we did not sleep together b/c he said that I turned him off, we did not speak, the only thing that was keeping us together was our wonderful son that we both adore. I filed for divorce after a year of threats. I was absolutely miserable in the marriage and just couldn't take him rejecting me anymore. He did not want the divorce but I just wouldn't hear of coming back, I was very hurt.
A year after our divorce was final I moved 2 hours away from the city where we lived for a career opportunity and to get away from his memory b/c I missed him so much but I had too much pride to let him know. He is not happy with me b/c I moved b/c of our son. He begs me to move back all the time. If I knew that he and I could work things out and begin building a relationship again I would move back in a heartbeat but... My ex is a wonderful man and a excellent father, I think about him all the time and I love him so much. I have asked him out twice and both times he pretty much said no, I know he still loves me, and we have a wonderful relationship now. He has told his friends that he wishes I would come back etc... We talk about our marriage and divorce a lot and where we went wrong. He calls about twice a week to check on our son and me. I have told him that I am sorry for hurting him and that I made a big mistake, I have asked for his forgiveness and he says that he forgives me b/c he played a large roll in our divorce too.
We have both dated lots of people, I am dating someone right now but for some reason neither of us have committed to anyone. I can't imagine spending the rest of my life with anyone but him (my ex).
I am sorry to have been so long winded but I really need some advice. Thank you so much for your time.
I am a newcomer to the forum and I am in need of Christian advice. I will try to keep this as brief as possible.
In 1996 my Ex H and I were married. He was 25 and I was 21 and 3 mo.pregnant. My parents insisted that we marry b/c of the circumstances. We did love each other but we were not ready to get married. We went through with the wedding and were married for 4 years. We had some good times together and quite a few bad times. We fought a lot about finances and the lack of attention that he showed me etc... but we never had any real major problems such as adultry or any type of abuse. Things just weren't the way I thought they were supposed to be. We began fighting more and more to the point of not being able to communicate anymore...at all. He refused to go to marriage helpers and basically just was in denial that we had any problems.
We got to the point that we did not sleep together b/c he said that I turned him off, we did not speak, the only thing that was keeping us together was our wonderful son that we both adore. I filed for divorce after a year of threats. I was absolutely miserable in the marriage and just couldn't take him rejecting me anymore. He did not want the divorce but I just wouldn't hear of coming back, I was very hurt.
A year after our divorce was final I moved 2 hours away from the city where we lived for a career opportunity and to get away from his memory b/c I missed him so much but I had too much pride to let him know. He is not happy with me b/c I moved b/c of our son. He begs me to move back all the time. If I knew that he and I could work things out and begin building a relationship again I would move back in a heartbeat but... My ex is a wonderful man and a excellent father, I think about him all the time and I love him so much. I have asked him out twice and both times he pretty much said no, I know he still loves me, and we have a wonderful relationship now. He has told his friends that he wishes I would come back etc... We talk about our marriage and divorce a lot and where we went wrong. He calls about twice a week to check on our son and me. I have told him that I am sorry for hurting him and that I made a big mistake, I have asked for his forgiveness and he says that he forgives me b/c he played a large roll in our divorce too.
We have both dated lots of people, I am dating someone right now but for some reason neither of us have committed to anyone. I can't imagine spending the rest of my life with anyone but him (my ex).
I am sorry to have been so long winded but I really need some advice. Thank you so much for your time.