The second mistake I made in recovery was a neglect of the details. I had all my major boundaries in place, but didn't absorb or implement the fine print, the closing of every possible avenue, no matter how tiny, whereby Gargamel could contact AJ.

I have been reading through this part of my old thread, trying to remember more of what went wrong, but those seemingly insignificant contacts so shattered me that I was appearing to function but without so much as a synapse firing inside my brain.

It's all there in black and white, they told me what I needed to do, and I responded back approvingly. Even to read it myself, I sounded like I had a good grasp of what was going on. I don't remember any of it. I know we switched his cell phone and issued his to one of the other employees.

Hindsight will become 20/20 if you let it, and I can see now that even though there were numerous details that should have been attended to from day 1, the means through which the second phase of the A was established was something I wouldn't have guessed.

Around the 24th of May, AJ was scheduled for his first day back since PBL Day, at the job where the A had started. She had already been forced to resign even before D-day, so she wouldn't be working with him - her only job was still with our company. I thought it might bother him a bit to go back again.

He said it wouldn't, so I didn't push the issue. BUT, since he was also scheduled to work the next day, a much-hated Wednesday, I made it very clear that I would meet him right after work and go out with him.

Tuesday night he was fine, and said everything was so different with the new boss that it didn't bother him to be back. He seemed like he meant it, so I mentally filed it away as Case Closed.

When quitting time came the next day, I was waiting in the parking lot. He was surprised to see me, and a bit irritated. He had no recollection that we were going out to dinner, and said he was too tired and just wanted to go home. Plus, he and another lady had just gotten back from removing several animals from sewer-infested conditions, and his point that he was too dirty to be in public was valid.

I grabbed takeout and met him at home.

Much later I learned that Gargamel had found out from some of her friends that he would be working that day, then went by and left a note on his car. She told him she would heal so much better if she could only hear from him once in a while, she missed him sooooooooo much, and please just call!

He did.